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Making notes on my boss’ behaviour

5 replies

NickD87 · 27/06/2024 21:59

I am a head of department at a charity and I’ll preface this by saying on a personal level I adore(d) my boss, the CEO. We consider each other friends - on the whole. However, this has created something of a toxic professional relationship.

It shouldn’t really matter, but she is 64 and I am 35. She has no kids. I largely work from home, so we see each other face to face once every couple of weeks.

In December, I came back from maternity and for a while she was really pushy with me from a professional perspective. Unrealistic targets, short time frames. I started to lose the ‘rose tinted glasses’ and I noticed her behaviour with other members of the team actually became bullying. She would blow hot and cold with me - but she knows with our ‘friendly/toxic’ dynamic that if she tried any bullying tactics on me then I’d pull her up on it immediately.

I began to make notes about how I was being treated and more so how others were being treated.

That lasted two months before I got over it and just got on with it.

Recently her behaviour has become frantic again. And I have noticed comments that are racist, homophobic, transphobic….and it’s totally new. I am taken aback. Shocked. Examples all from the last month.

We work with celebrities quite often and she asked me if one has ‘big lips’ following a recent meeting.

On a potential relationship with a well known drag performer, she questioned whether they might be ‘into kids’

on a new member of the team joining, who is Indian, she waxed lyrical about her potential - but just hoped she didn’t ’smell of curry’

I wanted to interview a candidate with an African name and they were veto’d - despite being the most qualified by a MILE and was unable to give a proper reason apart from ‘fit’ (without meeting them)

She has also become jealous of my friendships with other coworkers.

From chatting to another head of department I historically didn’t get on with, we discovered she had been telling each of us different things - untruths in fact - and playing us against one another. We now get on well…which she doesn’t seem to like.

Today she said that I need to stop hugging a greeting to another colleague (a woman similar to her age - who I get on really well with - not in my team or a team I have any dealings with). She is just a very friendly, tactile person.

This came on top of a list of complaints about a project today - where each complaint really needn’t have been one. It was nit picking, and she clearly had a bee in her bonnet about something. A cold day.

my question is….Im returning to making those notes, now including the inappropriate comments.

We don’t have an internal HR dept. It would involve going to the Trustee’s.

With childcare, the job offers me so much flexibility. I can work my hours around baby, so no need to pay for nursery at the moment….i can’t imagine finding something else that fits my situation currently. But I feel like this can go really badly if she isn’t held to account.

OP posts:
Squiggles23 · 28/06/2024 09:25

I don’t think the ‘big lips’ comment is that bad - she’s just asking if she’s one of those who have had ridiculous lip implants presumably. However, the two racist comments are clearly very bad.

Have you tried to speak to her about all this? I think that would be the first step.

NickD87 · 28/06/2024 11:52

Squiggles23 · 28/06/2024 09:25

I don’t think the ‘big lips’ comment is that bad - she’s just asking if she’s one of those who have had ridiculous lip implants presumably. However, the two racist comments are clearly very bad.

Have you tried to speak to her about all this? I think that would be the first step.

Oh I should have mentioned it was a black male. And not the type for lip filler.

OP posts:
Arlanymor · 28/06/2024 12:03

Ugh that sounds awful poor you. Is your charity a member of something like the NCVO? https://www.ncvo.org.uk/about-us/our-services/support-small-charities-voluntary-organisations/

I would seek an external chat with an organisation geared to support charities without their own HR function - it doesn't need to be formal, you can just set out the basics and they can help signpost you to someone who helps. It might ultimately be a conversation with your trustees, but if you can get things straight in your mind first about what you want to happen with the evidence you provide and how this is impacting on you/your work/the work of the organisation, then you'll be in a better place to take things forward formally if this is where it goes.

I'm in Wales and we are part of WCVA which would be my first port of call for advice if I needed some good, impartial advice about this type of thing.

Xsnsnshsjs · 28/06/2024 12:19

Ah man. She sounds awful.

Real world advice here 🙋🏼‍♀️

It sounds like the role is otherwise pretty cushy in terms of balance with childcare and so on. It will be hard to find something else but maybe start trying as a side project. Only leave if you can find something that you feel gives the same perks, don’t leave for something worse as you’ll be bitter.

With no HR department I think you’re stuffed in terms of being able to get her to change her behaviour. With going to the trustees… I have a mate who was in a very similar situation (small business, had to go to the board to complain about the CEO) and they were totally screwed over as a result. You don’t go after Caesar unless you are certain to win, and I’m not sure you would.

For your own sanity, I’d call out the racist comments. Maybe innocently asking her to explain them, ‘what do you mean by big lips?’ Etc. The petty comments etc I’d try and ignore if you can. Surely she’ll retire soon enough?

good luck x

Squiggles23 · 28/06/2024 17:55

That’s an awful comment now you’ve given context!!

I vote for calling out the racism every time again and again.

Next time I would say - that’s not an acceptable thing to say, I appreciate you probably don’t meant to come across racist but that’s how it seems. I don’t want to hear things like this so I would appreciate if you wouldn’t make comments like that in the workplace.

If it continues follow up in writing by email, ‘Hi boss, this is a difficult conversation to have. As mentioned in person I’ve felt uncomfortable around some of your comments. For example X and X there have been other instances too. I know you probably don’t mean to but they can come across racist. It makes others uncomfortable and I would really appreciate if you wouldn’t say things like that around me. I enjoy working with you otherwise so hope we can move on from this.’

Then next step would be to go to trustees?

Ideally you need others to witness the comments too and be willing to back you up if you do that.

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