Work burnout? Depression? Lacking drive and motivation?

[TheBlueRobin]

Would love to get some thoughts on this? Burnout? Depression? Or something else?
I’m 31, have been working full time for nearly 10 years, working in HE as a programme manager, having worked in various other public sector orgs (HE, local authorities) and worked my way up, slogging away at different roles and going above and beyond. I’m now on a reasonably good salary, overseeing a small team. I realise I am very fortunate with my employer, doing a rewarding role, excellent team and nice colleagues, excellent work/life balance, good pension, good and caring culture. A lot of uncertainty in the sector but nothing I’m losing sleep over.
Here’s the thing. I’ve lost all drive and motivation. On the surface, everything is fine. I’m supporting my team, delivering on outputs and KPIs, I know the right things to say to senior management to celebrate successes and I get on with colleagues. However, it feels like a slog. Meeting heavy days make me feel so drained and yet I feel so tired and restless on meeting free days. I never used to be like this. I don’t get Sunday scaries. I’m just…apathetic?
Outside of work, I feel so much more motivated with cooking, housework, personal interests, seeing friends etc. But with work, I feel like I just have to put on a mask and muddle through.
For context, I went through a bereavement two years ago when I lost my Mum. Three days after my Mum’s funeral, I was told my fixed term contract would not be renewed in six months’ time and was recommended to apply for a vacancy at the same grade I was suitable for. I applied, got the job and completely threw myself in for the first 12 months – delivering success outputs and managing a brand new team.
I feel like I’ve run out of steam and lacking the drive I once did? I have just returned from an extended holiday, so there’s an element of holiday blues too, but I felt like this before. There isn’t really anything else I want to do. The role and sector suits my values, experience and skills set and on paper it is my ideal role.
Has anyone else felt like this? What do I do?

That's a tricky one op

Im sorry you lost your mum.I lost my dad a couple of years ago, and remember a more general grey cloud - it wasn't specific to work- although it definitely was also affected. But could your work stagnation be linked to grief, do you think?

Could you get a career coach, or do your work offer similar support? It sounds possibly like you platto-ed (I have no idea how to spell that) and that you're not getting challenged enough?

On paper it sounds ideal but that your heart isn't in it at the moment. Could you look for promotion opportunities? You sound great at what you do, is riding this phase out an option? or looking for a work related course to add to your skillset - which already sounds very impressive.

I've no experience in your sector but just posted what sprang to mind. Good luck x

I have found that after a few years I get "bored" - the challenges are mostly in the past and even success becomes "normal". At which point it is time to crack out the vacancies sheets!

Thanks, some interesting suggestions here.

I don't normally stay in a role for longer than two years (and it will be two years in March) so wondering if I am a bit restless. The programme is funded until July so tempted to see what happens early next year and decide my next move.

I recently did a leadership course and been studying for personal interest outside of work so maybe it's just finding that balance.

@TheBlueRobin when you say "The role and sector suits my values, experience and skills set and on paper it is my ideal role", what do you mean by "values"? Do you mean what you think is important in a professional life or in life? Because I think there may be a discrepancy there.

Values can change, especially after a big life event like a bereavement. We motor along being productive but the ground has subtly shifted underneath us and what we think is important to us, or what was important just doesn't really have the same meaning anymore. After my DF died this snuck up on me, I wasn't depressed per se but different things became important to me.

Have you come across The Happiness Trap by Dr Russ Harris? It is a booked based on ACT therapy and talks a lot about values, defining them and living close to them (among other things). I think it's a good read.

Thanks that is helpful. I work in an organisation and on a programme that looks to tackle inequalities and prioritise social impact which has always been a huge driver for me. Similarly I have a lot of flexibility, autonomy and a good work/life balance. That in itself hasn't changed. I just have stopped caring about work altogether.

What is your personal situation? Do you have kids?

No kids. Live with my partner and we have a mortgage. Until recently I was the breadwinner but now my partner has started a new role and we're on similar pay