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Malicious grievance against me

131 replies

DandelionPockets · 17/10/2025 22:59

Hi all - looking for advice or solidarity because I'm really being put through it atm.

I manage a team of 5 in the transport industry, I've done this job for 6 years with a break in the middle for mat-leave. When I returned from mat-leave they had hired a new person. She has been a consistently poor performer (never answering emails or messages, never updating the internal database, ignoring supplier calls, asking other people to do her work. Some days it seems like she does about 30minutes of work all day. Constant escalations to me from colleagues because her not doing work has led to them not being able to do their jobs).

The person has protected characteristics and along with HR we documented reasonable adjustments we would make and I support these. I also document our 1:1s on email and give consistent feedback on expectations and performance. I ask her about each of those things she hasn't done in the 1:1s and ask her to do them by the next week's 1:1 and sometimes they are not done even after that.

So after 3 months of this I spoke with HR and my line manager to say we need to do a capability review, everyone agrees. We do the capability review and the outcome is a PIP with clear objectives. No formal warning as advised by our lawyers. She has 6 weeks to show she has improved before the next review. She brings a union rep who is extremely argumentative during the meeting, but myself and the HR manager do well.

After the capability hearing there is a flurry of emails from the employee to the Head of HR. One is a grievance against the HR manager, one is a grievance against me, a whole new list of adjustments they require (some are very very unreasonable). Quite stressful for me but I'm assured by HR and my line manager i've followed process perfectly and been a supportive line manager. All I know is that the grievance states that I have not been supportive of their protected characteristics and harassing them as I have not cancelled our scheduled 1:1 for next week and have been unfair in not giving more of a chance to improve outside of a formal process.

My manager and Head of HR are meeting with the employee next week to talk about the grievance against me as per the policy which I know means they need to treat it seriously even though it does make me feel uneasy as I've never ever had a direct report complain about me before.

So my questions are:

  1. I should ask for details of the grievance and the minutes from the meeting where she outlines her complaint and evidence?
  2. The grievance is likely to not be upheld as I haven't done anything wrong and it's a direct ploy to stop the formal PIP. Should I send a counter grievance following the outcome to say it was malicious?
  3. Should I make sure to have a formal meeting with HR and my line manager to give my evidence/side of things. Should I start gathering evidence and witness statements myself?

I just want to make sure that I'm not being ridiculous but also standing up for myself with all this.

Thank you

OP posts:
shuffleofftobuffalo · 18/10/2025 08:15

I think people can forget that the purpose of reasonable adjustments is not to give the employee free rein to do what they like and/or underperform, it’s to remove barriers that prevent them from performing well. They still have to do the job.

The employee also needs to help themselves - for instance I can’t make them make a to do list every day if that’s what they need, they have to take that step themselves. When they make the list I can help them prioritise though, that might be the adjustment - what do you think you need to do this week and I’ll help with what you actually need to do from that list. An adjustment that involves them being allowed to be a poor performer is highly unlikely to pass the test of being reasonable. I have had more than one person ask effectively for that.

Some people will just use all the processes to throw back at you when they have poor performance highlighted. It’s really unpleasant but they put more effort into fighting back than actually solving the problem. Make sure you have a formal meeting with HR. They will have seen this all before.

DandelionPockets · 18/10/2025 08:32

@shuffleofftobuffalo thank you. You raise some really interesting points and I do think it's slipped into that territory now. The new adjustments she has requested are things that effectively mean she is not able to do the job without me having to do a lot of it for her (or someone else on the team).

The basis of the grievance seems to be around these not being put in place for her already, but she has not requested them before and they are unreasonable so wouldn't be agreed to anyway.

OP posts:
Iwanttoliveinagardencentre · 18/10/2025 09:03

If you had been talking about a male employee I would have thought you were talking about the very same person who did exactly this to me.

It was a waking nightmare and despite professing their support my employer was utterly spineless in standing up to what was in effect workplace bullying.

My perpetrator was a person in a team managed by one of my colleagues and this colleague was in tears at the prospect of having to hold a meeting with him to discuss him bullying someone else on the same grade as him in her team so I was asked to run the meeting with her as support.

At the meeting she wimped out and said nothing so I had to say all the things which needed to be said.

He was furious and so made me his next target.

He an ex union rep (ex because they had sacked him because he was such a trouble maker) and knew every technicality you could imagine.

He had previously been disciplined for bullying the manager before me.

My employer let him tie them in knots and in the meanwhile I was living in limbo.
It took almost a year and in that time my mental health completely broke down.

I went from a strong manager who had always had excellent feedback from above and below to someone who couldn’t leave my home.

The bully was emboldened by my employers weakness and went further and further until he was actually following me about my workplace and encouraging others to make complaints about me.

I had silent phone calls at home and my tyres were punctured.

During this period it came to light that he had been charged with harassment of an ex partner and had been due in court but he had persuaded the ex partner to drop the charges.

Eventually his grievance was not upheld and he was told he had no evidence at all for his accusations.

He then took out a grievance against the person who heard that grievance and went off sick with stress.

He was never held to account because my employer had a policy of not disciplining someone on the back of a grievance.

Clearly this policy had not properly considered the use of the grievance system to bully by means of vexatious claims.

Eventually he was found to be moonlighting in another job whilst claiming sick pay from my employer but was given the opportunity to resign instead of being sacked.

He resigned and so is probably out there now making other people’s lives a misery.

The only lucky thing for me was that I was in a union. They were fantastic.

We brought a case against my employer for personal injury which eventually (six years!) settled out of court.

My advice to you is document everything.

Get anything people say to you in writing from them (eg people who say they will speak in your support etc) or it means nothing. Time drags on and people change their minds about sticking their neck out or forget details.

Trust nobody. It is amazing how little integrity people have if they feel standing up might be in any way detrimental to themselves.

Have an exit plan and, if you can, think about getting as far away as possible if this shows any hint of turning to an utter shit show like mine.

Words · 18/10/2025 09:05

If only these people put as much effort into doing their job in the first place as they do into invoking these spurious complaints...

I had one underperforming member of staff claim I had accused her of lying ( of course I had done no such thing) , and that as telling lies was against her religion I was being racist. These things can get very messy. Happily in my case the situation résolved before formal action was required.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 18/10/2025 10:29

She will be off on stress leave very soon on.
one of my higher up managers told me there is a pattern with underperformers- as soon as you address it they complaint about their manager and then go on stress leave themself

Viviennemary · 18/10/2025 10:33

She should be dismissed. Nothing but a troublemaker and waste of space. Let her take the firm to a tribunal. These types make me mad. Selfish entitled spiteful and out for what she can screw out of any system.

CantHoldMeDown · 18/10/2025 10:45

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This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

CantHoldMeDown · 18/10/2025 10:50

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This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

rainbowstardrops · 18/10/2025 11:02

I have nothing else to add but just to say I’m sorry you’re being put through this. You sound like a very fair manager.

bakebeans · 18/10/2025 11:15

Puskiesauce · 17/10/2025 23:09

Union rep here.

  1. No. They'll come to you for your side of the grievance facts. And yes, they do have to take it seriously.
  2. No. You'll just look petty (and they're already on a PIP).
  3. Yes to getting your facts straight but your work will tell you when the meeting is. They'll ask you questions then.
  4. Join a union in case of any future issues. You've seen how hard they fight for their members.

Unfortunately I am going through a similar thing and my union has advised it’s not something they deal with despite being with them for several years and prior to these events

DandelionPockets · 18/10/2025 11:21

@Iwanttoliveinagardencentre so sorry you've been through such a horrible time, it all sounds incredibly distressing. Will definitely take your advice to ensure all is documented and to protect myself should it turn nastier.

OP posts:
DandelionPockets · 18/10/2025 11:23

@CantHoldMeDown thank you for explaining. Feeling better for knowing more about how the process works and what potential next steps are.

OP posts:
DandelionPockets · 18/10/2025 11:24

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 18/10/2025 10:29

She will be off on stress leave very soon on.
one of my higher up managers told me there is a pattern with underperformers- as soon as you address it they complaint about their manager and then go on stress leave themself

I believe she will take stress leave once the grievance process is completed and the PIP starts again as she has stated already in the formal letter to HR that she is too stressed to undertake her role at the moment.

OP posts:
Florencesndzebedee · 18/10/2025 11:27

I would gather all documents, notes of conversations, emails etc just in case you face an employment tribunal in the future with this person.

Bonden · 18/10/2025 11:28

You’ve had good advice here. I can only add that The investigation will judge “on the balance of probability” whether her version/allegations are right. So it’s not about proving 100% (although that’s always great if possible) but being 1% more likely to be right than her. Good luck

Coffeetime25 · 18/10/2025 11:29

DandelionPockets · 17/10/2025 23:32

Gosh you're right, made it clear as mud. They have ADHD.

that was my first thought to and they are obviously young by the sounds of things

Thundertoast · 18/10/2025 11:32

So sorry you are going through this. Agree with others, get your evidence in order and aim to make it really easy to follow and refer to. I found when something similar happened to me (no formal grievance) that a spreadsheet worked great.
12/04/2025 Employee emailed asking for adjustments (see attached email labelled email 1)
3/05/2025 meeting took place to discuss (see attached email invite 1 and notes from meeting that were sent out after by email labelled emailed 2)
4/05/2025 x employee reported that employee had not completed their work therefore holding up customer delivery.

Etc etc. Time consuming, and it can sometimes be easier in Word, but you want a chronological timeline that makes it easy for anyone to follow.

ChimpanzeeThatMonkeyNews · 18/10/2025 11:37

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This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Exactly.

skyeisthelimit · 18/10/2025 11:46

This is where the world has gone mad. If this person isn't capable of doing the job then they shouldn't be there. DD has ADHD and wouldn't take on certain jobs that she knows she can't do. As a Dyslexic she can ask for yellow paper, screen filters etc as reasonable adjustments. We know what is a sensible adjustment and what isn't. Not doing your job, or expecting somebody else to do your job, or keep reminding you to do things, isn't reasonable.

Something else that also seems to be common in a certain generation is objecting to being told what to do, or being told off. So if they are criticised on anything, or told they are doing things wrong, they will flounce off, saying that they won't be spoken to like that. They either walk out, or take time off with stress.

Seelybee · 18/10/2025 12:13

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This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

@DandelionPockets this.
Standard tactic, blatantly manipulative. From the sounds of it you've completely covered yourself in terms of your actions and everything is documented.
This is essentially vexatious complaining and should be easy to shut down.
Hopefully HR can expedite the exit of this individual; protected characteristics don't protect from dismissal if they can't/won't do the job they're paid for despite everyone bending over backwards to accommodate.
Try not to worry. What goes round comes around.

TheEllisGreyMethod · 18/10/2025 12:14

No advice op but here for support. Myself and 3 of my colleagues have currently been subject to a malicious grievance under similar circumstances. Ive found it stressful.

DandelionPockets · 18/10/2025 12:20

@Thundertoast thank you for this great advice. One thing go can certainly do is write a very detailed timeline of events - already have a lot of notes so will set time aside next week to have it thoroughly sorted.

OP posts:
DandelionPockets · 18/10/2025 12:27

@Seelybee thank you. All these words of reassurance has made me feel so much better and prepared.

OP posts:
Unexpectedlysinglemum · 18/10/2025 12:47

I think you’ve done everything you can. You have inspired me to take more and better notes as a manager too!

weegielass · 18/10/2025 12:59

Playing devil's advocate here:

what are the adjustments she has in place? How conistently are they being applied - are you sure? What is she now requesting and why do you percieve them as unreasonale? Do you know the definition of reasonable in the equallity act? What awareness training have you had? Any training specific to ADHD? If none, then how do you know what's reasonable? That's for a tribunal to determine as the definition of disability in the equality act is legal not medical.

How you answer these questions will be telling on how well you've handled this.

I'm speaking as someone who was a disability union rep and who also has a disability - I won an employment tribunal because adjustments were refused and others not consistently made, requests for staff training were denied. HR were adament policies and processes were followed only to look like fools in tribunal.

be prepared for a long process of grievance, appeal (could be several stages of appeal depending on where you work), ACAS conciliation, tribunal.

HR protect the business, they don't protect the employees, don't trust them. if you're not in a union, that was a mistake, and probably too late now.

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