what constitutes caring responsibilities?

[aGirlLikeJesamine]

i had to take some time off to take dm to a doctor appointment.
i was told by my boss i wasnt her carer
but she has no one else
my dh also needs taking to appointments but generally these are not emergency
carers leave is not paid anyway. i did ask for special leave, which is unpaid.
do i need to fill out a form anyone know?

There are some new provisions/new law that started about a year ago and sounds as though your manager is not up to speed yet. You are now entitled to up to 1 weeks leave per year (unpaid) as carers leave, and a parent who has care needs as a result of their age absolutely would count, you don't have to register anywhere as their carer. It does not have to be an emergency situation, on the contrary you are supposed to give notice of when you want the leave. You can take the leave in single days or half days, so what you did sounds fine.

The business can ask that you take the leave on a different day if there are justifiable reasons why the particular day is hard for you to be absent, but they can't prevent you from taking it altogether. I'd have a read of the ACAS page and maybe show to your manager, suggest they might want to update their carers leave policy maybe?

ACAS link

thank you @NoctuaAthene that's really helpful

I work in local government and recently had 1 week per year paid approved. The LA I work for only started doing it few months ago.
I take odd hour here and there for my mum,.dad and child as they can't get to appointments otherwise. So yes you should get it and paid but depends on where you work