New employee (Gen Z} doesn’t want to meet in person

[outofofficeon]

I took on a graduate for a new position, she’d been job hunting for a few years, I felt good about giving her a hand up into a great career.
She lives about an hour away so works remotely. She bright and polite and reliable and a good member of the team.

The problem I have is that she doesn’t want to visit the office in person or meet her colleagues in person, I offered to put her up in a nice hotel and pay travel costs so that she could spend a few days with us in person. She declined. My latest issue is that she doesn’t put her camera on when we are communicating at work as part of daily work or chats. I understand she might not be very confident but I think that you have to get out of the house / your comfort zone if you want a career.

im not sure what to do- any advice oh wise ladies.

I think this is good advice. Arrange a meeting with her - a one on one as a catch up and check in and then ask her about it. I think it’s reasonable to say that while you understand there will be moments she has her camera switched off that the expectation is she should have her camera on for meetings.

If she does have a probation period/meeting due though, I’d be inclined to work with her to create an action plan.

The cameras on thing is very important in my business too, with her not naturally doing it I think you're going to have to announce to the team that its now mandatory. I think it makes a massive difference being able to see each other when working remotely.

Is there any travel expected for the role? If so she could be expected to travel to the offfice.

I don't think the contract has to specify every detail of the working environment. I think you are perfectly within your rights to say team policy is cameras on during meetings.

As to the question of coming into the office, I would address the issue (that it affects the dynamic of the team, and her personal chances of advancement) rather than your perceived solution (spend more time in the office). If it's not in the contract you can still address it through her annual performance process. Talk to her about the behaviours you expect to see and give her some targets designed to promote those behaviours.

Also try to find out why she is resistant to the camera and attendance in person. She may not tell you the real reason, but it shows you care about her.

I also find the “cameras must be on, otherwise it’s rude” comments odd. Maybe I’m just old, but Zoom/Teams are fairly new in the workplace. 10 years ago we had conference calls on…shocker…landline phones and somehow everyone survived and the jobs got done.

...and now you know why she's been job hunting for years.

I don’t mind the camera off myself, I do anything to avoid zoom/team meetings

Yes, but presumably you didn’t only correspond with your internal team by landline? It’s so hard to have a working relationship with someone you’ve never met, let alone see when you speak to them.

Did you meet her for interview? Perhaps she has commitments at home that means she can't just up and leave. It could be a child but equally a partner, elderly relative or even a pet.

It could also just be ASD. I hate having to deal with people in offices or for them to see me on a camera. I note it hasn't affected her ability to do her job. I'd be politely enquiring why as to both office visits and having a camera on. If it makes her feel uncomfortable and she has a diagnosis (even self-diagnosed), I'd be explaining to my team that she just doesn't have her camera on. It's a reasonable adjustment to ask to leave it off.

do you have a code of conduct?
or 'best practice' guide for video calls?

ours clearly states that cameras need to be on for calls, at least for intro and whilst speaking. we are advised to blur our background but not allowed face enhancing features (disabled in company system)

Are you sure she is who she says she is!?

I know this is an out there question but has ANYONE met her in person?

There is a lot of identity fraud going on with online jobs at the moment, particularly in IT related jobs.

https://cybersecuritynews.com/remote-it-worker-fraud-scheme/

Theres been a big issue with this in both the UK and US (My husband's firm has been targetted so I know its actually a big issue).

If no one has met this girl, I would be concerned for security reasons.

The gap in employment history is actually a potential red flag here too if no one has ever met her.

I would be concerned and there's legitimate grounds here to insist on turning on the camera.

No cameras on is my bugbear. Always the same people who never contribute to discussions and try everything to get out of in person meetings.

We ended up asking the service director to send an email clarifying that cameras must be on in all meetings as the despite being asked several times certain individuals didn't think those rules applied to them.

It's weird they can talk the talk at the interview then suddenly have a whole plethora of mental health problems 5 minutes after being employed.

And you also has f2f meetings as you were in the office 5 days a week. In my experience people with cameras off contribute fuck all and might as not be there.

Probation period set expectations
camera on
Visit office in person every 8 week
shadow a colleague in person

you can performance manage her if expectations aren’t met
and she can be dismissed in first 2 year

Good sdvice

Regarding the office attendance I think all you can do is highlight the benefits. When I started out I genuinely feel I gained a lot from going into the office and hearing how more established colleagues handled difficult conversations on the phone etc.

If she’s still reluctant, ask directly if there’s a reason she doesn’t want to come in. She could have caring responsibilities or need a workplace adjustment. I’ve had team members give all manner of reasons for feeling uncomfortable coming into the office and most could be overcome.

If she simply doesn’t want to come in then you could suggest a variation to the contract but she would need to agree to it.

Regarding the camera situation I would send an email and then reinforce the expectation in your next meeting with her.

Credit to ChatGPT for this: “I hope you’re doing well. I wanted to touch base about our team meetings. Having cameras on during calls really helps create a sense of connection, it makes conversations feel more engaging, inclusive, and accessible for everyone involved. Being able to see one another helps us collaborate more effectively and strengthens our team dynamic.

If you’re ever uncomfortable sharing your home environment, please feel free to use a virtual background, it’s a great way to stay visible while keeping things private.

Thank you for helping make our meetings as collaborative and inclusive as possible. Your presence and engagement make a big difference to the team.”

You could use National Inclusion Week (wc 15 Sept) to reinforce your commitment to making sure your meetings are as inclusive as possible and start meetings by outlining expectations

1. Cameras on to help those who are lip reading etc
2. Raise virtual hands to avoid speaking over each other and make sure everyone has the chance to be heard
3. Highlight closed captions option and chat facility
4. Ask colleagues to state preferred pronouns when introducing themselves (not necessarily relevant for internal team meetings)

Have you ever met her OP? Do you have any proof she is who she says she is?

You have a duty of care to her which should include visiting her to make sure that her homeworking set up is appropriate and not likely to cause injury. You may need to provide appropriate equipment (wrist rests, foot rest etc). Assuming you've not done that yet, it would be interesting to see her response to a planned visit would be. I don't think it would be unreasonable to expect her to travel to the office for a progress/performance meeting.

Conference calls were never satisfactory though...always someone sitting too far away from the microphone, two or more people trying to speak at the same time because you can't see anyone, or not knowing who is speaking because they were just a disembodied voice.

"When the eyes say one thing, and the tongue another, a practiced man relies on the language of the first." Ralph Waldo Emerson.

There's none of this if the camera's off. Visual cues and facial expression are an essential part of communication.

I'm going to take a different viewpoint here.

Does her work get done in a timely manner?
Is her work to the required standard?
Is she liaising with people by email/phone/preferred communication where that is necessary to get things done?

If there is nothing wrong then why does she need to be in the office or have her camera on? Presumably she's doing what she's being paid to do, and whilst it may be a little unusual to not actually physically see or work with colleagues, if the job is being done, it doesn't actually matter.

In case it's not been mentioned re camera -
Most apps allow camera on for others but turned off for yourself, to reduce that whole staring at yourself all day thing which is unsettling.

Gosh this view surprises me. In NHS we just didn't get a choice to have cameras on during the majority of a meeting. It was just the departmental rule and there wasnt any choice. I get that she is a remote worker but surely this is taking remote to a new level particularly at a graduate level. Surely at this level you do what you managers asks of you ? As no disabilities were indicated at interview I am struggling to understand why she just cant be mandated to participate fully in meetings.

I'm going to go against the majority here.

My thoughts are: yes, it's not "fun" to talk to a blank screen. But 20 years ago we didn't have video, and relied solely upon telephones to deliver information and collaborate at a distance. How does the use of a camera change anything? If its because "it's just nice to see a face" - that's your own personal preference and not a business or communication need. If its because "well, I like to see body language and reactions" not everyone demonstrates those things in person/real life anyway, e.g. some neurodivergent people. Again, this isn't a business need.

Honestly, if SHE is happy to not meet people in person and it isn't impacting her ability to perform her usual work duties, nothing else matters. Comments from colleagues suggesting she is "distant" would likely still occur if she was office based anyway. Not all of us are social butterflies. I regularly snub colleagues and stick on noise cancelling headphones, and swerve christmas parties because they're not for me. I don't really understood the preoccupation (usually of the older generation) to be determined to foster "nice social working spaces" usually by limiting work from home and personal freedoms in the hope that lumping various people together will result in harmony. It doesn't, and never will unfortunately!