Hi,
I work in a role where I’m like a Probation Officer but not - think managing a caseload, having to do solo home visits to them, evidence any interaction with them, partake in meetings around their children if they have them and they’re on the radar for services, be the POC for their life issues and trying to sort them out. Very fast paced and fire fighting at times!
I’ve been off sick for a period of time - I have ADHD and absolutely burnt myself out. A mix of putting too much pressure on myself to always do more and never being told you were doing a good job fuelling that, dealing with lots of trauma and awful things, an incident where someone from my past personal life turned up at work as a volunteer (they’d previously assaulted me), reporting them, being assured they’d be removed, only for a few months later, to find out they were sneakily still kept on.
Management was also massively triggering to my ADHD - not being given answers to questions I’d asked until days later, despite the message being read and non-standard appointments being made last minute for me, without asking me first. If I couldn’t do it (but offering an alternative), being assured it was fine and I didn’t need to, but then going ahead and contacting the client to book it anyway and me still being asked to do it. There’s another manager who just completely ignores anything sent to her.
I was involved in an RTC less than a week ago so now have whiplash. I can’t drive as it’s too painful right now to turn my head. I’ve had to be dragged out of bed by DH. I’m seeing a physio this week. I spoke to work on Sunday and explained.
I said I’m not happy driving (our job is lots of driving between different offices and homes) until I’ve had some physio as I don’t feel safe enough with my limited neck movement. This was agreed with and suggested they just base me out of one place and see if DH could drop me off.
First day back today and within an hour or so, I started being put upon again. I was given a new client to take tomorrow in one place. The day after, they’d also scheduled me to meet another new client at a non-standard location I can’t get to and DH can’t take me as he’s going into his office. They’ve also already booked a third new client in for this week too at a third location. Any new client needs research to assess risks etc and the first appointment can be up to 2 hours, going through all of their life problems.
They also gave me a fourth client who they wanted me to take this week too until I put my foot down and said I’d look at it next week.
I understand you have to get back to work but right away being given 3 new people when I’d been off with burnout seems so much. I’m also a bit useless if I needed to defend myself if anything was to go wrong as I can barely move without jarring it.
They simply told me the days would be long without much to do and have said they’re going to speak to a colleague to see if I can help them with their cases too whilst mine will be low.
We had a team meeting today with 3 managers present and not one of them even acknowledged me, let alone say anything like asking how I was or that it was good to see me back. We recently lost a colleague to suicide and it seems no one has learnt anything.
ANYWAY (!) after all my ranting, what do I do? I don’t want to be in the job but I also don’t want to job hop if I can help it. I’m at a loss as to what I could even go into jobs wise. I love animals and children but not sure what could match my current earnings. I’d even consider studying a degree but I don’t know if this is financially viable with having a mortgage and young children.
Any advice greatly appreciated as I just see myself stuck in this cycle of hating work and it creeping into my home life, sitting on a night anxious about the next day.