Company relocating. Move or resign?

[Welliesandpyjamas]

I’ve worked for this company for 8 years. Due to internal and external industry changes, the company is moving to a new location. It is further away from where I live, three times the travel time, and would mean leaving the house before my DD (13) leaves for her school bus. I also have an older teen DS who has struggled a huge amount over the last few years. He has ASD and ADHD, and now home educated online, which works better for him and we are now seeing he is in a much better place. He can be home alone but not constantly and likes the reassurance that I work nearby and can come home if he needs me. DH works further away and has to leave the house before 7.

I asked my employer if remote or hybrid working would be possible due to the new location being further than what was involved when I first took the job. It isn’t an enormous distance but if I was jobseeking now I would discount it immediately based on travel time.

I feel stuck between moving for the stability/continuity and resigning before the move and finding another job closer to home (or remote) for my children’s needs.

What do you think - move or resign?

It’s a very tricky job market at the moment in many sectors annd you’re obviously severely restricted if you have to work near to home. Unless you are ok financially with a gap that could stretch for months then I’d advise not to resign. Try and make it work in the short term while you look for a new job.

Have you thought about asking to change or reduce your hours by 20 mins every day so at least the issue about the time you need to leave is resolved? Then for your son, could you create a plan so he knows what to do in each possible situation so he is reassured about you working a bit further away?

With the current climate I wouldn’t be leaving my job. If the travel doesn’t work for you you need to find a new job first. A 30 minute commute is a dream, you may find there is nothing more suitable around.

It’s half an hour travel instead of ten minutes! That’s a totally normal commute.

dont resign if you don’t have significant savings or until you have a new job lined up. If you resign you won’t get benefits for five months as youre making yourself intentionally unemployed. Google it. It’s a long long time ro wait for money.

so I’d do as a pp suggested and put in a written request for flexible working due to childcare issues, one of whom is disabled. You could potentially ask to start later / finish later at home with the first or last hour day being worked from home?

As for your son liking you to be nearby, you still are.

Would reducing your hours by one hour a day ro cover the additional travel time be an option? That could also
mean that you can leave at the same time and return at the same time each day for the children - and you don’t even have to tell them the workplace has moved so they won’t know or get stressed?

You mention your ds likes the reassurance that you are nearby, but half an hour is not that far. How often have you had to go home to see him? Might you be able to use this as an opportunity to develop resilience. Would a quick phone call do instead? You could make a formal request to wfh/reduce hours but not sure small companies are able to be that flexible.

Realistically, how much other choice is there within 10 minutes of your house?

If you live in a city centre or right by an industrial estate perhaps lots but for many, there wouldn't be many options.

For a 30 minute drive I wouldn't give it up but you can explore other options and start applying.

If they won't do hybrid is there any slight change to your working hours that might help?

For all of 30 minutes I’d accept the move and get on with it especially in this job market

This really. When you said 3 times the commute I thought you meant 1.5 hrs v half an hour or something. Doesn’t sound like there’s any real reason why this wouldn’t work, it’s just not as convenient. What would be the chances of you getting something else within 10 mins from home?

Being in your car for an extra 40 minutes a day isn't life-changing. It's inconvenient and not ideal, but for me it wouldn't justify an upheaval like finding a new job and certainly not moving home. I'd accept it to keep a job I enjoyed.

Thanks for all the input.

I didn’t mention moving house anywhere so apologies to those who misunderstood the OP.

I also didn’t include the detail and backstory of my son’s situation, for privacy reasons and to try and keep the OP more concise! I don’t want to share any further details on here but I can assure you that a very careful balance is needed for our whole family at this time. We don’t want to mess things up after some awful years. We want to gently build up a stable future for him and retain a calm, close family environment. Yes, it’s a deliberately vague description but please trust me that it matters a lot. Therefore, whilst the travel times sounds insignificant to many people (and I did acknowledge this up the thread) and unfortunately made some of you mock me, it is an important consideration for this particular family at this time.

I can talk about stricter hours but know that the nature of the role and the industry means that it would be very difficult to maintain in reality. I also work with an emotionally immature young man who would definitely have something to say about anyone leaving at their official finish time when we are busy. Can’t face that 🙄

A change of job does actually appeal to me more this morning. Luckily, there are far more options for work closer to home. In fact, the current job location is right in the middle of a highly populated industrial area and I can see several suitable vacancies advertised currently. Other options include WFH jobs, and approaching companies even closer to home with my CV.

Thank you for all the advice, especially those who suggested important areas to consider. I think I just needed to voice my thoughts to stop my head spinning with this change (which I feel is being badly managed by my employer, no formal chats and only titbits of information being shared by different people).

You are being unreasonable giving up a job for 20 mins extra travel yes.

In this economy I wouldn’t leave without something to go to, but I would start job hunting.

It's always easier to get a job from a job so I'd get applying but hedge your bets and submit a flexible working request to reduce/change your hours slightly so you can maintain your current arrangements as much as possible.

This isn’t AIBU. That wasn’t my question.

If you think you’d get something suitable close to home, do that then, leave, and tell your current work why.