Struggling mentally wfh

[birtybotts]

I've wfh for 5 years. Enjoy the job, benefits and pay are good but it's making me hate my house and my mental health isn't great as probably speak to my team members for 30 mins a week and work longer days. Local office now closed due to cost saving by company and no option to office share as it's confidential and they won't pay anyway.
What do people do to make it more bearable? DH and DD just want to stay in house when they get home from work/school and then I feel guilty dragging them out on eve and weekend.
I sometimes go for a walk at lunch but most of the time it's raining!

I had this setup for a few years. I had a good honest conversation with my other half about how being in the house all week was affecting me and we then ensured we had plans at the weekend every weekend.

I have also trialled working at someone else's house (with them) so sharing their office space and working from a local weatherspoons too so that I saw more people and had a bit of variety in the week. Always turning on my camera for meetings also helped. It turned out I just felt lonely and isolated and need more interaction with people.

Do you have a dog? Daily walks (with company even if it's only the four legged one) really helps.

I hate wfh for many reasons but one of them being I struggled so much with loneliness and isolation for a very long time. It’s truly a horrible feeling ❤️

In the end I felt my only option was to get a new job with a local office that people actually go into every week. I have ended up having to change career and start my new job in October - sad to leave my current career but looking forward to the new opportunity!

I hate it on LinkedIn when people drone on about how marvellous WFH is because no commuting, quiet workplace blah blah blah, without any acknowledgment that some of us are different and need physical human interactions occasionally to stay sane.

I'm in a mostly WFH position but fortunately have an office to go into.

Can you set up meetings with friends one or two evenings a week or even something like a regular exercise class. It's such a shame if the job is otherwise ok.

I WFH 4 days a week and go out for an evening walk on two of those days. It's nice having a stroll around at 8pm when it's more peaceful.

Thanks all for replying.
Im glad to know it's not just me.
I've going to a gym in my lunch break today to have a tour so even if I could just go there for half hour on my lunch break that would help. I feel so alone and it's horrid.
We do have a dog but he's reactive so walking him is stressful and DH does it with DD.
Im planning to try an art class but I feel I'm out of touch talking to people other than at sodding toddler groups for the last four year which wasn't very enjoyable or able to get a full sentence in, so sometimes I feel a bit socially anxious now if that makes sense. I never used to be like this.
I do enjoy the job and my manager is v flexible which is great for DD. Plus we get a good bonus every so often. So I feel it's my metal health cocking this up tbh

I had this problem. I joined a choir so I could go do something socially every week. DH was in a job where he was talking to people all day so was quiet when he got home, and all I wanted was someone to talk to! I also make sure I see friends a lot and do a lot of walking/running. It sounds like you need some things to do that are just for you OP if your DH and DD don't want to go out at the weekend.

It's not your mental health cocking this up @birtybotts .

I strongly feel that human beings are meant to be together and doing it on screen doesn't really cut it for me - at least not all of the time.

There is a lot of information on how WFH is great if you're ND and gives the space needed to focus, but for me I actually work so much better bouncing stuff off other people and seeing my team face to face.

No one way is right or wrong and it's as valid to want to work with people together as it is to want to wfh.

Is there any flex in your budget for using a co-working space? Some near me you can drop in for a few hours or have a membership which means you can go any time, and a few people I know do this so they're not at home working with their partner also WFH all the time. There's also a pub near me which actively encourages people with laptops and work in the day time :)

No it isn’t your fault! If it doesn’t work for you then it doesn’t work for you, you can’t help that.

Imho sitting at a screen on your own at home all day everyday is not a healthy way to live and it should not be the norm.

Minimum £250 here and wouldn't work with taking two screens and school runs unfortunately. We did look into it.
I even thought about working from my grandmas one day a week but she would drive m even crazier probably.

@Pippifer
Thanks for saying this. I've been increasingly worried the last few years it was my slowly amounting anxiety causing this

Can you share with your manager that you're struggling with the isolation from the team. 30 mins a week interaction with the team sounds awful. How can the manager possibly know how everyone is and who's coping and who isn't?

Could they set up a daily Teams catch up? Team coffee breaks? Just because there no office now doesn't mean you can't still be part of a team and interact daily. It's poor of your manager to have allowed such isolation and lack of support.

Do you have any friends or neighbours who also wfh who you could meet for lunch or go for a walk with at lunchtime?

I had a manager who hated WFH so much. He whinged about it and his MH so much in every Teams call that our Director made everyone return to the office.

He was so self obsessed he paid no attention to what everyone else needed. Then, having achieved what he wanted he left 🙄

Fortunately the company has since gone hybrid.

Im the same OP. Been WFH full time since the pandemic. I'm also a single parent so can't go out in the evenings either.