Seeking Advice on Balancing

[naturesbuds]

DH is in the higher rate pay bracket and while I am genuinely happy for his success. DH pays the bills do enjoy time together the onus of managing our child's activities and personal

I can't help but feel a bit jealous. In the lower tax bracket my income mainly goes towards activities for our child. Feeling the pressure to chase money to enable our son to participate in various activities and have funds left for myself. As a result, I've burnt myself working in jobs with little or no progress path . Feeling like let myself down unable to secure a higher paid role which has added to my stress and frustrations. I would appreciate some advice

You need to talk to DH about rebalancing family finances. It’s not fair that the cost of childcare and activities falls on you. They are his child too!

There’s basically two approaches you can take:
1/ all income goes into joint pot, you then take an equal amount out each for personal spending
2/ you pay into join pot in proportion to income, you both get to keep any extra to spend on yourself

all childcare and child activities come out of the joint pot. If it’s something like taking them out for lunch then at minimum the child’s lunch comes out of joint pot

With 2 the higher earner ends up with more personal spending money.

Which is best for your family depends a lot on circumstances. If one partner can’t work or is on reduced hours due to childcare then I think (1) is fairest. If the lower earner is lower earner through total choice eg they have chosen a more “fun” career or just don’t want to work f/t then (2) may be better. In your case it sounds like moving to a total joint pot with each getting spending money back out would be better.

Hi Daffidale,

The suggestion of the joint pot is a good and fair one thanks this is the one that work. Really need some light on this situation thanks