Made a Mistake at work now manager is ignoring me

[Llamaalpacaa]

So I made a mistake at work earlier this week, not a huge mistake in the grand scheme of things that’s going to cost money or major problems but I agreed something I shouldn’t have after misinterpreting some guidance that was released. I’m trying not to beat myself up about it because we’re only human and we all make mistakes at some point but my manager is being rather difficult with me since. I’ve apologised of course and I’ll make sure it won’t happen again but now he doesn’t answer my calls if I ring with a query or to put someone through to him, reads but doesn’t reply to teams messages and yesterday just totally ignored me in the office when asking everyone else if they wanted a tea or coffee. I suffer with anxiety so I’m really trying not beat myself up about my error but my managers response is creating an atmosphere and I don’t really know what to do about it. He has sent me a few emails since but even they are rather curt. What used to be “Hi Llama, Can you do xyz by x please. Thanks, boss” is now “Do xyz by x. Regards.” So quite a clear change of tone. He also then doesn’t respond if I ask for clarity on anything.

Do I apologise again? Am I just dramatising it and need to let it go? Just thought I’d post here for some other perspectives!

Communicate with her in front of other people, in person.

See if she ignores you then.

He sounds like a bully.

I know it's hard, but try to ignore and completely just be yourself - nice emails, smiles, friendly. You've made one mistake, which you've apologised for. You have nothing more to say sorry for.

FFS. Even if it was a huge mistake, the manager is being unprofessional and childish. Do you have an HR department?

The scale of the incident is irrelevant. The manager is acting very unprofessionally by responding in this manner. If he is annoyed he should have had a conversation with the OP at the time to set out the consequences of her error and to discuss ways to avoid it in future, and then drawn a line under it.

Your manager sounds pathetic, you won’t be the first or the last to make a mistake and you should be supported through your development not shunned.

For transparency, the mistake was I agreed a member of staff could carry over some TOIL to the next financial year and use it to take time off for an appointment in May (company policy is that so much had to be used by 31st March). Guidance was released saying x amount of TOIL could be carried over so I agreed it but missed the bit where it said it had to be used in April and the staff members appointment is the 1st May. Have spoken to HR and told them my error and they’ve amended something on the system so the time won’t drop off end of April and said it wasn’t a big deal and others had done the same (good to know it’s not just me I suppose!)

my manager is usually lovely. We’ve worked together for 6 years now and (I thought) had a good relationship so this has really taken me by surprise

Oh that’s hardly a big error is it? I have done worse and not been treated like this. Is it definitely to do with this? I’d book in a catch up with her and nip this in the bud - ask her exactly what the issue is.

And please don’t beat yourself up about this, could have happened to anyone!

Ooof, I feel your pain OP - in fact I've made an error this morning already and I'm berating myself. My boss is already in a filthy mood so I couldn't have timed it worse.

Yours doesn't sound like anything major, the member of staff is happy and HR have sorted it, so your manager being snippy won't last. He'll turn on someone else soon enough.

My error might have cost us a £6000 credit at a time where we are making cutbacks to save money, so I may as well show myself the door. 🤦‍♀️

I agree it sounds like a small mistake in the scheme of things, I also think what is important is that it’s been sorted and you’ve apologised.

Your manager is being juvenile and pathetic.

Your manager is being incredibly unprofessional. Sounds like, for some reason they have taken it personally and are now trying to punish you. Not the sign of a good manager at all.

id give it a few more days but if it continues you need to start logging the behaviours that are impacting your ability to work, such as not answering calls, not answering when putting customers through and then discuss it with HR. What you don’t want to happen is they use this behaviour to try to blame you for issues and you end up on a performance plan. Cover your arse is what I mean

He sounds like a dickhead. What purpose does he think his exclusion of you and ignoring of your work related requests will have?
If he's ignoring things and you need an answer then go to the person above him, copy him in saying 'I've not had any response from Barry over this and as it's time sensitive can I ask you if...'

Then his boss will see what he's up to and you can't be blamed for needing an answer from someone senior, else how can you do your job?

Where you've asked a question or tried to call him, make sure you're following up. Don't just try once and leave it or he'll say he didn't see it and why didn't you try again. Cover yourself. It'll be harder for him to ignore chasers.

But I agree, he's being a dick. Did he perceive you going to HR as going over his head? I'd keep my head down and hopefully it'll blow over.

Are you HR? Were you this person’s line manager? Otherwise why were you advising someone on their holiday entitlement?

A manager should never behave like this. If it doesn’t reach the bar of being fired for, they should maintain the professional relationship.
The minor admin error you made doesn’t warrant this bullying behaviour at all.

Oh how awful - he is not being a particularly good manager at all and you must feel awful. It’s bad enough when you make a mistake without him making it 10 times worse. It’s bullying behaviour in my opinion. Keep a copy of any emails (use your own phone to screenshot) and a diary of any verbal communication.

That certainly doesn’t warrant that behaviour at all! It’s internal stuff.
Can you ask for a meeting asap?

Don't worry about it. His.problem, not yours. He's a bully by the sounds of it. More to life than worrying about work.

Your manager is a bully and a very poor manager.

Bizarre overreaction from your boss.

I wonder what response his ‘withdrawal of courtesy’ is meant to get from you?

Do you think he feels threatened by you and is trying to bring you down a peg or two/make you feel insecure?

Either way - you now know how you have to behave with him - professional at all times and nothing more. Build yourself a hedge of boundaries.

I would ask for a meeting with your manager to discuss and ask why he has been ignoring your messages and calls. Hopefully you’ve kept evidence. If you are not happy about the outcome of this meeting I’d go to HR and complain you are being bullied. This is an abusive tactic and completely unprofessional and unacceptable.

if you haven’t been keeping evidence, I’d make a kite now if everything you remember and start keeping evidence and a log moving forward.

I wonder if he has been called out on your mistake by higher management, whether they have reprimanded him, and he is now taking it out on you. Either way, it is incredibly unprofessional.