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Time off with work related stress due - new employer

19 replies

Hallelujah2020 · 07/03/2025 23:28

Would having had recent time off with work related stress (due to bullying and disability discrimination) be a red flag to a new employer.

I know current employer can’t say why I’ve been off but can say amount. It is less than six weeks and shouldn’t need to be more than this now the above is being investigated. I just can’t return to the situation as it is and until HR speak to her. Once that’s done I’ll be back.

OP posts:
ET2025 · 08/03/2025 00:39

Depends on the employer I think. My former employer ( LA) disclosed my sickness related to my disability to my current employer ( I was off for 9 months due to their failure to make reasonable adjustment). At first I thought they would withdraw the offer but not only they didn’t and even offered any support that I required.

EmmaMaria · 08/03/2025 11:00

To be honest, there is no size fits all - every employer would look at it differently. So yes - some employers will run a mile at the mention of either stress or sick leave. Others would refer to occupational health. Others wouldn't care. There really isn't any way to give you a guaranteed answer.

lizzyBennet08 · 08/03/2025 11:48

Many employers would discount someone with a large amount of absence in their previous role ( regardless of the reason) however given your current employer may be anxious to be rid of you they may ( as is within their right) not disclose absence level.

Newyorklady · 08/03/2025 12:02

Some reference requests ask directly about absence levels usually for previous 2 years.
And often ask reasons.
It can be a red flag but again agree with another poster it won’t always go against you as a lot of appointing Managers will know that toxic work environments exist and if they are confident in their own environment they should be confident absences for work related stress won’t be repeated.
Having said that some staff cite work related stress to cover themselves if performance issues have been raised.
What I generally look for as a red flag is repeated and regular absences.

AnSolas · 08/03/2025 12:28

Its hard because the new job will be more worried about you bringing that past trama into your new job. If your CV is correct they know you can do the job and its about how you fit into their team.

I would try being upfront about why you are looking for a new job. Without slagging the old job off too much which may be hard to balance.
So pratice a summary of what you would want to disclose. Add in what you learned as being important re the culture of where you want to work and how this new job looks as if it will be a good fit. Ie you want a New start where you can shine

And if you go back once its resolved its a story about how you got back working as a valued team member.

Its about making sure that any disclosure by the ex-employer is not a suprise to a new one.

Supersimkin7 · 08/03/2025 12:32

Private sector - yes, of course it’s a red flag. You’ve got form for not turning up and blaming the business.

Public sector - no idea.

IDontHateRainbows · 08/03/2025 13:05

I work in hr and its vanishing rare for absence details to be on a reference.
Most employers provide 'tombstone' refs these days ie dates from/ to, job title.
You may get asked about health issues on a health dec form, but this is usually confidential between you and occ health and you can be selective in what you put.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 08/03/2025 13:29

Honestly, yes, it will be a red flag for a lot of employers, not all.

EmmaMaria · 08/03/2025 15:07

IDontHateRainbows · 08/03/2025 13:05

I work in hr and its vanishing rare for absence details to be on a reference.
Most employers provide 'tombstone' refs these days ie dates from/ to, job title.
You may get asked about health issues on a health dec form, but this is usually confidential between you and occ health and you can be selective in what you put.

I would be interested in you providing the evidence about what "most employers do" because this is oft repeated but never evidenced. I have literally never come across any employer who doesn't ask for a detailed reference and some employers must ask for (and receive) a detailed reference.

AnSolas · 08/03/2025 15:29

EmmaMaria · 08/03/2025 15:07

I would be interested in you providing the evidence about what "most employers do" because this is oft repeated but never evidenced. I have literally never come across any employer who doesn't ask for a detailed reference and some employers must ask for (and receive) a detailed reference.

May depend on the industry my last jobs would only give start date and end date not even a role or job title was included.
They dont give anything else and staff are not supposed to give out personal reference either due to risk of being sued or held liable for misconduct in the new job. And phone calls were/could be recorded so phoning out too.

One HR was obliged to go back to school days to prove no " jail time career breaks "😁 and would insist on trying to get a personal reference from ex-employers who had the same one line confirmation of employment, only to be told computer says no.

saveforthat · 08/03/2025 15:32

IDontHateRainbows · 08/03/2025 13:05

I work in hr and its vanishing rare for absence details to be on a reference.
Most employers provide 'tombstone' refs these days ie dates from/ to, job title.
You may get asked about health issues on a health dec form, but this is usually confidential between you and occ health and you can be selective in what you put.

This.

EmmaMaria · 08/03/2025 16:22

AnSolas · 08/03/2025 15:29

May depend on the industry my last jobs would only give start date and end date not even a role or job title was included.
They dont give anything else and staff are not supposed to give out personal reference either due to risk of being sued or held liable for misconduct in the new job. And phone calls were/could be recorded so phoning out too.

One HR was obliged to go back to school days to prove no " jail time career breaks "😁 and would insist on trying to get a personal reference from ex-employers who had the same one line confirmation of employment, only to be told computer says no.

I agree - that was my point - there is no such thing as what most employers do because all people know is what the employers they know do! There is no evidence to support this oft claimed comment. So telling the OP that most employers do something is entirely useless - all that matters is what the employers she applies to do. I have also seen a few employers who don't ask for detailed references but do as for two more answers - how much sickness absence, and would you employ this person again.

Meant to say too - yes I have seen it happen where an employer has refused to provide detailed references when they are required by the new employer. It is an easy fix - can't prove it then no job!

Picklepower · 08/03/2025 17:24

Many places don't provide details of sickness absence. I also worn in HR and the only places I've found that consistently ask for this information are schools.

Teladi · 08/03/2025 17:37

EmmaMaria · 08/03/2025 15:07

I would be interested in you providing the evidence about what "most employers do" because this is oft repeated but never evidenced. I have literally never come across any employer who doesn't ask for a detailed reference and some employers must ask for (and receive) a detailed reference.

I am in the IT industry. At my work only "tombstone" references are given and sought as part of background checking - they also do criminal record, sanctions etc but absences are not part of that

IDontHateRainbows · 08/03/2025 17:52

EmmaMaria · 08/03/2025 16:22

I agree - that was my point - there is no such thing as what most employers do because all people know is what the employers they know do! There is no evidence to support this oft claimed comment. So telling the OP that most employers do something is entirely useless - all that matters is what the employers she applies to do. I have also seen a few employers who don't ask for detailed references but do as for two more answers - how much sickness absence, and would you employ this person again.

Meant to say too - yes I have seen it happen where an employer has refused to provide detailed references when they are required by the new employer. It is an easy fix - can't prove it then no job!

Edited

Its not entirely useless at all I work in this field so have a pretty good grasp of what most employers do/ what the range of responses employers give is/what the industry norms and best practice is.

Its also pretty rare for an employer to withdraw a job offer just because the previous employer gives a tombstone reference - if they have found a candidate they like enough to offer to then why would they shoot themselves in the foot with this approach? And i've worked in industries requiring security vetting as part of an offer, so long as the employee can prove they've been working for company x over period y-z then that's sufficient (which a tombstone reference would verify)

AnSolas · 08/03/2025 18:34

Cant prove what?

Anything over and above dates has to be justified and collected by permission.

Seeking details of Sickness and denial could be disability discrimination.

And employ again is not a great question as it only really works if the ex-er is willing to says no.
And in some cases there is no way to answer that as HR will not keep a record of it for legal reasons and other staff move on.

In the end the will the ee fit in here is what probation is for.

MuggleMe · 08/03/2025 18:48

I honestly thought employers couldn't ask about sickness until they'd given you the job and then only to understand what support you need.

EmmaMaria · 08/03/2025 20:29

MuggleMe · 08/03/2025 18:48

I honestly thought employers couldn't ask about sickness until they'd given you the job and then only to understand what support you need.

That is not entirely true. They should not ask about sickness until after an offer has been made. They can withdraw the offer if they don't like the answer. Whether that constitutes a lawful action is for the law to decide - but short of a possible action on disability discrimination they certainly can refuse to employ somebody because of their sickness record, and even if the person has a disability that does not make them immune. If someone with a disability, for example, regularly has 4 months off sick every year, then the employer may not be able to support that. Only a tribunal can determine whether their action was lawful or not.

@IDontHateRainbows Its also pretty rare for an employer to withdraw a job offer just because the previous employer gives a tombstone reference - if they have found a candidate they like enough to offer to then why would they shoot themselves in the foot with this approach? And i've worked in industries requiring security vetting as part of an offer, so long as the employee can prove they've been working for company x over period y-z then that's sufficient (which a tombstone reference would verify)
That may be the fact for you. It isn't for me. As I have said repeatedly, claiming that "most employers" act in certain ways or don't do certain things is meaningless. If, for example, security vetting is part and parcel of an offer, then perhaps a basic reference is fine - alongside an awful lot more vetting that is undertaken. In my area of work basic references are in the most part not accepted, and in many cases not legally acceptable.

Anyway, people can argue angels dancing on a pinhead for ever - the only thing that matters is what the OP's employers / potential employers do. What anyone else does is irrelevant.

IDontHateRainbows · 09/03/2025 09:06

EmmaMaria · 08/03/2025 20:29

That is not entirely true. They should not ask about sickness until after an offer has been made. They can withdraw the offer if they don't like the answer. Whether that constitutes a lawful action is for the law to decide - but short of a possible action on disability discrimination they certainly can refuse to employ somebody because of their sickness record, and even if the person has a disability that does not make them immune. If someone with a disability, for example, regularly has 4 months off sick every year, then the employer may not be able to support that. Only a tribunal can determine whether their action was lawful or not.

@IDontHateRainbows Its also pretty rare for an employer to withdraw a job offer just because the previous employer gives a tombstone reference - if they have found a candidate they like enough to offer to then why would they shoot themselves in the foot with this approach? And i've worked in industries requiring security vetting as part of an offer, so long as the employee can prove they've been working for company x over period y-z then that's sufficient (which a tombstone reference would verify)
That may be the fact for you. It isn't for me. As I have said repeatedly, claiming that "most employers" act in certain ways or don't do certain things is meaningless. If, for example, security vetting is part and parcel of an offer, then perhaps a basic reference is fine - alongside an awful lot more vetting that is undertaken. In my area of work basic references are in the most part not accepted, and in many cases not legally acceptable.

Anyway, people can argue angels dancing on a pinhead for ever - the only thing that matters is what the OP's employers / potential employers do. What anyone else does is irrelevant.

So you are saying that learning about industry norms/ best practice/ trends / benchmarking etc is completely meaningless for those in the profession? Rubbish.

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