Single parents with no family support, what jobs work around school?

[saffierose00]

Hi, I'm hoping to get some advice on what jobs other single parents do. Especially with a lack of any family help. They go to their dad's some weekends but that's a complicated and unreliable situation , and he lives too far for school pick ups/drop offs

Two kids now 3 and 6

In all honesty I had kids too young before I had any career sorted. I pushed through uni anyway whilst I had my first and completed a psychology degree. I had a bad few years with mental health, bad relationship with kids dad and living in family hostel to get out of it but now I'm settled with kids and I'm trying to get out there and getting nowhere.

I'm really struggling job wise, I really do want to work. I did a level 2 teaching assistant course, but no where is taking me with not enough references. I volunteered at a charity shop for a while to build confidence and experience but it's not enough for the teaching agencies to take me on seemingly.

I've looked at other jobs but I'm struggling with finding one that would work school hours. I don't mind using wraparound care but 5 days a week I would think is too much for little kids. Then it comes to the holidays I have no help so I have no idea what I'd do then and that's why I was trying to go for teaching assistant.

I want to work , I just feel stuck . I don't drive and that's another incentive to want to work. I just feel like I'm failing the kids when I want to do better than this

I think the only job you can do would involve working in a school but obviously you can't do that without references. How many teaching agencies have actually turned you down due to lack of references?

Please don't feel like you're failing them (although its a feeling i really understand) you're doing the absolute best you can in a very tough situation.

I have a child with sen who can't access wraparound or holiday clubs. The only way I've found it possible to work was being self employed. Is there anything self employed you feel you could do?

It is incredibly tough situation please don't be hard on yourself.

can you train as a childminder? Then you could look after a child at the same time as your 3yo. Or work in the wraparound care at school and take kids with you? Lunchtime assistant /dinner lady?
my friend volunteered at her child’s primary school first and then got a TA job there.

Care work - elderly, children and adults (SEN) - struggle to recruit.

My local council has job adverts running continuously. Flexible working, including term time only, is offered because someone working some of the time, is better than nobody at all. It is always worth a conversation if you see an advert.
Also try some of the larger providers like Cambian.
Risk assessments may cover your referencing.

School struggle for teaching assistants. Can you volunteer? Risk assessments and volunteer policies will cover your situation. For instance as a volunteer you will not be left alone with children, to meet safeguarding requirements in keeping children safe. A job may follow.
Reference requirement to work with children are strict though, following the Safer Recruitment part of Keeping Children Safe in Education.

Perhaps start work in a less ‘vulnerable’ role.

Amazon offers flexible customer service jobs. Some are remote some in their centres. On this remote job, click through from the perks and benefits link which explains family friendly policies and flexible working.

https://www.jobsatamazon.co.uk/customer-service/virtual

I had my first child at 16, went to college / uni then at 24 moved to London for a job, so 250 miles away from family. I am a civil servant and worked flexi hours all these years (25yrs later now) and I later had 2 more children, and their dad ended up going overseas to work so most of it fell to me. I managed using wrap around care and holiday clubs. Youngest is 18 now and thankful i’ve survived that chapter. It’s definitely do-able in the right job. I’ve still managed to work my way up the ladder, though slower than other people.

Not to be contrary, but I’m a single parent and worked slightly reduced hours or full time (and then some) from DS being 1. He was at nursery 4 days a week from 18 months, then later full time. And in wraparound 4 days when he started school. They just get on with it tbh.

If you’re very averse to putting them into childcare full time or almost full time, you might be better looking at part time jobs that are 9-5, and using wraparound 3 days a week. There’s probably more of that out there than school hours only.

Also no family support.

job share? So you are only using wrap around care 2/3 times a week

Home working /flexible working could work. Many local authorities offer this as part of their policy is working around families.

In your shoes I would work part time and take any job where my employer was flexible and willing to let me work school hours so 9-3. Then use UC as a top up.

What about being a dinner lady to get some experience in school?

It just wasn't possible for me to work part time as a single parent with young DCs. I lived quite rurally with limited job options and no family within 200 miles.

I found a brilliant childminder who lived on the same street. Looking back, I'm glad I took that path. I was able to establish a career and build an identity for myself which became increasingly important as the DCs grew up. Yes, it was really hard in the early days, and I got into a lot of debt (childcare cost more than the maintenance received) and salary didn't cover mortgage and bills to start with. I was very lucky in that my DCs were rarely ill (and when they were they preferred being with CM as she looked after them better!).

wraparound care isn’t “too much” for little kids they soon get used to it - sounds like an excuse not to work TBH and people who don’t have the luxury of not working (obviously your bills are being paid somehow…..) would use wraparound childcare

Many non- single parent families have both parents working full time without family support so there's nobody there after school and as others have said, wraparound care is the only option. A lot of families in our school use childminders for pick up and after school. And for the three year old, nurseries often do 8 til 6 (which is the hours my children attended.) It's very hard to find jobs within school hours as you are finding so to build your career I think you may have to consider other options. You sound very motivated, I hope things work out for you.

What job would you actually want to do?

I personally think it's short sighted to go for a low paid school hours job, long term that's not good for supporting your family.

I would go for a job that you could progress in over time, use wraparound 5 x a week to start with, establish yourself then ask to go down to 4 days a week. Holidays - use some annual leave, hopefully your ex will take some leave and some childcare

Very clearly I want to work. I've done a degree , teaching assistant course and volunteering in order to gain a work reference. But I also value time with my kids. I wouldn't put them in wraparound care 5 days a week. 3-4 days I would do yes. My son is only 3 so I'm not putting him into nursery 8-6 5 days a week.

Thankfully I'm finally getting somewhere with one agency who accepted my references, and my enhanced DBS check is getting processed too 🙏

The sons nurserys (and others I know do the same) unfortunately won't accommodate that. Is have to pay for the school hours 9-3 every day I did , which would cost more than I earn. Same issue with lunchtime supervisor

Eventually I intend to progress in psychology.
But job wise now , anything really I'm happy with some wraparound care but ideally not 8-6 5 days a week. I would've been happy with retail but they all seem to want either weekends or late evenings (past 6pm nursery pick up times). I'm not bothered about building a good career until the kids are older, I just want work to get by.

My ex I can't rely on as will cancel with excuses with short notice . And I'm not wanting to increase his time for children's sake and I doubt he would anyway. e.g daughter's supposed to wear an AFO splint and do exercises daily which he fails to do. He's had them briefly for more but if he has them a whole week (in holidays) they wouldn't see the outside of his flat again til I picked them up.

This is what I'm hoping to do but I'm happy to work 9-5/ 8-6 f it's 3 days a week too. I'm hoping to do this as a TA just waiting for everything to go through now 🙏

I did cleaning.
It’s not career enhancing as such but it worked well whilst my DC was very young.
It did help me build my confidence and gave me references.

I have noticed a few cleaning and factory jobs that fit in with school hours now.

Your biggest issue is going to be the holidays.
I found that holiday clubs do not start very early/finish late and so finding a job between 9-3pm is going to work better all year round.

If you want to do term time only you may struggle to find a job in a school but look in colleges and universities too as although these won’t have the same holidays as a school, they may have more holidays or more flexibility during school holidays than other jobs.

Well done on getting your degree.
I agree that a career may be difficult whilst the kids are so little, as psychology jobs are usually long hours but you could look at unis as they sometimes advertise for TAs or psychology technicians.

Also a lot of places ask for admin/receptionist staff and these are a great way to get in.
I know someone who was working as a receptionist at a psychology company and then moved onto becoming an assistant psychologist.

Honestly @saffierose00 if you do actually want to work you have to accept you’ll likely need wraparound.

im also a solo parent to a 3 year old and they’re in nursery 7:30-6. Not ideal but I value working. I’m a civil servant and 0.8FTE is open to anyone. 2 or 3 days wfh and flexible hours.

public sector can be quite flexible with core hours (usually 10-3) so you can balance doing some drop offs and some collections on a 32h/0.8 contract.

But ultimately you need to decide if you want to work and are willing to use wraparound or if you would quite like to work but not that much.

I am more than happy to use wraparound care as said , it's only that I don't want kids to be care 8-6pm every single weekday which I don't think is unreasonable. I obviously want to work as I wouldn't have done all these steps in order to work.

Thank you for this helpful comment. I've screenshotted it to save actually. If TA doesn't work out I'll look at cleaning jobs/receptionist jobs.

Parish Clerk jobs are typically flexible, home working apart from one evening meeting every month or two for a few hours, I used to use a babysitter to look after them.

They will pay for training for qualification and there is good progression - town or city clerks can be paid £70k+ a year plus.