I have suffered with anxiety for as long as I can remember. I saw a child psychiatrist in my very early teens and that’s when I was first prescribed anti-depressants and I’ve been on and off them ever since.
Throughout my life I’ve struggled with anxiety and OCD and the physical effects of it everyday. Not the cleaning everything OCD, but the intrusive thoughts and excessive checking. Believing the intrusive thoughts and at times becoming very unwell because of it, so much so I could barely eat and became very underweight during my worst period.
There have been times things have got especially bad and rehabilitating, i’ve had to ask for reasonable adjustments.
For me it’s the physical effects that make things hard - headaches, nausea, stomach problems, panicking so much I can’t think straight. Plus the sleep issues which mean I regularly take travel sickness pills.
I always end up back on medication. Therapy helps but for me it’s just not enough.
I am very private about these struggles as I worry about stigma and also that people won’t understand as everyone has stress. When things have got very hard I’ve felt so ashamed asking for adjustments or telling people about my issues as I feel weak. I only did so when it got to the point where I really had to.
I now potentially need to tell my employer about these struggles as they’re asking us to voice any disabilities or health issues - it’s in my interest to do so. But I’m worried it all sounds like an excuse and I just look pathetic as people should be able to recover from this shouldn’t they?