I crash and burn every busy period - do I quit and try to get a NMW job?

[Whatdoldo]

I work in a professional job earning c£50k FTE (but work part time hours). Theres a crunch point twice a year with important deadlines, and every time these roll around I’m a mess and unable to function so end up working all hours but really unproductively.

I’m such an over thinker and I just can’t cope with the thought of “I should have done this weeks ago” but then procrastinate because I’m already late but then this spirals because I’m worried about being behind, procrastinating and feeling dreadful.

This has happened over 20 years I’ve had similar jobs (different employers) which to me suggests I’m just terribly suited to the role.

Nothing else is similar without the deadlines, so I’m at square one if I do leave the industry.

I can’t help but think I just need a job that every day is a day of its own (shop work/fast food etc) and that one less than perfect day has no bearing on the next. This will come with a massive pay cut and so much less flexibility but I’m struggling so much I think I need to do it.

Has anyone done this and not regretted it?

I think if you change jobs that would be trying to provide an external solution to what is an internal problem.

It won't fix the internal problem (and you will just be a lot poorer!)

You'd do better to invest in working on the internal problem.

Do you not have a manager and a team who can support you through the deadline, even if it is just fellow feeling about the awfulness? If you are feeling unconfident and have no support that is not going to help.

Sometimes deadlines just are awful. I think pretty much every personal tax compliance person, for example, hates January because it's so full-on and last-minute. It's not really about the person, it's just how it often is in those teams. Your deadlines may just be like that and it's not you at all, or only partly.

@Whatdoldo do you think this method could help with prioritising?

or this

Have you tried talking to your manager about this? Saying that you really struggle at these times and you would like some support? Perhaps they could set you up with a mentor.

If not, I echo what others have said about finding a coach. It is worth investing some money trying to solve this problem, as you will lose out so much financially if you go down to NMW and it will have an impact on your pension too.

I just want to be told what to do and do it - micromanaged to the extreme. If someone could feed me each task that I need to do with my current job I’d love the technical side only, I just can’t manage the admin/organisation at all (which is half the job!).

OP, perhaps having an app or project management software could help you with breaking down tasks and tasks reminders. Can you ask your department to set it up?

Well, you sound exactly like me, and I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 40.
I'm on medication now, and it does help with staying focused on tasks, etc.

the “easiest” role I had was years ago when I was essentially data inputting/validation. There were different deadlines during the day, but I was essentially “fed” work and just kept going until it was done. Rarely overtime or anything like that. I wasn’t stressed, but my god I was bored to tears!

most of those types of roles have since been automated anyway, but you could look at some of the work from home/remote/online work - tasks are posted and you can pick up as many as you like or not, and work whatever hours you want. But you’re competing against others to pick tasks so it’s not guaranteed income per month.

Mind mapping software or similar may help here. Essentially helps you plot and plan, working backwards starting with the goal, then converts it into manageable steps. Look at idea mapper pro. This has been recommended to me by access to work. I'm autistic with ADHD and hugely struggle with executive function and procrastination.

I also have my outlook calender open on a browser in front of me at all times, with all the important bits in. I have a paper week per view diary open above my keyboard for the littler stuff.

I also use the acronym JFDI in big letters stuck to my monitor. Essentially, don't put little things aside to do later, cos you won't. Just fucking do it. 😉

Chat GPT is a very good side pilot. I use it as a second brain. Even if I know I know how to do something I will just ask it for a list on how to do it.
Really good for replacing the working memory burden.

What else - I also recently had EMDR therapy for some long unresolved trauma in childhood.

Side benefit - I no longer get the cortisol hit when I am crunching up against a deadline. I strongly believe this is highly addictive (have worked to deadlines for years) - it creates a well trodden pathway in the brain that is very hard to avert. We know, we just know, that when it kicks in we will have the focus to deliver from the cortisol rush.

I'm only at the beginning or recovery but I think the more practise you have at averting the burnout then the more you develop a different pathway for the brain.

The replies here are so interesting. I feel similar - work in finance and always leave things to the last minute as I need the pressure to focus but then can’t cope with the pressure. I like the idea of working in a cafe so once I’ve served my last drink of the day, I can leave and not have anything hanging over me. Also like the idea of being busy all day as I get so bored in my current role on the days without pressure - but completely get I would burn out there and am not sure I’d cope well with a bad manager or customers

I’ve always found that a change in job does help for a while - I’m more motivated somehow and can focus when things are new and there’s lots to learn - I think the fear of failing completely stops me procrastinating. It’s when I’ve been somewhere for a while that I struggle to keep focussed

Do you think you might have ADHD, OP?

Have you considered ADHD? The behaviour you've described there is very typical (along with other symptoms of course). You don't have to be hyperactive to have ADHD.

I have learnt to be better about not procrastinating. It can be done.

@InattentiveADHD DD is (diagnosed) autistic and highly likely my DDad and DBro are too although neither interested in a diagnosis but yes there is highly likely something going on.

I used to teach and before that TAd so ADD has been on my radar for a while, infact an ADHD student I worked with regularly, asked me if I was 😂 . The work environment was pretty toxic towards the end but I think I suited the short sharp hour lessons whereas I'm doing an admin, WFH role where I manage my own day and that normally ends up me pootling around doing F all during the day when I'm meant to be available and then going back to my desk in the evening to do the work I was meant to do late when my brain is actually in gear. I need a more reactive job again I think.

This also sounds like possible ADHD. ADHD brains only work when one of the following are present: novelty (eg new job), urgency (eg imminent deadline (often kicks in a little too late to actually get the thing done without staying up all night with the risk you have no contingency), interest (eg it's a topic or hobby that you find fascinating or challenging). With interest though you can't usually sustain it for long periods and interests and hobbies will come and go.

"infact an ADHD student I worked with regularly, asked me if I was"

That's always quite telling! We can usually spot each other a mile off ime!!!

Do you mind sharing some tips please?

Two things that have helped me are to make a to list last thing on Friday and first thing every day. Then do the thing you least want to do first. I always put the thing I didn't want to to do last then surprise surprise it moved to the next day!
Also just consciously deciding to stop or reduce it, accepting that it is a bad habit of mine but that I am going to try and change because it doesn't serve me well.

I agree about doing the thing you don't want to do first. I'm never normally motivated to do it, but I think of it as me versus the anxiety or stress of not doing it. It might be that the task has no immediate negative consequences, but there's another task that is going to become urgent and then I won't have time to do the task I'm procrastinating over and then it will become a problem. For example if I'm procrastinating over laundry or food shopping, consequences will be running out of clothes, looking shit and making a bad impression, or wasting money on takeaway which is gonna eat up my financial goals of retiring one day. I think it taps into an instinctual need to be safe which I have tuned into more in my 40s. Whereas in my younger years I wanted excitement.