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Original poster

Stressed team member - how to approach

3 replies

shuffleofftobuffalo · 18/10/2025 08:33

Interested in different perspectives on this if I may.

One of my team is off with work related stress - short term so far, certified by GP. No declared disabilities if that makes a difference. One big issue is that they won’t engage with me (or anyone else at work) just now.

I know workplace stress builds over time (I’ve personally experience) but they have never indicated there is an issue. Weekly 1-1s (their engagement in these has not been the best, I ask them all to bring a list for discussion and they never do and tell me everything is fine when asked about wellbeing) not the strongest performer in the team but newer and bedding in well quality of work wise, has had regular positive and constructive feedback and support to develop into the role.

There seem to be some interpersonal difficulties, they’re quick to take against others in the team so I think they may have isolated themselves a bit.

Any advice/perspectives? I’m ready to support them but of course that’s impossible if they won’t engage.

OP posts:
Silverbirchleaf · 18/10/2025 09:14

Does your company have a wellbeing package that offers counselling? You could offer them this?

Original poster
shuffleofftobuffalo · 18/10/2025 10:12

Yes we do, more than one, they’ve been offered that already (and we regularly make staff aware of it anyway).

OP posts:
HelplessSoul · 18/10/2025 13:36

shuffleofftobuffalo · 18/10/2025 08:33

Interested in different perspectives on this if I may.

One of my team is off with work related stress - short term so far, certified by GP. No declared disabilities if that makes a difference. One big issue is that they won’t engage with me (or anyone else at work) just now.

I know workplace stress builds over time (I’ve personally experience) but they have never indicated there is an issue. Weekly 1-1s (their engagement in these has not been the best, I ask them all to bring a list for discussion and they never do and tell me everything is fine when asked about wellbeing) not the strongest performer in the team but newer and bedding in well quality of work wise, has had regular positive and constructive feedback and support to develop into the role.

There seem to be some interpersonal difficulties, they’re quick to take against others in the team so I think they may have isolated themselves a bit.

Any advice/perspectives? I’m ready to support them but of course that’s impossible if they won’t engage.

Very telling that they wont engage with you.

Most places of employment would see that as insubordination and grounds for dismissal. No wonder they've played the bullshit "stress at work" charade.

Just because someone is competent at their job doesnt mean they get a pass on doing things like 1-2-1s etc - you need to document everything this lazy employee fails to do for these meetings - explain they are part of the job and non-negotiable.

If they fail to do that, then start the process to manage them out. The fact they are pissing off others in the team means that toxicity also needs to be stamped out.

You deal with this firmly, but with evidence - or you will be stuck with an asshole of an employee that no one likes. My advice is to move swiftly and get them sacked.

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