Being let go

[Angelinahyeeeeena]

I left (was let go from…) a small, demanding workplace after being told my performance wasn’t meeting expectations. It was a very close, competitive team and I often felt like the outsider. They would openly talk in a language I didn’t speak around me and I was never part of the small talk, team jokes or really anything. I also didn’t feel very good at the work after having been there several months but did pass probation.

At one point I overheard my manager comparing me unfavourably to a colleague, which completely undermined my confidence. From then on I felt under scrutiny and couldn’t seem to turn things around.

When I was let go, it was handled politely but left me feeling pitied rather than respected.

Now I’m struggling to tell whether I was genuinely underperforming or just not a fit for that culture… and how to rebuild confidence after something like this.

Has anyone experienced this and managed to move forward constructively?

Hopeful bump

Sounds like a cultural thing. Very unfair of them to talk in a language you don’t speak (unless you’re abroad).

Most of us get made redundant at least once in our life. Sorry it’s happened to you. Chalk it up to experience and move on.

Sorry to hear this @Angelinahyeeeeena , how long were you there for? Did they give any redundancy?

Thank you so much.

I was there for almost a year and got given a few weeks’ pay. They kept saying it was because of poor performance which I get (I don’t think it was excellent recently as the culture was really dragging me down) but equally less than two months’ ago, I was told there were areas that I need to improve but largely that I was working at my level!

I work in the UK but it’s a foreign company. By the end I was completely frozen out and they would invite me to lunch and then spend 90% of the time speaking in a mutual language which I didn’t speak.

Well it's not you then. Could you temp for a bit? That can be a great way to rebuild your confidence.

You clearly didn’t fit in and they should be ashamed for treating you so poorly!

You did nothing wrong.

I would pick myself up, hold my head up high and find a better paying job.

I got sacked (ie not just redundant) earlier this year. It really does knock confidence, and could does make you bitter!

OP it was absolutely not you. When you find a new job you will probably have a bit of imposter syndrome/trauma and expect people to suddenly start treating you badly. When they don't, you will realise that it was never you!

I’m sorry, have been in similar situations and it knocks your confidence but it will get better. Agree with taking a temp job or just another job with a better fit. More than anything, find somewhere with supportive culture (they do exist), as that will help you in the long run.

You were probably just used . Once you had served your purpose they came out with all
this bullshit to get rid of you .

Did you think about starting to learn the language?

Why on earth should OP have to learn another language? This is the UK and there is an expectation that English should be spoken in the workplace unless specified in the contract.

Put in a complaint to HR/ CEO with evidence of them deliberately excluding you.

Write an honest review about the company on Glassdoor.

If anyone broke any rules or anything, report them.

For rebuilding confidence- some sessions with a careers coach

I think from the way you’ve described it it’s clear discrimination and racism. Is there no one else the same culture as you works there, I assume not. Do you understand why they hired you?

id out it behind you.

Also recommend joining a Union and finding a good employment solicitor, in case you ever find yourself in a similar situation.
Good Luck!

I merely ask.

If one was to take up employment in an organisation run by (say) a French company and the majority of other staff were bilingual, it isn't beyond the bounds of credulity that making a small attempt to learn that language might be beneficial to one's career.

@Angelinahyeeeeena was it a job involving making sales ? I’ve worked many years ago in HR/office management and to be honest in those kind of environments if you aren’t making the numbers for whatever reason they find any excuse to let people go - because at the end of the day , not enough sales, not enough income in - regardless of how good you are in other aspects

I agree, clearly if she wasn’t making the numbers she had to go, but I think she’s know that and not write the thread as she did, so I’m not sure that’s what this is, as she’s saying she specifically was excluded so clearly the only employee not of this culture.