Any tips for dealing with this sort of difficult behaviour in work?

[bottlenose]

I've recently been appointed as manager of a team and am having problems with the behaviour of one of the team members who applied for the job himself.

He's very bright and skilled at what he does and has a lot of strengths - which I've praised him publicly and privately for.

But - and I've also told him this privately - he also sometimes demonstrates challenging behaviour which has stood in the way of his promotion (not just in this job, but elsewhere).

For example, he volunteered for a high-profile project and I supported him in this, in the face of competition from others and some cynicism from my own boss who felt that Mr X's reputation might hinder it.

Now he is objecting, in the office and in front of others, to carrying out some aspects of the project, which he knew about in advance and in writing at the time of agreeing he would carry out the project.

I spoke to Mr X today (privately) and said I found his behaviour puzzling and difficult as he had volunteered for the work.

He then gave me a list of objections, mostly not relating to this project, but to do with gripes he had with the way he felt he had been treated before my arrival in the department.

I can't help feeling that it's passive-aggressive behaviour and quite likely related to my being brought in to the job rather than him. (He was missing a very vital qualification for the post which I have and lacks the management experience I have, plus, I know that his reputation would have prevented him even if he had been qualified).

I was quite robust in my responses to his gripes..told him he should have raised them earlier...and I will look at addressing one specific issue he raised which I might be able to do something about. The previous complaints are in the past and not in my control anyway.

Any thoughts on how else to handle this? I suspect it's not going to go away, and I need to ensure successful delivery of the project. TIA

bottlenose it actually sounds like you are handling it very well already.

Although you are already pointing out in a constructive manner how his behaviour isn't helping him, addressing his concerns, and managing the situation well, sometimes with someone like this, it needs to come from someone else. No reflection on you, but if his ears are shut to what you are saying, possibly because he is resentful of your promotion, the same being pointed out to him by a 'neutral' (the inverted commas are deliberate) individual might have more impact.

When I was working full time in organisations this informal mentoring-type role was something I did quite frequently, sometimes it involved asking to see the person about something quite minor, developing a general conversation, establishing a relationship, and helping the person realise how their behaviour is hindering them and coaching them to adjust it.

Obviously whether something similar is possible where you are will depend on the culture and who might be available or capable of doing it- it's a delicate business but can be very effective. Do you think something like that might be a possibility where you are?

If not, you are doing really well I'd say. More of the same, maybe also take him out to lunch and try and develop your relationship a bit so he might listen to you more, and I'd say be really really honest about the problems he is demonstrating and how they are affecting people's perception of him at work, and if you feel the mood is right, offer guidance and suggestions about addressing the problems.

We probably work in completely different settings but I had a colleague who displayed some similar behaviour to that of your colleague.

In my case my colleague (let's call him A for ease of typing) was quite good at some parts of his job. However he could also be quite moody and unreliable, that was the way his personality was.

Some people found it almost impossible to know how to handle him. Many of us felt that actually why should we have to "handle" his bad behaviours at all? In order to maintain a harmonious working relationship a certain amount of "pandering" had to be done. However the reality was that we did have to get along, unless his behaviour meant that he ended up getting the sack...

"A" really seemed to enjoy all the drama, and was aware that he was causing ripples shall we say. I always found that whatever the provocation from him, the only way was to always be completely professional and calm. As Flowery says it sounds like you are already dealing with this very well.

I think that A and I finally reached an understanding when one day he went Too Far. We had a minor professional disagreement and I urgently needed to talk to him about a client. He literally put his hood up and left the building with his head down like a young teenager might behave. I almost ran after him in temper, but quickly came to my senses.

The next day we had a very "firm" discussion and I insisted on an apology. Since then he tends to behave more appropriately round me. However I am often called on by other colleagues/students when he gets up to his old tricks. He just likes to be the centre of attention on some days, and is one of those people who often feels he is being hard done by!.

Thanks for your support.

Mr X has been very well behaved today...I hope the conversation we had yesterday had that effect...it may be he was testing me to see how far he could push.

Flowery - I think you're right, and I'll have a think about who the 'neutral' person could be...the difficulty is that Mr X is a bit of a maverick and extremely anti-management and 'victimised' (as he sees it)...it would need to be someone he respects and I'm not sure who that might be.

But I am crossing everything and hoping there won't be a problem in future.

Lollipop...I understand what you're saying..I've known others like Mr A and sometimes being very firm is what needs to be done...I was quite firm yesterday, while at the same time trying to address his concerns, even though I felt they hadn't been raised in a constructive way.