Career change at 56 (from HE) - advice needed!

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I'm absolutely done with my job. It's reasonably well paid, but I have to commute up to 3.5 hours each way (minimum 3 days a week). Sometimes I stay in a hotel, but generally the costs are crippling. We can't move. I'm constantly tired. My line manager is a bully (I've complained but too exhausted to get into a battle) and the workload and demands for everything to be 'excellent' is getting worse year on year. I have no work-life balance and my youngest will be going off to Uni next year. My pension is crap as I spent years studying and qualifying and bringing up 4 children and being on short-term contracts waiting for the permanent one (yes, this is HE). I have debt, I'm trapped, and I'm on anti-depressants and sleeping tablets because of work. Going part-time wouldn't cut down the commute, so the costs would still be the same. I have no set hours - the work just fills the hours and for all of us weekend and evening working is the norm. I can't afford to retire and I can't afford to just hand in my notice. HE is also like a cult - to step out of the sector means you are a 'failed academic'.
I am published as a writer but haven't for a few years as my workload is too much and my contract is teaching only so no research leave.
I guess I would love to hear from people who have stepped out of the sector (even at this age!), or who have any advice about career change (work from home?) - I've lost sight of my (transferable) skills over the years and feel totally ground down. If I went into school teaching I would need to take an additional qualification so that is not an option to just go into that (and to be honest, my sisters are teachers in schools and I think I'm too old to go into that environment now!). If anyone has any words of support, or advice, or their own experiences to share, please do. I'm feeling desperately sad right now and worried I'm slipping into depression.
Thanks in advance.

I don't know how much help I can be but I couldn't ignore your post, it really resonated. What an absolute hero doing that commute and managing the workload etc with four children. I'm so sorry you find yourself in this position, the way the whole system works can be so cruel, keeping us hanging on for that 'dream' permanent job which turns out not to be so dreamy in practice. I'm also on a teaching only contract and now with a toddler I'm increasingly thinking about other paths forwards.

I think what helps the most is perhaps the hardest thing to get - some breathing space to reflect on what still sparks interest for you professionally that would transfer to another environment. If you could afford a couple of sessions with a career coach who understands HE that might be helpful. As you say, the pressures of school teaching are unlikely to feel like a relief from what you've been doing but do you feel teaching is an area of strength/interest?

At my uni there are lots of central professional services roles supporting and adjacent to education/teaching and learning/students, some well paid and with good opportunities to progress. Is there a uni nearer you with such roles that would cut the commute? There would be a loss of freedom but it could be a way to use your experience and still feel you were contributing to an overall educational mission. However you are at the whims of often ego-driven and ignorant higher management and some of the central politics is ridiculous. I think you'd have to develop a mindset of doing a certain role and stepping away when things were beyond your control.

Beyond that, there are definitely options but I think it will depend on your strengths and interests eg coaching others, doing research etc etc.

I really hope you manage to find space to focus on yourself to move forwards from what sounds like a really tough spot, even if you need some time off sick. Be kind to yourself!

Are you able to move into administration. It should allow you an exit and breathing space and will keep money coming in.