Advice please.

[flamingo77]

Hi All

Using an old username as I don’t want to be identified but I’ve been here a while and am on here a lot!

I’ve had a fairly stressful few months. DH was made redundant, but thankfully found something just before I was let go whilst on mat leave. Not a genuine redundancy in my case, long story short following taking advice from a solicitor I am taking my former company to tribunal on the basis of maternity discrimination.

The good news is that a former client that I worked for a couple of years ago made me aware that they are hiring and encouraged me to apply. It is my dream job and I would be delighted to work with them.

The problem is that my confidence has been severely diminished and I am dreading the interview. Separately but still relevant - I feel overwhelmed by commencing the tribunal process and baby DC is a terrible sleeper, so I feel like I am half mad and running on empty (DH does help as much as he can, but I am still breastfeeding and it’s easiest for me to settle DC at night, particularly as DH is now working). Being let go feels personal - I recently found out that the company had done similar to another woman recently but offered her a settlement, but have not done the same for me - I think they think I will just let it go. My skill set matches the role and I am hardworking and competent and a supportive, kind colleague, which this company already knows - but don’t feel I am capable of much right now and am absolutely terrified by the thought of the interview (which is with a panel of people I have not met/worked for, rather than the lady who encouraged me to apply and who has put in a good word for me). I feel I don’t have a clue how to put across that I am a good fit or to “sell myself” and feel like a complete fraud. It doesn’t help that I haven’t had an interview for 8 years.

Does anyone have any advice please on how I can regain my confidence and prepare? I haven’t told many people as I can’t bear the thought of having to tell them I wasn’t successful - those whom I have told have said how I am well suited to the role and that they will be lucky to have me but I just don’t feel that way right now.

When is the interview?

It will be either end of next week or at some point the week after.

Can you make some notes, like prompt cards- especially if it's a behaviour competency type interview?

thank you, I don’t know what sort of interview it will be, @Ilikewinter- although I do not expect I will have to give a presentation. It is a sideways move rather than a promotion, although it comes with a pay rise (my contact there apologised profusely for the salary range but I was delighted, another reason it is good to move on from my old employer - but another reason as to why I would love the opportunity and why I feel I am perhaps not worth the pay increase. Ugh).

I plan to take the job advert and annotate with STAR examples from my own experience / CV in the first instance. It will be a Teams interview so I could have this to hand.

Just a thought - can anyone recommend any useful podcasts / YouTube videos that might help with confidence issues and/or interviews please?

Is there a hiring manager you could speak to? Partly to find out the interview format but also useful to find out anything that might direct you to emphasise certain things in the interview. Whenever I’ve done this, I’ve always been offered the job. It helps with the interview as I feel better prepared, particularly if the person I speak to is then on the interview panel as you’ve (hopefully!) already established rapport.

You could look at Amy Cuddy's TED talk on power poses Amy Cuddy: Your body language may shape who you are | TED Talk. I've found it helpful in the past.

Hi OP. I recommend Interview Boss podcasts (google it) - brilliant advice which I was sort of half-doing intuitively anyway (with good results), but realised that a lot of people don't. Essentially interviews are best approached as "what do I want the panel to know about me" ie your career highlights and things you are most proud of, then working this information into snappy stories that you practice and can tell fluently in answer to a range of questions.

I like getting a stack of blank index cards and making notes on the company, notes about my CV, notes from the job description and how I meet it etc. Then read through and practice in front of a mirror. You don't need loads of time to prepare, quality over quantity.

Good luck and go for it!

I can 100% relate to this! I had to leave a job i loved after over 20 years when we relocated. I spent 2 years having 6 different jobs that were all awful in different ways! Working in a fish feed factory with a toxic manager after being a firefighter was a real low point.

I lost all my confidence and when a job came up that I could do with the same service I had to leave but in my location, I struggled so much to accept I might get it. I also heard it was earmarked for someone else so I felt I couldnt take the rejection or disappointment again so why put myself through it.

I actually wrote an email withdrawing the day before but my old workmates convinced me not to send it.

I did so much prep and that was overwhelming in itself! I will see if I can find a photo.

I attended the interview with my now boss, I would say I was so unconfident and had resigned myself that I had no chance... bit I did gave my real life experience to falll back on which must have got me through. I was so passionate about it and I think that cane across.

That was the Thursday and at Friday at 5pm I had a call from my now boss. I prepared myself for a NO , thinking Im the last call on a Friday so I definitely dont have it.

When he offered me it, unprofessional as it was I nearly burst out crying. All those jobs, all the awful experiences and now I felt valued again. He even told me I undersold myself.

Don't let your confidence get in the way of your dream job, all those wee doubts that creep in, others bringing you down but you are in charge and you are strong, confident and you DESERVE the job because of all your had work.

I LOVE being back in the service, I feel so taken care of and valued. Those other experiences are a distant memory although thry probably did help me in this job I do now.

I NEEDED that job I didn't just want it.

You got this!

This was my job prep, it was a pqa interview.

Good luck xxx

Thank you all so much!
@TravellingJackthere is a hiring manager. I will see if I am able to have a discussion with her prior to interview.
@Itisnotdownonanymap@BingaBongBoomI will check those out today. I know I can do the job if I was able to get it - I have imposter syndrome in relation to the interview it seems, not the job (is that a thing?!)
@Firefightress1a huge thank you for taking the time to share your story and for your kind words. It means a lot. I’m so glad you left those awful jobs behind you and that you secured your wonderful current role.

Look up Amy Cuddy’s TED talk, it’s fantastic and covers exactly this

ETA: sorry didn’t RTFT and see it’s already recommended so +1 for a recommendation!

all the best with the tribunal etc as well ❤️