Please advise - toxic work environment

[Hope202204]

Dear All, could someone kindly advise if they had similar situation at work and how you dealt with it.
I was made redundant six month ago, came unexpectedly so was a bit of shock especially considering I just bought my first house on my own. I was of course worried about mortgage so accepted first offer I got. During the interview there were a few red flags however I thought I give it benefit of the doubt. Unfortunately now it's been 6 month and those red flags only redder. It seems that everything that was said in the interview is just a lie, I know everyone will be polite at the interview and maybe make something sound not as bad but in this case it's literally the opposite. For example - working hours, been said it's standard 9-6 however main boss demands 24/7 support, including weekends and holidays. At the moment I'm doing 12 hours daily. If I don't respond out of hours he sees it as me not doing my job. Also he demands reporting on whereabouts for the team and times for when people log in last etc, micro management is on another level here, makes me very uncomfortable. I also straggle with how disrespectful he is to the time of everyone, any meetings will be changed at least 3/4 times with no reason and it's me who has to constantly apologise to the clients for this. The boss himself will also constantly question what I do and of course I only do what he requests so constantly confused with this, he doesn't seems to remember that it was what he asked for and even when I show him his message or email he will still refuse to accept it. I decided to address this with him and this is where I kind of left speechless - after explaining all of the above he told me - the reason I'm struggling is because I'm afraid to fail because as immigrants we need to work twice as hard. I'm originally from Ukraine and lived in Uk for 24 years now, of course since the war my life changed forever and became hell as I have family in Ukraine so his comment really left me not knowing what to say. He then simply said Fine take 3 days off then. It didn't sound like I had a choice so I took the days off and while being at home I made a decision to leave, I will keep this to myself of course and will be looking for new role quietly via recruiters and will officially resign after getting a new job offer as I can not be without salary. I'm really dreading this as I heard his reaction will not be nice. I now understand why I found 4 different names on my position from last 2 years in this company.
Do you think I'm doing the right thing? I never gave up on anything before but this place is slowly killing me both physically and mentally.
Would really appreciate any advice or just an opinion on all this!
Thank you x

Log all emails and messages demanding a reply outside of work hours. Log all emails and messages requiring work outside of work hours. Log appointments changed at last minute, examples of rudeness, micromanagement, double-standards, etc. Keep these up your sleeve.
Once you know you have a new job lined up (contract signed, etc) send it to HR.

Have a read of this: www.acas.org.uk/working-time-rules

Exactly what Fraaahnces suggested. My DD did with her last job, she sent the email to HR at the end of her last day.

Thank you for your advice, I have started doing this a few weeks ago. He said for example- Aug was quiet I didn't write to you and I thought that's not true so I took screenshots from teams from 1st Aug to 31 and it came to 86 pics so definitely not quiet. However we don't actually have HR atoll so I won't be able to give it to anyone but I thought it's good to keep for myself just in case.

The writing is on the wall. Toxic environments rarely change unless there is a high level management change.

find a new job & but without a hr department there will no no one to feed back up so just leave and chalk this one up to experience. It’s not you, it’s them. Meanwhile keep all communication neutral and smile & wave. I had a similar manager once - who was validated by their toxic manager.

You are 1000% doing the right thing getting out! The worst place I have ever worked I stayed for far too long because my toxic bully of a manager had eroded my self esteem to a point where I thought I was so useless, nobody else would ever employ me. I was becoming physically ill, once I even threw up before work, at the thought of seeing her. I'm now in a role I love with a fabulous manager on nearly double the salary. You sound bright and pro active, there is a far nicer work environment out there for you, trust me!

Plaster on a big fake smile, be super can do and lovely, and just keep telling yourself you'll soon be out. If he wants to rant and be a dick, let him! Then once you've left name and shame the bastard on Glassdoor.

Thank you everyone for such supportive answers! I have spoken to my original agency who placed me here and they were shocked and of course looking for other roles now, they never worked with this company prior and will not again. I will register with a few more recruiters and hope for a good role soon, I guess after burning myself on this one I'm just afraid how to choose now. I'm on a senior side with over 15y experience and thankfully only had 2 jobs in last 10 years so maybe with a bit of luck I can land another long term role x

Dear Chattie89 I'm very sorry you went through that, so glad you now talking about it this as long forgotten experience so to speak! I definitely feel my health has been affected, I hardly have time to eat, weight dropped badly, cold sores are now constant and sleeping is difficult as I can't seem to turn off buzzing in my head. The pressure is constant and I'm trying to manage it better now that I made a decision to move on. Thank you for sharing x

OP- Are you my twin? This was me 6yrs ago- almost word for word! I'm not from the Ukraine, but also from abroad. I also took a job after being made redundant and they lied in the interview about prospects!
I was expected to start early and finish later than my paid/contracted hours. They'd even book clients in early- without telling me, then yell at me for not being at work at 6am!!! (We opened at 9am)
The handed me business cards. My name was spelt wrong and they'd included my home phone number and personal mobile. I didn't have a work mobile nor was I ever allowed to WFH- but they expected clients to call me at all hours too!
There were hundreds of other things wrong.

I'd been planning my escape when a close relative became very unwell and I was unsure if they'd survive. I resigned and worked my 1 month notice. My boss blamed me, because the notice period on my contract was only 1mth and should have been 3mths- This was THEIR error. They never once asked how my relative was, and everytime I walked into a room- my boss would walk out and avoid me. On my final day, colleagues gave me flowers, but not one of the bosses even said goodbye!

It then came to my final pay- which was wrong. They'd deduced time to attend their own Christmas party- which was after hours. Didn't want to pay overtime for weekend work they insisted I did and SO many other issues. I took advice and was eventually paid correctly. Not before I received a long email about how I was never suitable for the role, and they knew from the start that I would never progress in their company.

My advice, as someone else said, keep logs/times and any evidence you have of what was said/done. Look for another job and count down the days. You will look back at the utter batshittery this place is and wonder how you lasted so long.
Wishing you all the best x

Dear JC03745
I think I'm Lol Thank you so much for sharing your story , it sounds you went through it amazing well, very strong person - I hope I can be too! I think he will react similar way as your ex boss, probably will try same with underpay but to be honest I'm ready to lose some of salary when I have new offer. I've been told by team members that he never gives references so they happy to do one for me if needed. He is obviously not able to say anything positive ever so I rather not even ask. I can't wait to say - this is in the past now!! I hope your family well and you able to see them xx
Thank you again for your support Xx

I meant to say that yes, you are absolutely doing the right thing and you CAN Do it.
I'd forgotten about references. I too was never going to ask my boss for one. I had a colleague who was senior, but not technically my boss. She was happy to provide one, along with the company I was at previously. Strangely, I was with an agency for a different role too! The agency couldn't comment on my day to day work, but could provide dates of employment and feedback they'd had from a previous company.
I hope you find someone very soon x

What's written in your cointract about working hours etc?

If you got the job through a recruitment consultant, perhaps let them know what’s going on there. They’ll likely be asked to find your replacement, so giving them a heads up may be a kind gesture!

Please get out of that job. You’re being used as a slave, not as an employee. Get all your documentation together and speak to citizens advice about your situation,

Please do not stay there.

Dear All,
Thank you for your latest responses. To address a few questions. Working hours - in the contract I actually have No hours, it's the first time I had this and thought it was strange, it has a paragraph saying:

You have no normal working hours but are required to work during normal business hours and
such other hours as may be reasonably necessary for the proper performance of your duties
for the Group.
4.2. You agree that the duration of your working time is not measured or pre-determined and that
the statutory maximum average working time of 48 hours a week shall not apply to your
employment with the Company and that your average working time may therefore exceed 48
hours a week. You shall not be entitled to receive any additional remuneration for work outside
your minimum hours. The parties each agree that your employment falls within the scope of
regulation 20 of the Working Time Regulations 1998.
Regarding Recruitment agency - I have spoken to them, I thought it's better to let them know the situation and ask to help find another role, they were shocked after I told them what's been happening and said unfortunately they never had this firm as a client before so had no idea, they of course said they will not deal with this firm again. Funny enough my recruiter said she thought the interviewing process was most disrespectful she ever seen - they were keeping me home for 3 days saying interview is on today at XXpm and then keep changing the time and then moved to next day, same thing , waiting all day but by end day they move again to next day. Now that I have been here long enough to see that's how every person is treated, that's why I struggle to constantly apologise for wasting everyone time.
Thank you again for kind words of support, I'm checking new roles daily and applying, fingers crossed not long before I have a new role xx

First things first is there a union? If so contact them as he is way out of line in many respects.

1. What does your contract say if it says 9-6 do not work any more hours outside of this unless they are willing to pay you.
2. The comments he made are racist and are not acceptable in any respect! Tell him as such and advise you will not accept any further comments like this.

3 save any an all interactions email phone text whatever. However, it's best to get everything in writing to keep as evidence if needed. Put point one and two into an email and CC HR in.

The 48hour rule law and cannot be exceed except for special circumstances and if a staff member wishes to opt out. Pretty sure you can't just stick it in a contract and that's that

He said you need to work twice as hard because you're an immigrant? If so, this is an unacceptable racist comment and should be taken to HR - along with all the rest of the unreasonable demands of you. You should not expected to be on call 24/7.
I hope you find something new ASAP as that place sounds awful!!

I'm so sorry @Hope202204 , you sound lovely and in a really awkward position. This boss sounds horrendous and really unprofessional.
I hope you can find another job and leave that place soon. It sounds bad for your health.
Wishing you the best of luck - you deserve better!

Dear LinaLouLa, absolutely agree with you, the comment was definitely a new one for me. This is a small firm with no HR, I think this is why I'm candidate number 4 in only two years for this role, every person lasted 6month ish because there is no one to address the issues with. It's basically a one man set up for all the rules and decisions.

Dear MissMoan, you are too kind! Thank you very much, it honestly helps just to read such supportive words, you have a beautiful heart!

I completely agree you just need to get out of there. And it's not you it's them.

However, after the extra hours are they still paying you at least minimum wage? It would be worth talking to ACAS about that if you're not getting minimum wage equivalent.

That’s just what I was thinking!
Definitely worth contacting Acas regarding hours/ pay/ his comments and your contract. It may not even be legal and you may have a case for constructive dismissal.
Acas also have a helpline https://www.acas.org.uk.

Good luck Op

Dear All, wishing everyone a great beginning to 2025!! Just wanted to share wonderful news and very happy to confirm I managed to find a really good new role! 🙏🏻Company is lovely, has a big emphasis on well being of the team so provide good benefits and work life balance. I signed new contract and resigned from old job just before going for Xmas break so had two weeks of my notice period used up at home. Have 4 more weeks with old job and new one stating Feb! I of course asked if my notice period could be reduced if new person starts but my boss, as expected, was not very happy about the whole thing so for now I'm gonna finish work in Jan and maybe take last week as sick leave, will be nice to have a few days break before starting new role.
I wanted to say a Big Thank you to All of You for your amazing words of encouragement and support!! it helped me massively not to lose hope and keep pushing for interviews etc I hope this new journey will be successful and I give it my very best of course 🫶🏻

Yay well done!! ✊