To go back to an office full time when you have young children?

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So I have just survived a redundancy round. However my salary has been cut from £41k to £35k and the work has tripled so I started looking for a new job. I currently work fully remotely, with a 3yo DD and it's great - extremely flexible, except for the impending changes in my role which come into effect in the next few weeks. I took this role on 18 months ago, and prior to that I worked for the NHS which was in person 5 days a week, so massively different.

I have just been offered another role, 5 days a week in an office 10 min away from me 9:30-430pm on £55k which would obviously be a great jump for me. It's also quite an exciting position.. but then the mum guilt kicked in, thinking once she starts school she will be going to after school club 5 days a week. (DH works retail and his hours are stupid).

I don't know what to do.. if I should hold off, wait for something more flexible, for DD's sake. But then I actually don't love WFH all the time, I find it demotivating, I have put on an awful lot of weight and I never see anyone. I actually think I'm just looking for someone to say you're going to be fine, DD is going to be fine.. make the jump.

Go for the job, the hours sound good and extra money is always fun. Millions of children survive having two working parents.

Does your husband suffer from Dad-guilt for working stupid hours? (if so, then he needs a new job too)

That sounds brilliant, you will be able to do morning drop-offs and be back before 5, go for it!

So she'll be in childcare 9:15 to 4:45, ish? That's less than lots of three year olds and why nurseries are generally open 8-6. I think it's REALLY important to have a fulfilling career, plus the extra money sounds great.

Take the job! You and your dc will be fine!

I think those hours are perfectly do-able with a school age child. It's not long in after school club either.

Ahh thank you everyone. I really needed to hear that!

The irony is, when I was in the NHS she was in childcare from 7am - 6pm and I didn't really feel bad about it, because we had no other choice. I think now because she can say to me 'please don't make me go mummy' it's like a dagger 🙃

But seeing her mum and dad both working is something I want for her, and if you want the nice things in life you have to work for them..

Can you tell I'm going in circles?

Working from home full time has been a thing for barely than five years. Before then, parents just got on with it.

Who knows how long it will be a thing for. Take the office job.

Take it.

You'd be mad not to.

I’d take the well paid office job. That’s much better pay and a local, well paid job.

4.45pm is a good pick up time for after school wraparound care.

Would come up with as good plans as possible to cover school holidays. DH and I used temporary nannies and split our annual leave.

Take the job, it sounds brilliant and will be great for you. “Mum guilt” is a ridiculous term created by society to hold women back. Does your partner have “dad guilt” about going to work?

I don't understand why you wouldn't take this.

Take it! I assume on the mornings / afternoons your dh isn’t working, he can do school drop off / pick up.

Congrats on the new job by the way! It sounds perfect.

Go for the job.

I work 8-4.30 Monday to Friday. My kids go to wrap around every day and they enjoy it. The mum guilt is real but I wouldn't pass up a salary like that. (Mine is £30k a year!)

Thank you everyone - I'm going to take it! For the first time since having her I am actually really excited about getting back to a job I will enjoy doing. I will just make the most of our weekends together.

So happy to read your update. You sound like a very sensible mum!

I would absolutely not swap a remote job for a full time office job (especially if you have children).You would be better off finding a better paid remote job with an option to go in from time to time if that’s what you want. Despite what you hear on mumsnet, there are many remote jobs still.

I was working part time three days a week and wanted to stay that way. The right job came up but it was full time and I agonised but went for it. It was hybrid with 3 days in. It was actually fine and manageable but about a year in there was some restructuring and I asked if I could go to four days. They agreed and I now feel I have the perfect balance. With your jump in salary this might be something to consider? It does make the school holidays 20% easier to manage and life in general.

I don’t think I’d do it at full time ie 9-5, but at 9.30-4.30 and ten minutes away that’s amazing. You could always look into using a childminder for after school pick up in the younger years if the after school club seems a bit tiring/big/scary for DC at first.

Pick a school with good after school care. DH and I get firmly told off if we pick DD up 'too early' from after school club! They will definitely be fine.

But the OP has said she is ready for a change from remote working. Being only 10 mins from home is nothing commute-wise, and you get all the benefits of being in an office. I have a 20 min commute and it's so easy, there's no way I'd look to trade that for a remote role.