What do I say if/when asked why I’m leaving?

[FlyingontheGround]

It’s looking like I will soon be leaving a role I’ve been in for a couple of years to go to another job. My reasons for wanting to leave are multiple but centre mainly around how unwelcoming the rest of the team have been and the way I’ve been spoken to by my manager on a number of occasions which led me to look elsewhere. What reason do I give for leaving - both officially and if/when colleagues ask during my long notice period? I don’t want to be unprofessional.

Thanks @CorsicaDreaming i think I’ve just been a bit unlucky, had amazing managers and colleagues for most of my career. I’m trying to see this as a blip, but they are vile. I’ve never been spoken to the way I have been in my current role and I’ve been in work for the past 25 years since I was 16 and gone right through the education system as far as masters degree level. Can’t wait to get out.

You'd be well advised to decline to attend an exit interview. There is nothing beneficial in this at all for you. In my view they're a waste of time and carry too many potential risks (like the bridge-burning you are seeking to avoid). You can't later be blamed for something you didn't say.

If the company really are serious about improving their culture let them talk to their existing employees. No longer your circus or your monkeys.

Declining an exit interview isn't all that unusual. It's unlikely this will later be remembered and held against you, but if you've dumped your grievances under the guise of honesty, it will. You also can't assume that anything you say in this interview would be treated by HR as confidential.

I say avoid.

I've recently done similar and I've just said I'm not enjoying it. There's no point trying to make a point about them being unwelcoming, no one will care and they'll genuinely believe that's your issue more than theirs

Some great advice thank you, I will avoid the exit interview if I can @SerafinasGoose

Remember they are not mandatory. You absolutely can, calmly and politely, say you are simply looking to move on without fanfare and would rather not participate.

Employers don't do this for your benefit. You're leaving and they don't have to care. They are likely gauging whether you're likely to take any form of legal action against them - albeit constructive dismissal is hard to prove - or might possibly cause them reputational damage.

Your answers will be stored on your employment records in case they receive a reference and are asked whether they would reemploy this person. They will likely ask you to sign the record after the meeting to say it's an accurate record. This covers their backsides and shows you didn't raise any grievances when you had the opportunity to raise them - in which case your bridges are burnt, which most people don't want to do.

IMO this is a disingenuous process and I would decline any offer of this interview from an employer, no matter who they where or what the circumstances in which I left.

I left my job due to the bullying store manager. I cannot say that in interviews/application forms.

Saying wanted to take a career break as didn't find job challenging enough - I love challenges. Plus doesn't show off my skills well. Plus want to leave working in a retail environment.

I'm 3 months into a new job. I was quite open about my reasons in my exit interview. This new job is a far shorter commute, about 38% payrise and fewer hours with no on-call, doing more or less the same thing, so I'd have been stupid not to take it - but if I hadn't had a micromanaging team lead who made me cry twice in a week, I wouldn't even have been looking, and if they don't know about that, they can't resolve it - and I think with some support and management training, it could be resolvable, he probably has the potential to be an okay manager. Just not with me.