Is this odd, or am I overreacting?

[chatterbox30]

Context: started a new job, where I was under the impression from interview, it was flexible working between office, visits, meetings and home, with varying start and finish times between 7am-7pm managing own diary etc. In corporate line of work.

I started a new job, Monday the first day was okay, everyone was chatty and asking about my background, where I worked before etc. As expected. I assumed for first couple of weeks I would be office based 9-5ish settling in. I got laptop, phone and was mostly left to plod on with setting it up.

My second day Tuesday, I came in about 8.45am to find everyone in, and I felt I was late, they were all rushing around and barely said good morning... Again left to plod on with online training rubbish, all the mandatory check list training.

Wednesday I got in for 8.15am and I was the only one there? When they all arrived in at 8.45am, again they barely said hello. I was under the impression I had to stay till everyone else left st 5.30pm, which meant I was in 'over time' / 'flexi'.... No mention of claiming this back? Again left to carry on boring training.

Towards the end of the week and this week, I have been shadowing a couple of colleagues, as expected, travelling with them to meetings in other buildings, when I attempted to make conversation about anything other than work, they have ignored me and sat in radio silence...
For Example, I mentioned whilst driving with one colleague, how I liked a singer playing on the radio, and they didn't reply! We just sat there in silence till I asked if they come this building for work often, they replied yes!!

They have all said they prefer coming into the office to work (all older in late 30-50, no kids/pets and live fairly close). I am 28, live 30mins away have 2 kids and if I can work from home, I'm going to jump at the chance!! I prefer the quietness at home and I can get loads done.

I had an induction meeting with my line manager, who went through a generic checklist, and ticked off flexible working, I queried the times and logging my hours, which was cleared up... I asked about wfh, and travel and was told the department expectation is 3 days in office, 2 wfh. He then proceeded to go on about other teams having to be present in the office 5 days.

Does this sounds odd or am I being dramatic? Debating if I should run for the hills or stick it out and hope I'll be left to my own devices. I'm just not getting a good energy, I'm in my 6 month probation period, and I doubt they'll find anything to stack me with, but I'm so uncertain and it's making me feel uncomfortable.

I would suggest that the reason they don't seen to want to engage with you is that one of them was up for promotion but did not get it and you were taken on instead.

In my organisation we are able to work flexibly as long as we do our hours and work. Some days I work 7-4, some 7-3 other days 9-5 or 8-4 or 9.30-5.30. As long as we do hours and get our work done nobody bats an eyelid about what time people come in and leave as we all need to work different hours depending on our own situations.

Yes... As I came from a very small team, and worked mostly remote, so thought a mix with a larger team may be nice. At interview itnwas very heavy on what a great team and how well established it is and how different people have different specialisms so you can lean on them for support- in reality it seems very different.

Just an update - thanks for everyones comments. There has been another new lady started, just met her today probably we've been in and out with all this crazy snow!

We had a good get to know you chat this morning and nipped out for a takeaway coffee, she's 30s, no kids, but felt the exact same. The team wasn't massively welcoming so glad I was imagining things at least. Nice to have an ally, it seems.

I left a job I’d been in for over a decade to work somewhere that sounds a bit like this. Less camaraderie, more old-fashioned dress and presenteeism. Rigid routines. At my old place I’m pretty sure most people won’t battle in through the snow and ice without good reason - at this place, it’s taken as read you struggle in. Same with sickness. Although it made me feel uncomfortable to go against the grain at first, I just decided to start working flexibly as discussed at interview. And I wfh for anything worse than a mild sniffle. Nobody has said a thing to me.

The lack of positive, friendly culture is worse to me, though, and I can’t see this being a long-term role. I’d actually rather five days in the office with people who I enjoy seeing than two or three sitting silently typing.

In terms of culture, I don’t agree with it at all, but some people can be weird with newcomers. I’m in year two of a new job. Last year was rubbish because quite a lot of people were standoffish, and not very kind. This year has been much better with everyone being really friendly. Another woman has joined this year - who I’ve been SUPER welcoming and kind to because I know what it’s like) & everyone who was standoffish and unkind to me has been the same to her. Some people are just weird, but I’m glad I stuck it out because I do really enjoy my job (I’ll just never really be close to/trust the meanies from last year!!)

This, which is very much how it is within the majority of the business I work for (unless you are shop floor)

Run for the hills. Regardless of flexible working clarity, if you’re not getting a good vibe about colleagues etc then it sounds like it’s not right for you.

If the contract is 7-7 flexible hours/location then hopefully you'll settle into a pattern that suits you. In my first week at my remote job I had to go to the office 3 times, which was a random one-off but it freaked me out a bit tbh, you never really know whether what's presented at interview is the actuality!
The red flag for me would be the unfriendly staff though. I would give it a month and see.

Civil service by any chance? Certain work places are having to tread VERY lightly when discussing wfh/ flexible working lately. They were even debating wfh in the lords

Giving monosyllabic answers and ignoring questions is a form of bullying in my opinion, it is deliberately done to make someone feel uncomfortable and try to establish a hierarchy, ie, they don’t need to respond to you as you are beneath them and why on earth are you even talking to them…. Form an alliance with the new work colleague and other newcomers, after a few months there will be enough of ye to be able to stand up to them and maybe even turn the tables. Also if someone ignores your question, repeat it in a louder/ clearer voice to make damn sure they can’t pretend they didn’t hear it

Probation is standard for us in NHS, so I wouldn't consider this a red flag....... unless its not usual in other areas.

3:2 IS flexible working. It doesn't sound like there is a clear start time, as long as your working day is within 7am-7pm. I'd do what suits you within this and not worry about what hours other people choose to work within that

*left to plod on with online training rubbish.....

The energy you're getting is because of what you're putting out, even in subconsciously.

I'd say it sounds pretty flexible. You choose your start/finish time within the core hours. And work from home is roughly 2 days but as you become more established you could probably do more.

It probably feels a bit strange while you are new but will be great down the line.

I didn't leave a job that didn't give me good energy, and I wound up incredibly depressed. Like could barely make it out of bed on Monday mornings. It was awful. My lesson: always trust your gut!

I could have written your post OP 18 months ago.

While unfriendliness and WFH may be separate issues, may not. I found that wanting to WFH went down like a cup of cold sick with a team that liked being in the office.

Did you talk about WFH on the first day with colleagues? Perhaps previous colleague had form for shirking on WFH days and unfortunately they have assumed you may be the same.

From what you have said I would guess Civil Service. If so contract/policy maybe along the lines of subject to business needs. While you may indeed be able to WFH two days a week, the reality may be that it causes friction in the team. Alternatively you be more productive on WFH days so team see it as a non issue. Only time will tell.