Giving in your notice without another job?

[Furrybaby]

I currently work in what feels like a toxic environment with no senior management support.
The work pressure is horrendous and I feel set up to fail all the time. My management never offer support or solutions but will find a way to call me most days and make me feel like a failure (for not completing stuff that they couldn't complete in this job).
I cry most days either on the way to work, at work or on the way home (or all 3). I can't ever switch off and sometimes I get palpitations on a Sunday at the thought of going back.
Discussed this with my husband recently and there are only two options as far as I can see.

1. Hand in my notice and look for other jobs (I've started looking recently and applied for a couple). I have a 3 month notice period and a financial buffer of 2-3 months after. I also worry about 3 month notice period could put off potential employers.
2. Go off sick. But I worry a few weeks of sickness would affect my future employment.

I just feel so trapped right now which is making the whole situation feel worse.

What would you do? Anyone done similar?

With a 3 month notice period I would put your notice in and apply like crazy. You can't win in an environment like that and it's just not worth it.

You'll never regret leaving a job that makes you cry. Put in your notice: half a year is long enough to find something else.

A three month notice period is not uncommon. It won't interfere with your next job, and there is a possibility that you could negotiate a reduction. I wouldn't give your notice until you have something else. Depending on your sector the job market is tough, so don't leave yourself open.

Bin the job. That level of stress isn't worth it. Put your effort into finding a job that you like.

That is truly awful! It’s not right or normal to cry that much about work (and I am a cryer, so I understand your pain).

I’ve done it before with a 3 month notice period. I got 2 job offers in that time, both with a 25% pay increase in an industry I wanted to get into. In fairness, this was around 2006/early 2007, so in the boom times before the GFC.

It sounds like your current situation is untenable, so yes I would do it in those circumstances.

I had a similar conversation with my DH last week. I had a truly awful week and cried twice that week. I only have a short notice period but am considering taking a 3 month break. I will try to tough it out for a few more months as we could really do with building up more savings before I take an extended break.

Best of luck with the job hunt!

I’d go out for a walk at lunch one day when you’re feeling strong and it’s sunny. And call recruitment and temp agencies. You might get an idea if temporary work is likely in your field or what the market is like.
Id be tempted to hand in my notice but have a sick week and apply non stop for stuff /let yourself have a break before your body forces you to as they say - this level of stress can be really bad for you

I have handed my notice in and have a 3 month notice period too.

I have some interviews lined up and will keep applying till I find something.

my issue is the job and it’s given me so much anxiety I am now on sertraline. Only been here 6 mths when I handed it in.

no one so far has balked at the notice period although at my level it is excessive.

Thanks everyone.
I'm currently laid awake as as I was driving home i got a call making me aware of a crisis I've to deal with today.
I can't sleep as I've no idea what the hell I'm going to do so it's unlikely I'll sleep tonight. This is my whole life right now, crisis to crisis not sleeping wondering how to fix the next one with no solutions or support from management.

I've little time or energy to spend with my family how the fuck am I going to put together coherent job applications? And at the risk of sounding dramatic one of my biggest worries is with a 58 mile commute each way, is falling asleep at the wheel on the way home.

I suggested to dh that I get signed off sick for a few weeks to give me a chance to recalibrate and rest and start applying but he thinks that this will negativity impact any job prospect if they see I've applied while being off sick or if they see I've had a period of sick leave.

I'd get signed off. I work in HR and it's vanishing rare to have a sick record provided in a reference. They can't ask health questions prior to offer either.

Usually on a 3 month notice period I'd say quit and look, but the job market is brutal rn. Can you take some sick leave and then 'quiet quit' whilst you look?

Thanks, the ridiculous thing is seeing the impact that this is also having on my family. So, for instance to try and make up for lost sleep tonight and not try and fall asleep at the wheel on Thursday I'll have to have an early early night tomorrow night (as I've to be up at 5) so my son won't be able to have his friends round after tea for a couple of hours or game as the noise will stop me trying to sleep. It sounds pathetic in the grand scheme of things but it illustrates a constant series of sacrifices that my family have to make to accommodate me being in a job that makes me stressed all the time.

I am a firm believer in prioritising your own mental health in times like this. Hand in your notice. Life is too short to have a job that causes this level of stress.

The NHS, which is the largest employer, asks for sick record over previous 2 years as part of reference. Just number of days off, factual info only.
But I’d agree with prioritising your health and taking action before you make yourself too ill to function well enough to even apply for new roles

In your situation I would take sickness absence for a week as a first step, just to gather your thoughts.

You can always resign afterwards if necessary.

They can ask for whatever they like but the previous employer has no obligation to provide it.
Most organizations especially private sector just provide tombstone refs these days ie date employed from/ to and job title.

If you’re ok financially, I’d resign in a heartbeat, it’s really not worth putting yourself through that every day. I did exactly that 20 years ago, granted though, it was a different job market back then. To give you an idea of how much difference it made, I’d been trying to conceive for a year with no luck and was pregnant within 3 weeks of leaving that stressful role. I recently went through something similar and was prepared to leave with nothing to go to. Luckily I found a new job pretty quickly before I had to take that option.

If you resign now, you have 3 months to look for something else that’s permanent. You can also spend time contacting agencies in preparation of securing temporary work if needed.

Good luck and I hope it all works out for you. I know it’s scary but sometimes you have to take the leap to reach something better for you and your family.

I think there’s no option other than to quit and I would take one or two sick days to get the ball rolling on job applications. Get yourself all over LinkedIn as well and I would also use these next three months to aggressively save money and build up your small buffer by being as frugal as you can.

I have, sort of. I walked away from a job that made me cry with ridiculous constraints. I didn’t have another to go to but I was in my 20s with limited commitments so could take a risk. They were shocked I was walking away (clearly didn’t understand how unnecessarily difficult they had made the role). They told me they were getting someone with much more experience to replace me (implied their issues were of my creation, they weren’t). My replacement, unknown to them, was a friend of mine. I warned her how I had found the job. I had lasted a term, she found I hadn’t exaggerated and lasted 3 days! Meanwhile I had landed another contract before the hideous one ended, so no gap in my employment and my faith in my job restored!!

Walk away, life is too short.

10 years ago i wouldnt have said this but very honestly....

I would go off sick - if you get full pay it will likely affect nothing certainly not a reference.
Apply like mad for jobs.
Wait until they inevitably look to mutually agree for you to leave (due to being signed off) and collect your 3 months notice wihhout having to work it.

Save aggressively in this period

If it is that bad I would hand your notice in.

I tried to apply and wait but was getting nowhere. Reset my expectations on jobs - basically same money that I earnt in last tax year rather than an increase on current salary. Only a few grand between what I earnt last tax year from previous jobs and new jobs to what salary for this year would be just at current one.

i have applied for anything that I think I can do. Had one interview which didn’t get. Got another tomorrow and 2 next week.

if my 3 months is up and no job, I will temp. Local agency said plenty of warehouse jobs although temp office ones thin on ground.

I was a mess and to go on sertraline due to such high anxiety was the turning point.

I feel better since doing it, and then did question myself but have since had days where the anxiety has been sky high again.

there are other things contributing to my anxiety but the job was the last straw and the only thing I can change.

I do feel silly but at 48 I need to put mental health first. The people I work with are lovely and it’s just the actual job that causes the anxiety and being such a small office - one per dept.

I considered going off sick and it’s still an option but we only get statutory so trying to avoid that unless it’s really necessary.

do need to work and will temp in whatever if necessary.

by sounds of it you need to go off sick for a week at least as suggested to be able to think and apply.

Go off sick. Then hand in your notice. Might as well get paid for the illness that your job has caused you?

I am in a similar situation OP and it is so depressing. I already 'burned out' two year ago in my current job due to the toxic environment and I needed to be under the care of the mental health crisis team and I can feel myself heading the same way again due to unrealistic workload and constant backstabbing/politics.

If I were you I would either book some time off if possible or get signed off for stress before you have a complete breakdown. Then use that time to job search and register with agencies.

I have learned not to show any loyalty to toxic employers who are only too happy to use you, so you could always use your maximum fully paid sick leave and then give your 3 month notice and quiet quit while you are serving your notice.

Same situation here OP. What’s the job market like for your skills? Would it be easier to go for a contract position?
You probably need some time to put your cv together and get your confidence back - for that reason it may be worth taking some time off sick before you resign.

Three months’ notice is normal in most professional jobs. I’d get applying for other jobs and hand in your notice, if the job market in your area is buoyant. Maybe speak to a couple of recruiters first to see what the market is like?

Can you negotiate your notice ? Do you have any annual leave you can use ?

I would go on sick for a while and look for other jobs. Mind you protection is limited if you have been there less than 2 years.

I dont know what sector you are in - but the job market is very tough and has been tor a while. So when people say you will get something in 3 months that might not happen - if you are willing to do any job shouldn't be an issue.