What was this meeting? (Manager and HR)

[Szerrm]

I have a new Manager of 6 months. I considered her ok, though I have felt uneasy in the last few months.

She invited me to a 121 1 hour meeting in the office (these are usually weekly video call 10 min meetings). This was at the end of last month.

A HR Manager was also in the meeting, she advised was there as simply visiting the office that day and was invited. (I didn't expect HR to be in attendance and was uncomfortable, alongside the unusual location and length of the meeting).

My Manager raised 2 issues, one being I was taking too long to do a piece of work -weekly task. I explained it was detailed hence the time and took this project as part of my workload, the person previously working on this project solely did this as their full-time role.

The other issue, it took me 30 minutes to respond to an email from Manager requesting documents. I replied that I believed 30 minutes to respond and supply the requested documents was acceptable.

These 2 issues were debated between myself and Manager. HR listened.

I did ask if this was a form of disciplinary and assured not.

I realise my Manager considers myself incompetent and dislikes me. I'm of the same opinion. Though we continue to work. The meeting hasn't been mentioned since. My Manager has mentioned to myself since I'm unlikely to meet my objectives this year.

I haven't had HR attend such a meeting before. Is this standard?

I expected a follow-up of the meeting, maybe a certain time I have to complete the one piece of work (though I can not complete it quicker). I'm more conscious of Managers requests and have been prioritising them (over other tasks I don't believe I should be but conscious of being reprimanded again).

I do feel she would like to push me out. I've been with the Company for 2 years, hadn't considered looking for a new role in current slow job market.

I feel embarrassed and surely my Manager must have had a conversation with her Manager about myself, as well as HR before this meeting. Though I don't understand why the meeting was held with no resolution.

Advice please (apologies for length but want to give backstory)

He he hee, thanks 😜

She doesn't need that pedantic crap on Mumsnet where she's not doing any of those things and when she's clearly upset and looking for advice. Spelling and grammar bores are the bane of this site.

My job doesn’t include that skill, never said it did 🙄

Weird your meetings are normally only 10 minutes if your performance is not as expected

Improving her written and spoken English is constructive advice. It could be part of the problem.

I never suggested it did either. But if you’re going to criticise the OP’s use of language, you shouldn’t be making basic mistakes yourself.

In what world do you think someone who needs grammar tips would ever be hired as a copywriter?

No. The poster was not wrong. She was 100% correct.

Wrong again.

It depends on the employers policies around being accompanied with another staff member/colleague/union rep.

To carte-blanche say that this isnt allowed is flat out wrong.

Document everything! I was put on a PIP by a new manager and in hindsight this person was brought in to do a job. For good measure they put my colleague on one too! They were identical in terms of the issues but slightly different examples! As if colleagues don’t confer! Eventually I was made redundant but they obvs wanted me to walk without it costing them anything! Put a grievance in and say it was underhand! That they should have been transparent with you!

This to me looks like the manager is trying to build a case against you

In a previous job a director wanted a manager out and we noticed that the CEO started attending the weekly team meeting. Soon after the manager was pushed out, it was like the director wanted to get the CEO on side

Not what I said. You don’t automatically have right to representation when your boss wants to talks to you.

Your advice was to refuse to attend a meeting if HR are present. It’s terrible advice.

"You don’t automatically have right to representation when your boss wants to talks to you."

In a formal 1-2-1 setting, most work places permit this. For you to handwave and dismiss that it doesnt happen is laughable as I have accompanied many colleagues in their 1-2-1s when asked.

"Your advice was to refuse to attend a meeting if HR are present. It’s terrible advice."

Wrong again - unless there was a formal invite to a formal meeting, then having HR in a meeting without agreement or forewarning or a justifiable reason, then an employee does have the right to refuse to participate and challenge it.

Again, I have seen this in umpteen workplaces - public and private sector. Just because you havent seen it doesnt mean it doesnt happen - because it does. 🙄

“I have the right to refuse to attend this meeting”. Yes. You have the right to piss in your car footwell as well, it’s still a terrible idea.

I didn’t say it doesn’t happen with TU reps - I said it’s not an automatic right. Which is correct.

You dont even know what you are arguing for or against.

Lost cause.

I work in HR.

Having HR casually "drop-in" to a meeting is not standard practice, and I would decline any request from a manager for me to drop into a 1-to-1 meeting unannounced. As soon as HR are involved in a meeting the risk is the meeting becomes formal, even if you don't want it to.

I would expect to attend such a meeting if the relationship between manager and employee was deteriorating, which it sounds like yours could be, or if performance management discussions were beginning, which if you're being told you're not meeting objectives might also be true. I would never attend the meeting unannounced to "observe" quietly in the background or surreptitiously observe and it would be clear to employee from the outset if I was going to be attending.

This suggests to me that either your manager doesn't know what they are doing or HR doesn't know what they are doing, possibly both. You could raise a grievance of you feel very strongly about it but in my opinion, this shouldnt be happening.

@IAmClemFandango

Hats off to you and thank you for validating the points that I was making earlier about HR attending standard 1-2-1 meetings. 👍

God, imagine this being the hill you die on. 🙃

Hope being validated by another poster has made you feel warm and fuzzy inside.

“Mentioned to ME”

✅ Correct Uses of “Myself”1. Reflexive Pronoun
Used when the subject and object of the sentence refer to the same person.

• I burned myself on the stove.
• I can imagine myself living in New York.

2. Intensive Pronoun Used to emphasize the subject (can usually be removed without changing the meaning).

• I, myself, was responsible for the design.
• I made the cake myself.

3. Fixed Phrases / Expressions Used in certain idiomatic expressions.

• I was by myself.
• I did it all by myself.

Your manager sounds a bit nuts op.
Do you have a union?

I'd rather die on the right hill than wrong one.

Many thanks for your unkind and off topic comment that added so little to the thread at hand. 👍

”Copywriting” describes a specific role. “Copy writing” can refer to the general writing of “copy” that may or may not make up a specific overall role for the OP in “copywriting”. So, I’m not sure the author of the post did anything wrong there 🙂

Why come on a nearly 7 month old thread to say that 😅

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