Poor leadership / emotionally immature boss

[Brieagain]

Just wondered if anyone had any advice about the situation with my boss

I'm a people pleaser, always have been, trying to work on it

Long successful career in public sector where I think I have credibility; moved into my current role 12m ago, and actually moved down the ladder due to wanting to go part time

My new boss is what I would describe as emotionally immature - won't performance manage or set expectations of his staff and avoids conflict.

Hes been in the same role for a very long time, has made all the decisions forever and likes to control all decisions.

He very specifically takes any attempt at team conversation about how we might get things done as a personal slight against him + and then we get "poor me, woe is me, you don't like me" behaviour for days, where everyone then panders to him until he cheers up. It's driving me mad as I think in a senior leadership role this is inappropriate

Any pearls of wisdom on how to cope?

I'd honestly look to move to another role. In the CS frequent movement isn't unusual. If you've moved down grades then you will be in a good position for applications and interviews. If he's been there a long time he has management who are bad or who have just plonked him there as they don't know what to do with him. I bey he has a really high turnover on his team.

You took a lesser role, and that comes with less decision making. I know it's annoying but he's the boss and making the decisions is his job, not yours.

That doesn't mean you can't "upwardly manage" him. Plant little seeds of ideas, then wait for him to bring them out as his ideas 6 months later. 😀

The sulking would drive me crazy though. Not sure what you can do about that. WFH? Look for a new job?

Thanks both - really helpful. Agree on all fronts, and yes, really high turnover!