Non-working day or 4 days over 5? Help ! What to choose?

[BeFairAzureSeal]

I work full time and I’m going to burn out. My contractual hours are 7.5 hours + 1 hour unpaid lunch break a day. However to meet minimum targets I generally have to work 11 hours a day.

Before kids this looked like 8-7 a day, plus commute.

Post kids it’s 9-5.30 (because I’d never see them if I was in the office longer) plus commute meaning I leave the house at 7.30am and return home at 7pm (apart from 2 working from home days where I tend to start at 8.30 and finish at 5, to enable me to do the drop offs and pick ups those days). But I then have to make up time in the evening when the boys (age 1&3) are asleep. Lately bedtime has been horrendous (regressions?? Illnesses) and sometimes we aren’t finished bedtime until 9 (like tonight, and still going!!)

i then have to do 3+ hours of work, taking me to 1am.

this is without making my lunch or breakfast for next day, basic hygiene like showering, talking to my husband, cleaning the house,

I just can’t live like this.

i feel like I need to reduce my hours (and therefore my targets, prorata, albeit things like training / meetings / BD etc don’t get reduced and don’t count towards targets, so I will technically have less available time to meet targets, I think?) but would you:

1. drop down to 4 days and have a non-working day to basically catch up / do work on that day as my “hitting targets” day, but still the rest of the week is horrendous and I hardly see the kids: or
2. reduce hours to do 4 days over 5, eg 9-4.30 so that I can get home earlier, get the kids to bed earlier and have more evening to catch up?

Neither, why would you drop a days pay to still work on that day?!

To meet targets sadly. It’s unfortunately a culture that people need to work over (by about 3 hours a day) to meet targets. Currently due to family I’m doing those 3 hours from 9-midnight or later and I am burning out. We need my money from the job.

If you literally can’t do your job in less than 11 hours a day, there’s something wrong with the job and I’d suggest getting a new job over either other option. Definitely don’t get paid less to do the same amount of work.

I would do five shorter days because I suspect you will find yourself working longer on four days to somehow 'make up' for daring tohave a day off a week.

But I would also be putting a cv together ad staring to look for a new job. That sort of work just isn't sustainable.

Honestly I worked in recruitment and it was like this. Expected to work hours and hours for free on a shit salary.I would retrain, you cannot continue living like that. Is that an option? Do you like your job?

That sounds horrendous. I'd opt for dropping a day and having a complete non working day BUT STICK TO IT.

Does your husband also work FT? Could he also drop down to 4 days per week to spread the load? If not, Would paying for additional help in the house be an option? Or a nanny-cum-housekeeper?

I agree that you will burn out if something doesn't change.

I think option 2 is better but neither one sustainable. No wonder you are feeling burnt out , that’s hideous and even worse with young kids like you have . Definitely look for a new job if you can

I agree with this.

can you tell me what sector this is to remind me never ever to try to get into it? I’ve worked long hours jobs too but nothing this bad.

So if you’re a lawyer I’d look for another job - depends on your specialism and PQE but in some areas firms struggle to recruit, a lot of firms are more flexible or look at a move away from private practice (but that will likely come with a pay drop). Or a PSL role?

I used to work 4 days - that did reduce my target and my boss’ expectations - I worked a lot after ds was in bed but it was ok for a while - it’s not sustainable though and as your dcs get older you want to do more with them & they want to do more with you.

I got older too and I can’t do long hours anymore. It’s also a very hard way to live.

This is obviously lawyer focused - if you’re not a lawyer this still might be some help?

look after yourself though, whatever your job don’t let yourself get burnt out it’s awful x

Another lawyer here thinking "I bet OP's a lawyer!" OP, if you are a lawyer, like PP I would suggest keeping an eye out for PSL roles - much better work/life balance! In the meantime, I would angle for an official full day off - otherwise I think there's a high risk you'll end up doing full-time work for part-time pay. Think about what day will work best as a day off. When I used to work on corporate transactions, trying to take Friday off was often tricky due to deadlines being end of the week.

Where is your husband in all of this? Is he doing at least 50% of the housework? If not, why not?

Sounds awful! You need to be sure that dropping hours doesn’t lead to proportionately more unpaid hours.
For me, I would want to stop the post-bedtime work.

I am not sure what you do but in Law extra hours are pretty much the norm unless you want to earn a lot less /give up seniority
I would be wary of shorter days as it can be so difficult to stop /leave for the day
Very common for part time workers to basically work the same hours for less pay
Start thinking about what role/job would be more family friendly

If you are a lawyer, can you look for an in-house role? A friend of mine was walking on air after she switched to in house. Hours were 9-5.

I'd look for a new job, with a shorter commute and reasonable working hours.

Sorry, not what you want to hear, but I dont think dropping a day will reduce your workload much - they will just expect the same amount if work, but your pay will drop. They have proven that the targets are unsustainable, why would that change with less hours?

This!

What industry are you in? Are you in sales?

What is everyone else doing?

yeh my husband is doing 100% of the housework 😂

I worked in education and it was like this.

i dropped to 4 days but did it over 5. The year I had a day off it was too tempting just to sleep.

I wouldn't drop your hours and get paid less unless you think it would actually make a difference. I would have a chat with your management team and tell them it's unsustainable for you.
I'd work out what I think is sustainable in the working hours you are actually being paid for and discuss this with them. Accepting it may affect bonuses and progression. If they want to retain you they will compromise on your targets.
Ultimately, if I'm not that keen on the company anyway I'd probably just work my hours only, drop the rope and start looking for another job with more flexibility and better hours.
By working 3 hours extra a day you are effectively giving them 2 full extra working days a week for nothing. So unless you love the work and the bonuses make it worth it you should just stop. They can't make you work more hours than you are contracted for.
Practice saying no and practice quiet quitting. Get your life back.

Targets should be set to be a stretch but achievable. Address this as a quick fix. No point cutting hours as you will still work them.