Returning to work

[Ajb92]

Is it reasonable to be expected to go back to work at 9 months pp full time with no childcare? We miss the ‘9 months’ funding for my baby for April, so we won’t get the funding til September. We can’t afford to send him without the funded hours. So I am now looking at returning to work full time (I WFH) look after a baby, who doesn’t sleep through the night, won’t nap independently, is breast fed and will be eating 3 meals a day, run a household and walk a dog… with no family support near by. What’s the alternative? Can’t afford for me to not work. Feel it’s impossible

I say this gently, you cannot work full time from home with a 9 month old. It’s not fair on either of you and after seeing colleagues with babies this age at home in Covid- it flags major safety issues. Sorry I haven’t come with alternatives but sure someone else with.

Agree. You need to organise some childcare even if wfh. Even having someone looking after him in the house is distracting. Maybe look at a local childminder short term. You could delay returning until baby is a year old but those last few months of ml will be unpaid unless you use accrued paid leave. Chances are your childcare cost for those months will be less than your earnings so still worthwhile until September.

And bear in mind baby may not be breast-fed, or have such broken nights by then and nap better. Who is suggesting you should do this?

No it's not reasonable. You won't be able to do it!

We managed someone out as their child was disrupting our zoom calls and the person would go AWOL and not submit quality work. And the expectation of our department is to be highest performing.

I did this in COVID and it nearly broke me. I was a terrible staff member and terrible mother. You might have a baby who reliably sleeps for 3 hours at a time but at that age things change dramatically and quickly. They drop naps, they get mobile, they get into danger. Looking after them is a full time job.

They don't even have an attention span to sit in front of a screen for seven hours - not that you'd want them to!

I still have after school club for my seven year old even though I WFH as if I leave him to take a zoom call he will get thirsty and smash a glass or try to get something from a tall shelf! Babies and toddlers don't even have his level of critical thinking (which admittedly is low!)

And it's far better for him to have proper care, a chance to play with friends away from a screen and someone to watch out for the danger.

That's before you get into your job, how your colleagues will feel and how your work will suffer. Because, I'm afraid it will.

I know this doesn't help if you can't afford childcare but could you look at dropping days? Compress hours and share with a partner or friends? Or shift your hours to when your baby is asleep? Maybe even a loan? I would do anything to avoid doing two full time jobs at the same time.

I also did it in COVID. It pretty much broke me, and was only possible as at the time everyone was used to kids constantly interrupting calls. In this environment, no way. I've got a second DC around this age now, and have to cancel meetings when he's off sick as kids in the background are completely not seen as appropriate any more. Also you just can't focus on either thing fully and it's surprisingly stressful.