I want ti quit my job but I’m not brave enough, it’s affecting my mental health so much

[Cherryma]

I have worked in an office for a community care company for a few years. It’s really now come to the point I dread going in due to workload and how certain people speak to me, sometimes I cry when I get home and I can’t switch off.

We also have an on call system where I have to be on call all week once every 3 weeks, including the weekend. It’s very long hours for this and I have to deal with everything that comes up on my own.

My manager is very supportive but there is not much they can do. My workload seems to constantly increase and I am doing so much beyond my job role. The company won’t hire anyone else to help me. The money isn’t brilliant but if I quit I would feel like I am betraying the manager by going. I am applying for different jobs not in this field now but when it comes to it I don’t know if I can bring myself to quit. Any advice would be appreciated thank you.

Quit that job. You are replaceable at the end of the day you do not owe your manager any loyalty.

You are replaceable. They will replace you, possibly with 2+ people. They have not because you are doing the work

So find something else and leave

Thank you, hopefully I get some interviews in the new year but the thought of quitting makes me feel sick because it is a stable job but I don’t know much longer I can take doing this.

How are you going to support yourself if you quit? Can you get a job lined up first and then quit?

Life is too short to stay in a job that makes you miserable. I quit a job two years ago with no job to go to, which wasn’t something I ever thought I’d do but I was so unhappy I couldn’t stay any longer. After a couple of months not working I got another job which unfortunately was also awful, for different reasons 😭

Four months into Bad Job No.2 I was headhunted by another company. I started with the new company just over a year ago and I’m the happiest I’ve been at work for years.

I often think back to when I handed in my notice to Bad Job No.1. I can't actually believe I did it, but thank goodness I did. Honestly, life is too short. You spend so much time at work, you deserve to be somewhere that doesn’t make you miserable. It’s not much to ask ❤️

Your manager can also leave, if they choose to. You must look out for your mental and physical wellbeing.

Thank you so much. It’s harder because as bad as it is there are some aspects I enjoy and I know I would feel like I’d failed if I quit. But do I really want to be there in 5 years time wishing I’d gone and life could be completely different. Most days now I am comfort eating and buying myself things to cheer myself up which isn’t sustainable.

You can't make yourself completely miserable because you're worried about letting your manager down OP. Don't live your life for other people, especially not random people like your work manager! Keep looking for something else and as soon as you find it leave.

I’ve just handed in my resignation on my job!
I can’t carry on with the hours I’m working, so I’m walking away from my job where I work 144 hours a month!
I don’t know what I’m going to do once I finish but I do know I won’t be working full time again any time soon!

I’m like you! It’s easy to get exploited when you are competent and good-natured. Believe me, there are other stable jobs out there and you have to advocate for yourself - if you get given more work, you need recognition beyond just your manager’s gratitude: this is work, you deserve to be compensated for your effort. So that means promotion or more pay or an extra day’s holiday or a bonus.

Go for the interviews and see what’s out there - you might find it gives you confidence to leave or at least an opportunity to practice explaining how good you are and why you merit a better job

As someone else asked, will you be able to support yourself without a job? I know if I couldn’t find a job and was struggling financially, that would also affect my mental health, but I don’t know what your circumstances are.