Annual leave at work

[Handlebars]

Evening all, just wondering on people’s opinions on something.
I work in the same place part time as my daughter for nearly a year now. Been going well. Just tried to book annual leave for our family holiday this year. I need a couple of days off in the week and she needs the whole week. Been told we can’t take it together and there needs to be at least one of us in the office (there’s another girl who works from home doing the same thing also but not actually in the office). Am so gutted as this means we can never have a family holiday again. I’m close to leaving the position now as feel unfairly treated. We had a few days holiday off at the same time over Xmas too. So feel let down now. Wondered what others thought? 🙂😥

It’s annoying for you, but from their perspective they can’t treat you any differently to any other employee just because you’re related, and if one of the people in those two roles is needed in office at all times, you can’t both be off at the same time. You’re not being unfairly treated - the opposite, in fact.

That said, I would probably leave too, because it’s not really sustainable long term (depending on how old your daughter is and how often you might want to holiday together).

It's a shame.

But understandable.

Why can’t the other girl come into the office?

Can’t the person working from
home come in? What if you were sick and your dd was on leave, what would happen then?

If you have a good relationship with her, why don't you ask informally if she would mind doing this?
There may be very good reasons why she can't, but it must be worth asking her, and explaining the situation. If she says "no", then don't hold it against her though.

How old is your dd? Is she likely to want to go on holiday with the whole family for much longer? If yes, then leave..

If it's a nice PT job and you don't want it, I'm sure someone else would like it tbh. And I don't think you can claim you are being badly treated here. If you do the same job and one of you needs to be there, that's that really, unless the other girl would be happy to cover for both of you, but I'd question if that was fair if, for example, she ended up doing work for three people on the days you and dd would normally be there. Can imagine this happening in places I have worked. I'd not have been happy if I was the other girl

Your work isn’t being unreasonable, they need someone in the office and it’s not their fault you want to holiday together. It’s me of you needs to change jobs really if having a holiday together is important to you.

The thing is we had a few days off over Christmas and wasn’t questioned. Just worked out it would actually be 2 days when someone who does my job won’t be in. Others can pick up anything urgent if needed too for those 2 days which is rare.
From my experience with her she’s doing it out of spite

Why spite?

If her job is to work from home and there’s nothing in her contract to say she has to cover the office, that’s just her doing her job.

One or other of you needs to get a job elsewhere. I would have thought this obvious. It's a bit weird to conclude you can "never have a fanily holiday again" - don't either of you have any aspirations for getting a better job/developing skills/gaining seniority? It's totally normal for employers to refuse to authorise 2 people off at the same time if they are doing similar work, unless they are part of a big enough team that everyone else can cover two simultaneous absences with no bother.

Not the one that works from home the manager refusing

Ahh ok but if your manager was the spiteful type, you wouldn’t have had time off together at Christmas surely?

There would be cover for 3 days of the week. There’s 2 others doing the same job. It’s just 2 that won’t be. Anyone is the office can action a task if it’s urgent when no one in.

Not sure if I explained myself correctly

OP, as you've already had time off together I think you're being treated very fairly.
It was nice of your boss to give you time off together over Christmas, despite ideally needing one of you in the office at all times.
It's very unreasonable of you to expect time off together again, just a few months later.

This is why people from the same household working together in a small department doesn't work. DH had a couple working in one of his departments. Between wanting A/L at the same time and them 'sharing' parental leave every time their DCs were ill (always leaving the same department 1 down regardless of who stayed off), it just didn't work. In the end one had to leave.

I don't think anyone has misunderstood. Two others rather than one doesn't make an enormous amount of difference.

If there's a massive back story though (spiteful boss), that's a bit of a drip feed! Based on your op though, it sounds fine for them to say no.

Ok

@Handlebars You've explained yourself correctly.
There will be 2 days when the job won't be covered adequately.
That's not acceptable.

The employer is behaving reasonably.
The fact you're related is irrelevant to your employer.

I think you have explained yourself fine.

If this was other, unrelated team members wanting time off at the same times in such a way that there would be no one in the office doing this job on two days, would that be allowed? Are you and DD being treated differently because you are related? Or are you being treated the same as everyone else?

Yes that has happened in the past

Also myself and my daughter have had a day of together in the past leaving no one in?

This is exactly why DH and I don't work together (same field).

Doesn’t mean they want it to happen often though. Maybe they let you both be off before as a one off, but you can’t keep doing it. They are within their rights to refuse leave for a particular time. Sorry but this job won’t work out if this is an issue for you.