Therapy regarding stress and trauma at school (primary teacher)?

[hellothegrrreeeen]

Therapy regarding stress and trauma at school (primary teacher)?

Background - I have just left teaching a primary age class this easter after six years in the classroom.
I left due to WRS and panic disorder due to poor behaviour, lack of control in the classroom (overwhelm as I just felt like 1 person in the classroom could not satisfy the behaviour and Sen needs of the class) and violence of the children.

I have been applying for jobs and feeling like my normal before self however still getting flashbacks to classroom with sweaty palms, beating heart etc. Few people understand how terrible conditions were in there for me because on the surface everything looked “fine”.

I think some of this could be to do with a feeling of failure of leaving mid year and answering questions on why I left and feeling just pure GUILT . I also feel like I let myself down by choosing the wrong career.

Contending with a lot and feeling like I may need professional help. I have been dismissed by NHS talking therapies who gave me an assessment and then a online do it yourself course on “stress management” which was useless.

Has anyone else had experience of psychological help regarding teaching / post-teaching ? What was helpful to you / would you recommend ? Any advice would be appreciated. TIA

I have no advice. But I recognise the feelings and think you’re amazing for getting out. Good luck in the future and hope someone with good advice comes along soon.

Your new school may offer counselling services if you can get yourself a new job (ours does). But are there any options though the teachers unions (I wouldn't know as I'm not a teacher just support role). Either that or you'll probably have to go private.

I am no longer a member of the NEU (was £18 a month so i cancelled my membership in april) but I will have a look at their services, thank you :)

I recognise your feelings all too well. I never qualified as I was bullied on my PGCE by my class teacher mentor and university tutor (!) I was signed off with stress and have had several periods of private counselling to work through the experience, and was later diagnosed with PTSD. I have been through all sorts of feelings: guilt, despair, shame, anger. I changed careers to do a PGCE so felt I should have been able to "cut it," as I was nearly 30 when I trained. Even now, fifteen years down the line with a senior role in a different area of the education sector I have flashbacks and my confidence will disappear in a flash.

Give yourself a lot of time and space to heal. It takes a very long time. Sleep, rest and exercise and decent private therapy has been the best thing for me. I have had several courses of private counselling since the experience, and this is has been the most beneficial ultimately. I struggled for a long time with the question of why I hadn't qualified, before eventually settling on "I love working in education but realised I didn't want to be a classroom teacher." It wasn't strictly true - I did want to teach - but it gave a way for me to talk about my skills could still be useful in the sector beyond the classroom, and gave me an explanation to prospective employers about why I hadn't qualified without needing to talk about the real reason why.