Solicitors and Teacher Mums (of 2+ kids!)

[wanderandwonder]

Hi! Please bear with me because this post might get a bit complex and convoluted, but I would really appreciate some guidance, wisdom and insight, as I am struggling with clarity right now.

For background, I have recently qualified as a solicitor (I will have dual qualification for England and Wales, and the British territory in which I currently live). It has been a very confusing journey, as I have studied (LPC part time online over 2 years) and undertaken my TC full time all whilst raising two small children, one of whom I was newly expecting when I signed up to the LPC. He is now 3! The older one is 5.

This has been a “career change” (albeit it was a very short “career”!) from teaching. I did an in-school teacher training programme alongside the PGCE, and hold QTS, but I never did the second year. I taught English for a year at a Secondary school in the South East of England, before moving my life to my now-husband’s continent, where I taught English as a foreign language in schools. I should say that I always found teaching deeply satisfying.

The transition to law (I’d studied the GDL after my undergraduate degree- and hated it!) was essentially out of necessity when we relocated to our current home. Teaching posts- especially full time and indefinite contracts - are few and far between, if not total unicorns! I had to find employment to sponsor my husband’s visa.

I fell into law. I work at a commercial firm, with a high focus on private client work. I started in Tax, did some Wills and Probate, did a seat in Litigation doing Family, Employment and Personal Injury (bear in mind this jurisdiction, whilst sometimes looks to the UK, is its own beast). I have found the work- with the exception of the Litigation work, which I did enjoy- unfulfilling, out of alignment with my values and meaningless, quite frankly. I am currently in a team that does a mixture of regulatory, commercial and private client work. I haven’t been able to pursue Litigation due to the politics of the firm, and I was told by my (female and a mother!) supervising Partner, that the work was not family friendly.

I feel a lot of existential angst to make decisions about the direction in which to take my career. It is especially pressing because:

1. We plan to grow our family and have a third baby (sooner rather than later to avoid more stopping and starting in my “career”, which hasn’t even taken off!)
2. We plan to relocate to the UK- hopefully a more affordable, green and pleasant part

I can’t seem to square the circle or organise all the moving parts. I’m looking for:

• A meaningful career that fuses my skill set, passions and values
• “Family friendly” full time work
• important to note, I am the one with the higher earning potential and a comfortable salary to support a family of 5 is necessary!!)

I know I haven’t given Law much of a chance, and that there are innumerable iterations out there, but I can’t help but feel pulled back to teaching. I think both professions have their pros and cons, and I recognise that, in choosing to have another child and exerting financial pressure on the family, I have to work hard and put the hours in.

I would really appreciate any solicitor mums and teacher mums out there to offer some thoughts, especially if you have 3+ children!

Thank you!

I’m not sure the billable hours culture in law firms, especially any big and corporate enough to pay a wage that’s would comfortably support a family of 5 is particularly likely to be “family friendly” in the classic sense of the phrase. I’d imagine teaching may fare slight better if you can push through the term time slog to the holidays, but given teachers seem to the leaving the profession in droves, I don’t think it’s plain sailing there either.

Ultimately I think you have to make the best of the situation you’re in and be as realistic as you can that there are very few well paid, professionally fulfilling jobs that will enable to you be there for every school drop-off/pick-up / school play etc without some major compromises. Not trying to be negative at all; but finding the balance isn’t easy. I worked full time in an international law firm after DD was born and just felt I was missing too much of her childhood and took a period off as a SAHM, had a second child and now am 5 years older realising that the world has moved on, none of my experience is relevant any more 😂 and the fear of starting over is very real. That said, you don’t get the early years back, so no (major!) regrets here but I don’t know many people at any point on the spectrum who can properly do it all at the same time so you have to be flexible and prioritise and preferably have a back up plan when it all goes tits up on a Monday morning!

Lawyer here and I’ve done a lot of teaching in a past life overseas. You are very unlikely to find the holy grail of meaningful and fulfilling job which pays well and allows flexibility around a young family, thats just the reality for most people so my advice would be to think about what matters most to you - is it flexible hours to spend time with your kids (in which case teaching is by far
going to be better than law as you’ll work hard but have school holidays etc at least), is it money to provide for 3 kids (then law, private practice or in house in finance or a good corporate role) or meaningful work (teaching or law, but not the well paying kind of law!) You don’t say what your DH does but could he pick up the slack on childcare? I have two kids and no family help but as I am the higher earner my DH is the one to take time off if kids are sick, leave work early in emergencies more often than me etc. My job pays extremely well but I would not be able to do it if I had to be the one fitting work around children as it’s often long hours and inflexible. It is not at all meaningful (helping people and companies who already have a lot of money make more money essentially) but I do find it interesting and fulfilling and since we have no family money on either side, I decided early on that making money was the priority for me. I do prioritise seeing my kids to the extent possible during the week (come home for bedtime and log on later), and I’m at a point in my career now where I don’t usually have to work weekends so spend all weekend with them, it’s never enough time but it’s the best of all the available options, for us, at this point in time.

Lawyer here and have a good friend who quit law to be a teacher. Money buys you options. High salaries mean good schooling, great holidays, quality time together. Also help with uni fees and house deposits etc. From what I can see hours day to day are equally high for teaching and the law but teachers do get the holidays but pay is much much worse. In your shoes I’d get more years under my belt at a firm and then move in-house for flexibility once you have some experience to make you more attractive and better paid by a company.