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Original poster

Assaulted at work

44 replies

endangeredmum · 03/09/2024 19:51

Hello

Last weekend, I was assaulted twice by a guest at a wedding I was photographing.

The guest was a 7/8 year old autistic child who firstly hit me on the side of my head and secondly pulled my neck back by my ponytail whilst I was photographing on the dance floor. I nearly fell backwards and was emotionally traumatised and had to leave work immediately.

Both the bride and the boys mother saw everything happen and apologised immediately, the staff at the wedding also witnessed me sobbing in a corner after the assault. (I have just left an abusive relationship after 5 years and so this was particularly impactful)

I am self employed and have proof of the assault as the bride has messaged to ask if I am ok.

What are my rights here?

OP posts:
mraladdinsir · 03/09/2024 19:52

I am so sorry you had to endure this. A friend has been through something similar. She did report the assault to police.

Howmyhairlookman · 03/09/2024 19:54

I'm sorry this happened to you, but I don't think you have any recourse as such.

An autistic 8 year old isn't going to be arrested or visited by the police.

Were you physically injured?

Blueybanditbingochilli · 03/09/2024 19:55

I’m sorry you experienced this but (and I ask this nicely) what do you want from this thread? To know if you have a claim? To know if you can report to police?

comedycentral · 03/09/2024 19:57

I'm sorry this happened to you and if you were injured. What would you like to happen?

Realistically, nothing can happen to the child, they are under 10 and perhaps also unable to stop themselves from doing things like that. The parents should have intervened.

If you were injured, how badly? Do you have insurance? Or do you budget for time off sick? Are there any loss of earnings?

LaurieFairyCake · 03/09/2024 19:58

So sorry it happened to you Flowers

There's no recourse as of course he's under the age of criminal responsibility and parents can't control a child at all times

Landlubber2019 · 03/09/2024 20:01

I didn't want to read and run as I am very sorry this happened to you. I am glad that the family of the boy and the wedding party immediately sought to comfort and apologise to you. I think you have done brilliantly to escape a damaging relationship and you need to continue to work towards rebuilding yourself. Don't let this unexpected event, with a sen child derail you on your journey forward and consider what caused the event, was the child acting out of malice or where they overwhelmed/overstimulated.

DeCaray · 03/09/2024 20:12

When my children were small we were at children's party where parents stayed and a little girl was running amok and made a beeline for me as at the time I had very long hair. She launched herself at my hair and tried to swing from it and I had to physically manhandle her and basically throw her to the ground.

Her mother was completely unperturbed and shrugged and said the child is autistic.

I had a huge scratch on my neck and my head was sore from her assault.

It was horrible as the girl was only around four years old so I could hardly remonstrate with her and the mother just looked terribly sad and let the child carry on running amok.

We left as I didn't want my children hurt.

I really feel for you op as it's a horrible situation to be in but really you can't claim as you haven't been injured as such although it was a frightening incident at the time.

icelollycraving · 03/09/2024 20:18

What are you hoping for? What rights are you checking you have? As an employee/freelancer, or as a guest? Or legal advice?
Did you not take the photos required and that’s proving problematic?

SauviGone · 03/09/2024 20:21

I certainly would report this to the police even if nothing further happens with that.

Are you self employed? And if so what does your contract between you and your client say - is there anything in there about wedding insurance, guest behaviour or anything that covers this scenario?

Are you injured? What about your own insurance?

wheresthebigcarrot · 03/09/2024 20:25

I'd be interested to know what you're hoping for here?

LilyJessie · 03/09/2024 20:26

The child is not the age of criminal responsibility, therefore the police won't be involved at all, even if you reported it.
Possibly be referred to Social Services? But of interest, what would you want to happen in this instance?
The family apologised immediately and took responsibility.

I would advise (if you haven't already) to have some therapy for you, as it's awful to be triggered.

StarSlinger · 03/09/2024 21:13

You would report an autistic child to the police? really?

SilenceInside · 03/09/2024 21:16

This was a child, there's no criminal case to answer.

Do you want to try to sue the family for an unsafe workplace or something like that? Is that the sort of thing that you mean?

Laszlomydarling · 03/09/2024 21:22

What do you mean rights? School staff are subjected to this sort of thing daily. And worse.

What happened to you was horrible but it was a child with little/no understanding of the effects of their behaviour. You need to move on from this incident. They apologised, what more do you want?

And I don't say this lightly, as soon as you feel ready, try and get some counselling. I have PTSD from my abusive relationship and counselling has changed my life.

Original poster
endangeredmum · 03/09/2024 21:40

I had to leave the event immediately and want to know that I, myself, won’t be sued for leaving.

Of course I wouldn’t report an autistic child to the police! Good God.

I don’t know why I ever bother posting on here, the replies are always so nasty and damning. I could say I’ve been r***d and someone would reply ‘you need to get over yourself’

Utterly horrible.

Also, school staff know about SEN risks - I was not made aware!!!!! Wedding photographers aren’t usually prepped for assaults from anyone, autistic children included.

OP posts:
SilenceInside · 03/09/2024 21:42

Your OP implied that due to having proof of an assault that you were looking to take legal action. Not defend yourself from a possible breach of contract situation,

Did they pay you? Did you take any useable photos, enough to be sufficient to meet your contract obligations?

stichguru · 03/09/2024 21:43

Report to the police - just for them to have a laugh. Oh and if you ever have kids have two eyes on them and them within your reach 100% of the time until they 100% always understand what causes pain to others. This will be for at least 3 years probably more like 6, and if you happen to have one with autism or a similar disability maybe until their dying day - good luck.

queenmeadhbh · 03/09/2024 21:52

endangeredmum · 03/09/2024 21:40

I had to leave the event immediately and want to know that I, myself, won’t be sued for leaving.

Of course I wouldn’t report an autistic child to the police! Good God.

I don’t know why I ever bother posting on here, the replies are always so nasty and damning. I could say I’ve been r***d and someone would reply ‘you need to get over yourself’

Utterly horrible.

Also, school staff know about SEN risks - I was not made aware!!!!! Wedding photographers aren’t usually prepped for assaults from anyone, autistic children included.

Edited

Why did you ask “what are my rights” rather than “can I be sued for breach of contract”? That’s why it sounded like you wanted to report / press charges / make a claim.

Laszlomydarling · 03/09/2024 21:53

endangeredmum · 03/09/2024 21:40

I had to leave the event immediately and want to know that I, myself, won’t be sued for leaving.

Of course I wouldn’t report an autistic child to the police! Good God.

I don’t know why I ever bother posting on here, the replies are always so nasty and damning. I could say I’ve been r***d and someone would reply ‘you need to get over yourself’

Utterly horrible.

Also, school staff know about SEN risks - I was not made aware!!!!! Wedding photographers aren’t usually prepped for assaults from anyone, autistic children included.

Edited

School staff may be aware of the risks, but no one is ever prepped for assaults.

Anything can happen to anyone, anywhere, at any time. It's awful and traumatic. But it did sound from your OP like you wanted some sort of compensation or justice for the incident.

In terms of leaving early, surely you can just give them the photos you have, and they'll understand there won't be as many as they hoped due to the incident with the child. They witnessed it, so they won't be trying to sue.

You could go to the venue and ask if they have cctv or anyone can write a little statement about what they saw. This would help in the unlikely event they try to sue.

Sassybooklover · 03/09/2024 21:58

To be honest, I'm not entirely sure what you want to happen? The age of criminal responsibility is 10. Even if it was reported to the police, they wouldn't take any action. Unfortunately, as horrible as it is, you will have to accept that there is no recourse. You received an apology from the bride, and the child's parents. Is it ideal, no, but realistically, there is very little else that can happen. The smallest of things can trigger an autistic child and some will hit out if overwhelmed or overstimulated. I think you are upset that this incident has triggered you psychologically, and that's frightened you. I would suggest some counselling, to help you deal with your emotions and also coping strategies. In an ideal world, these instances shouldn't happen, but sadly they do. If I was the child's parents, I'd be mortified that my child hurt someone.

Afieldofroses · 03/09/2024 21:58

Your OP did imply that you were looking reassurance regarding reporting to police.

Sorry you felt this way but it's a difficult one, they did apologise and there really is no case to answer.

In order to protect yourself and your income as self employed perhaps you should write it into your contract that if you are unable to fulfil the entire contract due to guest behaviour then the total fee would have to be paid. That's probably not how you would articulate it but if it is your income you are looking to protect here, I would go along those lines.

KendraTheVampyrSlayer · 03/09/2024 21:58

SauviGone · 03/09/2024 20:21

I certainly would report this to the police even if nothing further happens with that.

Are you self employed? And if so what does your contract between you and your client say - is there anything in there about wedding insurance, guest behaviour or anything that covers this scenario?

Are you injured? What about your own insurance?

You'd report an 8 year old to the police? What?

KendraTheVampyrSlayer · 03/09/2024 22:02

endangeredmum · 03/09/2024 21:40

I had to leave the event immediately and want to know that I, myself, won’t be sued for leaving.

Of course I wouldn’t report an autistic child to the police! Good God.

I don’t know why I ever bother posting on here, the replies are always so nasty and damning. I could say I’ve been r***d and someone would reply ‘you need to get over yourself’

Utterly horrible.

Also, school staff know about SEN risks - I was not made aware!!!!! Wedding photographers aren’t usually prepped for assaults from anyone, autistic children included.

Edited

OP no one has been horrible, every single poster has said they're sorry you were assaulted. And most have suggested counselling.

comedycentral · 03/09/2024 22:03

endangeredmum · 03/09/2024 21:40

I had to leave the event immediately and want to know that I, myself, won’t be sued for leaving.

Of course I wouldn’t report an autistic child to the police! Good God.

I don’t know why I ever bother posting on here, the replies are always so nasty and damning. I could say I’ve been r***d and someone would reply ‘you need to get over yourself’

Utterly horrible.

Also, school staff know about SEN risks - I was not made aware!!!!! Wedding photographers aren’t usually prepped for assaults from anyone, autistic children included.

Edited

To be fair OP you were very unclear in your post, how are people supposed to respond? I think most responses have been really supportive. It's still unclear what you want from the post to be honest.

I'd say regarding your case with the client, what does it say in your agreement, are you insured?

Choochoo21 · 03/09/2024 22:11

I’m so sorry this happened to you.
It really shakes you up being attacked, even by a child.

I worked with SN children for a while and the first time I was attacked I was crying and shaking, even though I am not a crier and I’ve dealt with much worse in my time.

I’m not sure if you have any ‘rights’ as such as you are SE.

If the child was older I would suggest reporting to the police but there would be no point in this situation.

Where you paid the full amount?