Part time work / part time mothering

[ThatRedBird]

I am on maternity leave and I am due to go back to work in October, when my child will be 12 months. I am planning to work part time. But I am hoping to hear what part time set up do you have ? Or have had when DC were little?
I just need inspirations and reassurances.

For context - I have a good career, earn well, always worked very hard and took my work seriously. But I am very well aware of precious time that is given to me with my little boy, so I would like to make the most of it. I am also older mother - 36, so waited some time to start a family

With the caveat that it does depend on your job, as this isn't universal, for most PT workers, it makes sense not to work on a Monday because most BHs fall on a Monday if you are in England (4 always do, 1 is always a Friday and 3 move days).
With many contracts, this means you can't work because the business is closed, but have to use 7.5 hours leave, when you only get 3/5 of that amount, so you will be giving your employer hours each time. If you don't work Mondays, you gain hours from them.

Some people like to split the week, so they are never 'unavailable' to clients / service users / patients / customers / colleagues for longer periods of time.
Others (most of us I think) prefer to have a block of work then a block of time at home.

Personally, I wouldn't work 2.5 days, unless you can work 5 days a fortnight.
By the time you've got out the door in the morning, and commuted, then finished and commuted back, that supposed 1/2 day you thought you had with little one is mostly gone and fairly useless.
3 days is a really nice mix to keep your career but also have time at home with your little one.

Mondays and Fridays do tend to be the most popular non working days, so some like having different ones as quieter to go places or make appts, but others like the idea of meeting up with friends so prefer the more popular days.

Some work places might have busier days or more relaxed Fridays - again, some like to be in for those some like to avoid.

Really useful to be in for the day(s) your Team might commonly have Team meeting or training, or you find yourself really out of the loop. Only you will know if it is important to be in on particular days with your specific job.

You need to submit your flexible working request as soon as you can. It us only 12 weeks or so away!

I work Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. I find it helpful to have work concentrated. But I know others on 3dagd have said they find a gap mid week works for them. You could also think about compressed hours.

I work 5 days a week 9-1. DC are now school aged so I can do a shop/get dinner prepped after work and then collect them from school. We have a childminder for school hol mornings.

I love the balance of work and parenting. Work is my grown-up time and I love my job. But I also love having the time with the DC even if it’s refereeing fights, helping with homework, running after them, shuttling them to extracurricular stuff etc etc. I do also do the household jobs (bit of cleaning, cooking, laundry, tending to pets) while home with them.

DH works FT but comes home to a (relatively) orderly home and (most of the time) dinner. We share child and home responsibilities when it’s the two of us for evenings and weekends. Really works for us.

To put another perspective in - I went down to 4 days (finance role) and my workload largely stayed the same. I now do a 5 day a week job but get paid for 4. I tolerate it as I value the flexibility it affords - I have never missed a sports day or a parents evening - but honestly I could probably manage those things working full time.

DH is a teacher so we tend to split things such that I make things work during term time (e.g. sick children, less office time) and I catch up during the school holidays. It works ok but often feels like it could all fall to pieces.

Sometimes I feel like I'm losing at everything - not able to give my all to my career and not seeing as much of the kids as I'd like. But I think that's just the inconvenient truth whilst they are small.

P.s. even if you're working part or full time, you're still full time mothering! No getting away from juggling that ball!

In what way are you part time mothering?

I work in a Professional role in Healthcare.
When DS was a baby/toddler, I worked 2 days a week Tue and Wed), enough to keep my career ticking over but lots of time to enjoy the early years.
When he started Primary I went up to 3,Monday Tuesday and Friday with occasional weekend working and another day off in lieu during the week which worked well as I could clear things up at the end of the week ready for the following - B/Hs not relevant as we worked them anyway in a 7 day a week service and this was reflected in our leave allowance.
Secondary I went up to 4.
I realise I was very lucky to have the flexibility and the financial stability to be able to do this (was an older mother so career a bit more established, mortgage relatively small) and I really enjoyed time at home with DS

Thank you all for your replies.
I am still struggling to understand the point about BH and not working Mondays and Fridays. I will Google it a bit more.
I am hoping to work 3 days or maximum 4 but if I work 4 I would only like to do 0.7FTE. i appreciate this would only make sense if I stick to my contract hours to the T. Which will be a new thing for me - I always worked in roles where no-one cared about the contract hours, and everyone worked overtime as a default and until the job done. But with having a small child, I would rather don't do that.

I am thinking of doing Monday, Tuesday, Thursday. This was I am never away from work for more than one business day.

I used to have a day off in the middle of the week and one at the end - I worked 3 days a week when kids were little. I found this was good to give them a break from nursery mid week too.

The BHs thing, is generally for people who work in an office type environment.

Say (for argument's sake) each working day is 7.5 hours.
Everyone (in England) has 8 days (60 hours over a year)
People working FT use those 80 hours during the BHs.

People working PT who work Mondays have (at least) 4 Mondays where the BH hours use up 30 of the hours (plus the 30 hours they use actually having time off on Good Friday and whatever days Christmas Day, Boxing Day and NY Day fall on that year) so have 'used up' 60 hours. However, they will have only 'earned' 3/5 of 8 days or 3/5 of 60 hours.... ie 36 hours. So they have to give back 24 hours from their own AL hours to make that up.
If they don't work Mondays, they still are given 3/5 of 8 BHs (36hours) which they don't need to take on the actual BH Mondays, so that becomes 36 hours 'additional' AL they can take when they wish.

As I say, it doesn't apply to all contract, but is fairly common.

My non work day is a Friday, in an ideal world a non work Wednesday would have been better to break up the week however that’s meetings central day in my organisation. I do find I need to be really strict about sticking to my hours and not overstretching or swapping days to do a Friday as it would cost me more with requesting an ad hoc nursery day for DD.

This is not strictly true. I have worked for companies where my 20 days were pro rata and I still received 8 full bank holidays (20 days for a 3 day week) however I have also been allocated a pro rata of 28 days (16.8 days if 3 days rather than 5) at another company. This is as per the government website, based on fairness for FT to PT employees and there’s even a calculator to work it out. It depends on which basis a company uses, however they would be in their right to use the latter. I do agree though, it’s better to not have Mondays as a working day otherwise those bank holiday hours get deducted

Both were office based Monday to Friday companies

I use to work 3 long days when first PT splitting the nursery runs with DP. I managed to squeeze in 27 hours per week this way whilst getting 4 days with my DD each week. Once at school I then stretched the hours across more days to meet school runs but had an agreement to condense them over the holidays

I’m back to FT work again now but don’t regret a minute of that extra time I got with DD. It is still possible to pick your career back up again after several years of PT if you have already worked your way up prior to maternity leave

My own view now my kids are older teenagers is that, if I had my time again, I would either:

• insist the other parent also went part time; or
• go back full time from a year; or
• think as a family about how we could flex our work so that we could be around more for our child during their waking hours.

I would get a good childminder to look after my kid, in the case of a) and b).

Did your baby’s other parent turn themselves inside about about part time fathering? Whatever you do, please, please don’t refer to yourself as either a part time worker or a part time mother. It’s inaccurate and demeaning.

I work 3 days - Mon, Wed & Fri. This way it’s only ever one day between working/non-working days (excluding weekends & leave). This works well for me. It helps a lot if you’re having a shitty day at work, you know the next day is a day off; & conversely if you’re having a shitty day with your kid the next day your at work & they’re at childcare/school. It also means now mine are at school my days off can be used to get the mundane stuff done like food shopping, cleaning etc to keep weekends free. It also means I can do fun stuff on my days off like courses & DH can take them off so we can do stuff together (within school hours).

I work 4.5 days condensed over 4 (start work at 8am on my 2 wfh home days and take half an hour lunches every day). My non working day is a Thursday and I love it because I feel like my main working week is done by the Wednesday. Friday is a wfh day and I can catch up/get ready for the next week.

Also, @ThatRedBird there is a very high probability that if you are contracted for 4 days, you will end up working much more than that in reality, unless you’re brutal about working to rule.

I have one rare male colleague who did this post-kids as did his wife. He is still the most productive member of my team hour-for-hour.

I think when you get down to 3 days contracted the pressure to do a ‘full load’ is less. So, in short; I think 4 days is no good: might as well do 5 and get your pay and pensions for that. Squash it down to 9 in 10 days or 4 long days if needed.

@BleuBeans
It is true, with the caveat I gave that it doesn't apply to all contracts.
I was just helping the OP to understand why - for a lot of people - working Mondays can be bad. But was very clear it wasn't universal and she would need to check in her role.

As an older mother too (42) i absolutely chose to go back pt, for pre school years. I knew this was my only chance to experience motherhood and I wasn't going to waste it.

Much better balance, still earning but also time to be a Mum. When I went back FT in year 1 it was hard doing breakfast and after school clubs so i dropped a day to experience being a school run at gate parent.

Depends on the job really. I had my daughter at 37. She was 11 months when I went back 4 days a week. I was an operations manager in a shop. I really really struggled leaving her. Last October I stepped down and took an over night position working 2 nights a week. Because it’s over night I get a good hourly rate so bring a decent chunk home to say I only work 14 hours a week.

I needed it though. My mental health deteriorated being apart from her so much.

I do 4 days 9-4. Don't work Mondays as that's the only day with the bank holidays that works to take off.
I had a great career before kids, going back to work part time has completely killed it off. You just can't be every where, the guilt of not able to attend all the school stuff and then the guilt of not always performing at work.
Resentment is also huge as my career suffered partners didnt. Would suggest being very clear to your partner what you expect. It's very easy to just go to work when someone is always there to do all the running around with baby!

Father's get away with a lot more.