Have I got this wrong?

[Emma84882]

Hello Mumsnetters,

Would be very grateful for your advice. Have been in my job just short of 4 years. In that time, have changed managers four times. The company is nice overall and the money is decent. The latest manager has been awful. She is never happy with anything I do, micromanages and belittles me. I’ve really hit rockbottom with it all. I’m getting through it by just biting my tongue as I don’t think she’s the sort of person it would be easy for me to stand up to.

I’ve been looking at other jobs, and after almost three months, have today been offered what seems like the perfect job. It’s slightly higher basic salary, but I will be remote so won’t be entitled to a car benefit like I was before. It’s far fewer hours with an extra day off - I really think it could be the right thing, but I feel that my judgement is so off at the moment due to how I am feeling about it all.

I guess my question is, how do you know if you have found the right new job? It’s so hard to know and I’m not a quitter but I feel like my mental health has taken a nose dive.

Thanks for any advice

Well it sounds a hell of a lot better than your current job. I'd go for it, give it a while to settle and get used to it, and then if you don't like it apply for something else from there.

Well, you know your current job is making you feel crap and a new job is the only way to get away from that, so what have you got to lose? You may have lost confidence in your judgement, but you know you're not happy currently, so all you can do is change your situation and hope for the best. Good luck!

people don't leave jobs, they leave managers. totally reasonable to change.

More money for working 1 less day than you do now and no shitty boss. Whats not to like?

Is there any room for negotiation with the new salary so they can match your current basic + car allowance?

I took a pay cut to get out of a toxic place and while it was the right move, the cut still rankles and I regularly kick myself.

Hello, any job is better than one with a manager that micromanages and belittles to the point where it breaks you down mentally.

Have you heard of the phrase “people don’t leave jobs, they leave managers.”

how do you know if you have found the right job? Well you don’t until you try it. At this point OP any job is better than what you have.
Give yourself 3 - 6 months on the job to assess this one suits you, if not, start looking.

I wish you all the very best.

Hi all,

Thank you so much for your kind words and useful advice. Really appreciated. It has given me confidence to just get on and change really. No movement on the new job offer, however friend suggested checking what losing a company car would do to my tax code and I will be about £250 better off each month, so I guess that softens the blow of losing the car a bit! And trying to focus on the extra day. Nothing to lose I guess because as some of you have said, I don’t like where I am now and if I don’t like the new place, I guess I will look again. I hate toxic bosses though - just not sure what they get from being like that!

Oh if it's a company car instead of car allowance you'll be better off without it. Take the job!