Impostor syndrome at work. Do you ever get it?

[Croissantsfordinner]

I never used to have this when I was more junior but since being promoted to a more senior grade and managing my own team (it’s been almost 5 years now) I have started to suffer from that.
I feel as if I don’t fully deserve my role/title and as if the team think I am not worthy and colleagues speak behind my back sometimes. I have got absolutely nothing to prove this and my line manager seems to have a good opinion of me, which is reflected in the reviews.
I am starting to think I have a real issue, am I alone in feeling this way?

It's really common - my company paid for coaching and she really helped me. Send me a PM if you want her details but I think she might have gone in-house somewhere since. Worth a shot as she was very reasonable.

Yes I did and I hate to say that it didn’t get any easier 😬 as PP has said though, it is so common.

Yes I had it for a number of years. It's disappeared now I'm thinking of retiring 🤣

Yes, sometimes in the last year since starting a new job in a new sector I knew nothing about. I know I'm doing OK, I've been told numerous times, but it's sometimes hard to shake off the feeling that I'm rubbish and don't deserve to be there.

I find myself reassuring the younger women in my department (which is very male dominated) when they confide that they have a touch of imposter syndrome too. I'm quite a bit older so I've been around the workplace block a few times, and I encourage and support the younger women as best I can.

Yes, since joining a large company with lots of young and bright people; however is not all they time

It's very common, everybody gets it. The bigger the role, the larger the team, all eyes looking at you, you feel slightly out of your depth in a new role or a new situation, who wouldn't get it. Even the people who you look on as being so confident and brilliant that they couldn't possibly suffer from it, have it. I've known directors of FTSE 100's with 1000's of people working for them suffer from it. Imposter syndrome is what normal people get, those fit to lead, who are reflective about their performance and how they come across, people who think they have something to learn and they don't know it all, in other words people who are good leaders or are in the process of becoming excellent leaders suffer from it. The people you have to worry about it are those in leadership roles who claim they've never had it, the people who think they are brilliant and that their staff couldn't do without them. It's very telling that the people who suffer from it keep on suffering from it periodically across their career. These are the people who keep getting promoted into larger roles because they are good at what they do. Just to comfort you, you will start to lose the imposter syndrome in the years leading up to your retirement when you've just about mastered everything. It reminds of the joke about a very experienced acrobat who tells their audience that the next trick they've been practising for 40 years but now they are too old to do it.

I used to get it as a junior lawyer working in law firms. But that was mostly because the environment and work style wasn't a fit for me and was just a means to an end until I found a more pleasant and suitable way to practise law. Which for me is being sole counsel in a small organisation. I have never felt like an imposter once in my current job. Though definitely it's an age and experience thing as well, and realising that the people around you are no longer more knowledgeable, polished or experienced and that you know just as much as them about a lot of things and a lot more about others, and it is just as inportant if not more important that your voice is heard.

Yes absolutely. If you don't know the song 'The Man' by Taylor Swift - have a listen, it always pulls me out of whatever imposter syndrome/work insecurity funk I've gotten myself into!

Reading your comments is very reassuring! Do you also get the “are my colleagues talking of me/thinking I am incapable” thoughts?

Yes, the fear that people are questioning your ability and judgement goes with it to some extent. Often when leading a team it will have people with different skills, strengths and capabilities. The term don't own a dog and bark yourself, it can be very apt in some situations. Take me for example, I used to lead large technical teams. Was I good technically? Perhaps once I was back in the 90's but I then went into team management and lost my technical edge. Did my team talk behind my back, yes they did when the team thought I made ill-informed decisions. I then started to lean on their technical strengths which were far more current than mine. It then didn't matter that my technical ability had lapsed as I had my team to rely on. My skill turned into one of elicitation and gaining consensus and agreement across the team on what they thought was the right approach. It was also my job to clear the way, the blockages speaking corporately, I fed the gods and kept senior management off their backs so they could get on and do their jobs. In my case, the voices then quietened as they realised what my skill and strength was to the team.