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What would you do?

5 replies

mommyandmore · 08/08/2024 17:41

Hello! Looking for some advice please.

I am a teacher in a highly regarded city prep school. I like my job and my school is a lovely place to be most of the time which I am so thankful for!

Going back to work after my little one was born was very difficult. My school do not offer PT teaching positions so it was full time or be on my merry way. I went back 2 years ago and it has been a huge juggle for us as a family. I feel like my LO has missed lots of time with me and the Mom guilt has always been there.

The reason for going back to work was because as a family we knew we wanted to move in the future so needed my salary for our mortgage. We put an offer on our dream home - a 45 minute drive from the city which was accepted 1.5 years ago! However, due to various issues it has taken a long time to go through. We now have updates that the house will finally complete in a few weeks time - hooray!

Whilst delighted, I am now so unsure about what to do regarding my teaching job. I can legally hand in my notice in September (a terms notice so leave at Christmas) but it would be extremely frowned upon and I hate the thought of doing that to my new class/parents - especially as they pay an awful lot to send their children to our school. I've also got on so well at this school it would make me so sad to leave on such terms like feeling I'm letting the team down etc.

I could commute but 45 mins each way seems unfair for my LO as his nursery is near my work. Moving his nursery is an option but I do like that he is close to me at school incase I'm needed.

I could also suck it up and hand in my notice and then spend the last year my LO has before starting school with him which would be incredible.

I guess my question to you is what would you do in my position? Has anyone been in a similar position? Any advice or words of wisdom to help me navigate this would be amazing.

Thanks so much in advance 🫶

OP posts:
Pr1mr0se · 09/08/2024 00:58

45 minutes to work is not an excessive commute by car when the nursery is close to your work and seems an ideal location to me and also retains your standard of living when you've just moved and may have additional costs due to that house purchase. Surely you'd still need your salary for the mortgage?

If it's really about spending time with your son whilst he is not at school and you can afford it then go for it. Giving in your notice now would still mean you'd have nine months before he goes to school.

Sorry, not sure any of that will be helpful really as only you can decide.

mommyandmore · 09/08/2024 23:00

Pr1mr0se · 09/08/2024 00:58

45 minutes to work is not an excessive commute by car when the nursery is close to your work and seems an ideal location to me and also retains your standard of living when you've just moved and may have additional costs due to that house purchase. Surely you'd still need your salary for the mortgage?

If it's really about spending time with your son whilst he is not at school and you can afford it then go for it. Giving in your notice now would still mean you'd have nine months before he goes to school.

Sorry, not sure any of that will be helpful really as only you can decide.

Edited

Thanks so much for the reply! Okay you have reassured me that 45 mins is doable! Even if we keep LO in his pjs for the journey and nursery can change him. Thank you!

OP posts:
mytuppennyworth · 09/08/2024 23:03

You are too fixated on being "frowned upon". Firstly, you probably won't be, and secondly how unprofessional, and so very mush not your problem if you are

Toomuchgoingon79 · 10/08/2024 08:39

45 minute isn't a long commute. That's normal for where I love. My sons commute to nursery was 40 minutes for 4 years. It's doable easily

mondaytosunday · 10/08/2024 08:57

45 minutes is fine - it was about that when I had mine in daycare (actually about 30 minutes to get him there then another 25 to get to work - geographically close but not with the traffic and parking etc).
I'd do the whole school year.

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