I have a childcare dilemma and I dont even have a job yet.... Please help me decide what to do!!!

[2point4kids]

I am at home at the moment with my 2 Ds's. I worked before DS2 was born but we moved long distance when I was pg so quit my job.
Although I dont have a job to go back to at the moment, I do intend to go back to working, probably full time (there doesnt seem to be anything part time around here).

I cant start applying for jobs yet as I dont want to start work right now as Ds2 is still too little. Ideally I'd like to start work about Oct/Nov this year, so will probably start looking and applying in September.

DS1 is at nursery 3 afternoons a week. Its a private nursery and he has been going there for almost a year now. He is settled and happy there and I am happy with them. They have said to me that if I want DS2 to go there too I will have to apply for a place now to guarantee he gets a place.

I'm not sure whether putting them both in nursery is the best thing though as although Ds1 gets a lot out of it, DS2 might benefit more from one to one care seeing as he is smaller?

Whatever I do, MIl has said she will have the boys 1 day a week herself, so for the remaining 4 days the options are:

1. Both DS's at nursery. Ds1 will have continuity and not be too disrupted. In January I will be able to get a small discount for him in place of his free nursery place entitlement. DS2 will only be 8 months old though and it might be a bit much for him to go to nursery full time?

1. Get a childminder. Will be a bit cheaper (I think? not sure if signficantly cheaper though). DS2 will get one to one care. DS1 can go to the local nursery school attached to the school for his free 5 morning a week nursery place. CM will have to take him and pick him up (will they do this?). This way he will still get the benefit of the nursery environment, which I think at his age does him good.

Downside of this is that he will have to leave the nursery he is used to and get used to both a CM and then a new nursery school in January.

I really need to decide which option to go for now as I need to get on waiting lists either way and I cant decide!!!!

Which sounds like the best option for both children at their ages?? Please help me decide and tell me any pros and cons that I may not have thought of!

Thank you (and sorry this post is so long!!)

are you sure the nursery mean that you need to apply now and get the place now/ perhaps they mean you should apply now for a place in Nov or sep (which is what most nurseries do)?

if not, does he have to go 3 days a week?

how old is he? it is my experience that younger children do get a lot less out of nursery than older children. childminder is better because of the single carer (though it's not usulayy one to one!)

when i go back to work from mat leave dd1 3 will stay at nursery , she has been there from 8 months and dd2 4 months will go there too.
I have done this for continuity for dd1 so i would say put nam down for nursery.
A childminder will prob have to charge for full day anyway if she hasto drop off and collect from pre school.

Sorry, I wasnt being clear!
I mean that I have to apply now to get him a place in October/November. I dont want to apply to save him a place though if I am going to go for a childminder instead of nursery iyswim. (will they charge me if I apply for them to reserve him aplace and then say I dont want it when the time comes?)

He is 12 weeks now, so will be 7/8 months by the time he will go there.

If you're talking about sending him to a school Nursery in Jan 2009, you're probably too late, unless you can get a 'last minute' place. Those places would have already been allocated. IME some CMs will do nursery pick ups, but they will charge for the whole day (they can't take on another mindee during that time period, plus they would need to be on call)

Really.. is that right about a cm charging full time even if DS1 is at nursery? I was thinking they might charge half rates or something for that...
That might mean that a CM would not be that much cheaper than nursery then I guess..

I put his name down at the school nursery a year ago when we moved here 'just in case' so hopefully he will have a place if we want it!

it would mean they couldn't take another child so don't think there would be much price difference.

Not all do, you'd have to ask around. I know a few that will only charge for the time they have the mindee, but it's unusual. It doesn't make it worth their while taking a Nursery age child.

Do you think it would disadvantage DS1 at all to not go the school nursery and therefore not be used to the 'school' environment before he starts school at 5? if I keep him at his current nursery tht is...

my ds didn't go to pre school was only at private nursery, luckily 4 other children from his nursery went to his school so it was fine. Is his nursery near his school ?

I doubt if a private Nursery environment is that different to a school Nursery one tbh. Apart from attending the odd assembly DD doesn't have that much to do with the school proper. There are 23 children in her Nursery class, but will be around 50ish in Reception (two classes) and I think that's fairly common, so I don't think your DS would be disadvantaged by not going.

I guess i am thinking more that maybe when he starts school the other kids will all know each other from being at the school nursery and he wont know anyone..
The school i want him to go to is right near our house and about a mile away from his current nursery.

I cant put his name down for the actual school until he is 4... will him not going to the school nursery affect his chances of getting in to the school?

I chose a childminder for my two, not cheaper than nursery in London tbh.Also I now cannot find a chilminder in my area so you may have fewer options than you think?

Check cm availiability in your area before you turn down nursery in case it is your only option.

No, unless it's a tiny school with a tiny intake at reception there will be more newbies than not and it won't a blind bit of difference with his application whether he already attends the Nursery or not. Nursery attendance is not a criteria for a school place.

Also for the school nursery thing, in my area school nursery is seperate from the school itself.Some children in the nursery will be going to different state schools locally.

I don't think it matters if they are not in the nursery as lots of children in reception will be 'new'.

I'm a childminder and I've posted about this quite a few times so i've cut and pasted this for you, imo...

Nursery - great for children over 2 who are out going, bright and confident and need a more structured day. Also good for those who don't need a nap anymore or have lots and lots of energy. (I am planning to send my dd2 to nursery for one or two mornings a week when she is 3, as I think she would benefit being in a large group of children her own age with 1 activity at a time to help her concentration levels plus is it an extension to her learning)

Childminder - Great for children under 2 or children who are a bit shy, cope better with just one person (other than parents) caring for them, get tired easily, like to play with a variety of ages of children, good for children who prefer a busy morning and a quieter afternoon (where they can nap in their own cot in a dark quiet room if they need to) you want them to have a day similar to yours with outings to toddler groups, park, shop, school runs etc

As for what a childminder would charge I think it depends on each one, personally because I've got my own 2 year old I can only have 2 other under 5's and so your ds's would take up both vacancies so yes I would charge for both all day as I wouldn't be able to fill the few hours your ds would be in nursery.

Your ds will get 5 free nursery sessions per week from Jan, so you won't have to pay for both types of care for long, if there is a slight overlap in care where you would need to pay for both it may be possible for you to ask the childminder if she would mind waivering the fee until the nursery place is free - if it's only for a couple of months she may be ok with that, I'll be honest if I was fairly new or work was slack I'd be likely to be ok with that arrangement but if I was fully booked with a waiting list i'd decline because I could take on 2 children full time from different famillies which means I wouldn't be putting all my eggs in one basket because I can't afford to lose all of my income with 4 weeks notice.

Look at this from your side as well, if you can afford to pay both for a while or come to an arrangement with the childminder (who will usually be more flexible than a nursery with regard to hours, days and cost to an extent) it will work out cheaper in the long run plus both your ds's get the chance to be in a home environment together (in nursery they would always be seperate because your youngest would be in the baby room?) plus when your ds1 goes to school the childminder could still look after him after school and in holidays so your eldest would have continuity of care as well as being able to be with his little brother for parts of the day which I think is important.

hth and I havent come across too business minded about it.

To look at the selection of childminders in your area you can look on CIS website