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Demands of work - managing people's personalities and annoyances

1 reply

Acecarad · 10/06/2025 20:57

I am leaving my job, moving back home to Ireland and going to work part-time and partially retiring. My current job is a Band 8 in the NHS. It's stressful but more stressful recently. My manager did not want me to report a child protection concern that the rest of the team felt should be reported and escalated to my manger's counterpart in social care. It eventually escalated all the way up to necessitating police involvement. I spent a weekend really worried about it before going against my manager and escalating up the chain. Now she is being so off with me.

The week before I asked a colleague to come to a meeting with a family to help us to get our Team's perspective across to them as the relationship with most of the Team they had been working with had completely dissolved. I used the word 'add weight' to our perspective in an email to her and got a Teams call saying I was trying to bully and strong arm the parents and wasn't putting the patient first - this young person is seriously ill and the parents need to stay involved with our service to get her better. I discussed with my colleague that I was upset that she thought I was trying to bully or strong-arm the parents. She spent 45 mins defending her disagreement with my use of the word 'add weight to' in an email, so I just left it. Since then she has been dismissive of anything I say in meetings, and was on her phone all through a presentation I did yesterday. I just feel I don't have the energy for all these work politics any more - it's just draining. I don't know if it's because I am near sixty or not. Am I getting old and grumpy?

OP posts:
CatloverNY · 10/06/2025 21:02

I hear you as sometimes I feel the same. I have weeks where I feel awful about the way things are then weeks where I feel really I’ve really achieved something and that gets me through.
sounds toxic and is it likely to improve.
ic not you may need to consider doing what you say for your own wellbeing.

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