Joined a new team and I can't get a word in during meetings. Advice please!

[notallthosewhotravelarelost]

I moved to a new team three weeks ago, although I've worked closely with the team lead for years. It's him, two project men and myself. The team lead is new to managing.

We've had a few team meetings now which are chaotic and its really hard to contribute. One of the team is a typical mansplainer who really annoys me. He interrupts and talks over everyone. It feels like he dominates meeting and talks 75% of the time.

I raised this with the team lead last week and said I was finding it hard. He basically said the mansplainer has some stuff going on and he won't tell him to be quiet. It feels like I, as the only woman on the team, am being told to suck it up. I'm just not willing to do this. I'm a strategy person brought in for a reason and I will not compromise my ability to do my job.

I've used a variety of techniques so far - telling mansplainer he is off topic and we need to come back to his point, raising a hand etc but I am dreading tomorrow's team meeting.

Any advice before I lose it?

Are your meetings online or in person op?

Is the agenda tightly written and focused? If so can you ensure that your views are required, for example with an agenda point, and enforce that?

Ah, 3 weeks is really early days. You’ve already told both the mouthy guy and the new manager what they’re doing wrong. You don’t have to go in all guns blazing. A bit of watching and listening and building relationships won’t be wasted time.

Meetings are in person. They have an agenda but our team lead is not great at pulling people back to it. I suggested to him that we try a rotating chair so he can focus on the strategic elements.

@Pumpkintopf I will add a point to tomorrow's agenda as I was at a 2 day workshop this week so can update on that. The workshop is part of the reason I'm so fed up. It was a very respectful environment where I got to contribute and ask questions which was a stark contrast to my normal working environment.

@HeddaGarbled I see your point and am torn in how to approach things. This is a new team so I appreciate this will take a while to settle. But mouthy guy has form and I'm starting off cross with him for previous unprofessional and disrespectful behaviour.

I have been running a workshop/community for practice for about 2 years. He has repeatedly taken credit for a project I initiated in front of the large group. About six months ago I booked him to present at this group and he did not show up or contact me to apologise. He's 60's and comes from a very male dominated area so I feel I need some boundaries.