Advice needed- not being allowed to WFH on the same basis as team member.

[AngeloMysterioso]

A colleague of mine went on mat leave for 15 months and upon returning to work was allowed to wfh for another (roughly, I can’t remember exact dates) 15 months because she was breastfeeding. So in total she was on ML/WFH for 2 and a half years.

I am returning to work this week after being on ML for just over 11 months. I’m still breastfeeding, so I made the same request to WFH as my colleague did (almost word for word, she forwarded me the email she sent to our seniors when she made the request). However I have been told I can work from home only until the end of the year.

I feel a bit aggrieved that I’m only being given one fifth of the length of time my colleague was allowed to work from home for- particularly as I’m already taking four months less ML. Compared to my colleague’s two and a half years total of not being in the office, I’ll only have been at home 14 months.

Is there any way I can push back about this without creating a load of bad blood and friction? I feel like they set a precedent with the length of time they allowed my colleague to wfh for, and while I may not necessarily want to be out of the office for quite as long as she was, it doesn’t feel very fair that they’re giving me such a significantly shorter time period.

I think they realised your colleague ripped the piss out of it and won’t be so stupid again.

a classic case of ‘one spoiling it for all’

Who is looking after the baby while you work? If you intend to have the baby at home without any care arrangements, I can see why they wouldn't agree.

You can't look after a baby and work at the same time. Both need your full attention.

They probably realised that your colleague wfh so much did t work well for them, so they’re reluctant to do it again.

Tbf, if you’re breastfeeding your baby, you’re not working.

Most likely their overall policy towards WFH has changed in this time period. Most orgs have significantly reduced WFH latitude lately. Unless you think you are being discriminated against on the basis of a protected characteristic, I.e. white employees are still being allowed to WFH to enable breastfeeding/expressing but employees of colour aren't, I don't think you will get much of anywhere protesting.

Assuming she came back from ML more than 18m ago, then it was approved while a lot of places still had COVID restrictions in place and we're more generous WFH in general. A lot of places have only made people come back to the office in the last year.

Do you do a more customer facing role? There could be other reasons. I don't think you should be angry at the colleague (as per first reply) who has even sent you her email to copy, there's no reason to think she did anything wrong.

Sorry it would probably have been pertinent to include in my OP that I work nights, so my DC are mostly asleep and husband is home as well.

They have a duty to provide you with somewhere suitable for pumping at work. Have you talked through how they are going to facilitate this?

Unfortunately they don’t have to offer the same wfh policies if their wfh policies have moved on.

I would work with them to ensure you have a suitable area to pump and store milk. This set up is pretty common in our offices and women make up 25% of the workforce so not particularly women focussed!

Are you WFH so you can pump during the day in privacy, or is someone planning to bring the baby to you when you need to feed?
Or are you planning to be in sole charge of the baby while also working?

If your co worker did the latter, then maybe your company realised how unproductive they were as its not possible to look after a 1 year old while working.

If you are planning to do one of the former, then maybe explain this to your manager to make it clear you are not using WFH in place of childcare.

Yeah I think you’ve missed the boat for flexible WFH to be honest, now the push is very much for people to be back in the office as much as possible in a way it simply wasn’t a few years ago.

Plus being at home for breastfeeding presumably means baby will also be at home and even the most flexible of employers wouldn’t be happy with that.

That was a bit ridiculous of them to allow wfh for breastfeeding. I mean, how often in the working day is an older baby breastfed?

I’d assume their policies have changed in that time.

TBH allowing you to WFH till the end of the year seems eminently reasonsable of them. Yes some T &Cs change over time.

Colleague’s mat leave ended May 2023 so long after our company’s working practises had changed back to how they presently are post-covid. She only did her first physical shift in the office in July this year.

I’m not mad at her at all, I like her a lot.

agree with other posters that it’s at the companies discretion on what they allow/times have changed so although precedent has been set with one individual I don’t think that’s a legal/HR thing, it’s just that that colleague was lucky ie: the exception and not the rule. If your baby is 15months and you work nights I’m not sure you breastfeeding adds much weight to your argument either as you could still do a 7pm feed, then a morning feed so breastfeeding shouldn’t interfere in your working hours I’m guessing.

It sounds a bit like you just don’t want to go back into the office and are using breastfeeding as a reason. It can be done if you just get into a rhythm of expressing at work instead of when you would be feeding.

I should also point out mine is a mostly wfh hybrid role anyway. I’m only asking to stay at home one extra night a week.

Edited, misunderstood comment

I can't imagine working a night shift and breastfeeding in-between. I'd go to work for the break!!

But I do think they've been very reasonable to allow it until the end of the year tbh. I'm not sure I would - night feeds can take ages, plus nappy change, comforting to sleep etc.

Did your colleague also work nights? I'm not sure breastfeeding a 1yr+ old is a v strong argument for WFH if its not something your office particularly encourages to begin with. I'd imagine it must have been timing of your colleagues request in terms of post Covid practices that allowed it but how she managed to swing it until the child was 2 I don't know

So for childcare rather than BF?

She is in the same team, also nights, same
level of seniority, same role etc etc. only difference is I’ve taken 4 months less mat leave and I’m being allowed a year less of WFH.

No, it’s not a childcare issue at all.

I agree with PPs that many companies have really tightened up their WFH policies this year. Although individuals feel there's no difference to their ability to do their work day to day whether at home of in the office, businesses are taking a much wider view of what's best overall for the future of the company, succession planning etc.
What was agreed in 2023 is not going to cut it in 2025 in many companies.

I wonder too whether they regretted agreeing to it for your colleague once they saw how it was panning out.

They clearly realised you don’t need to work from home to breastfeed a 1 or 2 year old.

Yeah this. You can blame your colleague for taking the mick so much everyone else has a blanket no