Couldn't keep emotions in check today at work

[AsparagusGirl]

So annoyed with myself. Have been in workshops this week with colleagues from other countries, one of whom I have had a couple of recent disagreements with.
I found he didn't really want to talk to me much, even socially, when I tried in person even though we used to get on. In one of the workshops I discussed something about a team in his country and he didn't agree with what I said but rather than say anything in the meeting he sent me a load of IMs (still in the same meeting) telling me why I was wrong and I shared the evidence that I thought supported my point (also via IM) but we didn't agree. I felt quite sad at his manner towards me and found myself struggling not to cry in the meeting (I had sneezed a couple of times with hayfever so tried to act like I had itchy hayfevery eyes) then I also felt like I couldn't speak to him to "make up" without getting emotional. I did try to go and say bye to a group of them but he just didn't meet my eye and despite hugs and handshakes from most of the others he just left and didn't really say bye.
I then spoke to a UK colleague who had been in the workshops about it and ended up crying- I could still talk but just with tears running down my face.
Why am I like this!?! How can I not let emotions at work turn to tears? I don't think I have cried at work for nearly a decade but just really got to me today. I am 37 and imagine I will probably get my period tomorrow but still!!!!

Do you normally care so much about what an acquaintance thinks? Why did you feel it was necessary to respond to his IM's, which was very immature of him, BTW.

Although on the other hand, it would have been difficult had he decided to announce to the entire room that he thought the OP was wrong. Possibly better for the OP to be upset when talking privately to one colleague rather than being embarrassed or reduced to tears in front of everybody.

I am quite sensitive and the impression I got was that he thought I was being unfair (and wrong)
I guess I responded because I wanted to share the evidence that I believed I was correct in what I was saying so he would understand, but probably the best thing would just to have ignored the messages and acted like I wasn't reading my messages at that point! Live and learn!

The point of the meetings was healthy debate about various topic and I would have welcomed the healthy debate in person and shared the more detailed evidence. I had already been challenged on the point and discussed it a bit more, and had he brought up his thoughts at the time I would have shared the more detailed evidence I shared via IM in person. It just kind of knocked me the way he spoke in the IMs (seemed quite aggressive and attacking me for trying to make a point when I "wasn't close to the detail" and "shouldn't be commenting on something I don't know enough about") especially as we used to get on fairly well.