Frustrated colleagues

[JougDudy]

Like any workplace, where I work has its fair share of disagreements but recently it feels like a daily occurance and it’s really starting to wear me down, particularly with one individual who I manage.

Things are quite tough at the moment with some new colleagues rubbing people up the wrong way but I feel like a verbal punching bag at the moment - is this just part of being a line manager, or can I stand up for myself a bit more?

id never dream of demanding things from my manager or being openly rude but maybe that’s just my background. Is this normal?

I relate a lot, in my line of work I am often the sounding board for many direct reports and colleagues due to my role in the organisation. There is strong emotional investment in my organisation (half the workforce are volunteers) and the org is going through complex change at all levels, so frustration and anxiety is coming in from all directions.

It's hard but try to remember it's their conflict and not yours. Don't take it on your shoulders. You can facilitate conversations perhaps, or advise... but the moment you take their conflict on as your own mentally, it's game over.

Try to word your responses in a way that prompts them to create their own solutions or ways forward. I did a course in conflict resolution and it was a revelation for me as a manager. Asking simple questions such as "how do YOU see a way forward" or "what does resolution look to YOU" puts the ball in their court and the nature of the human brain will only rant and rave for so long before it naturally looks for solutions.

Good luck

Also, when there's a negative culture in an office space or organisation, there's usually a "race to the bottom" vibe where people tend to compete with each other on how displeased they are with things. There's no shame in keeping a positive mindset as a line manager, whilst still being sympathetic to their grievances.

No one is holding a gun to their head to work there!

You mean they are being demanding and/or rude to you, their boss?

Well you need to stamp that out pretty sharpish. If you are finding things difficult, then ask for advice on how to handle the situation from HR or your own manager.

hope I’m getting the reply function right! Their emails feel like they’re crossing a line to be honest. I get that they’re frustrated but they’re issuing instructions and constantly criticising the way things are handled

This is so true. Thank you. It does feel like a race to the bottom sometimes

Are the staff demanding things younger than you? I’ve noticed younger colleagues have really high expectations from managers.

You say things are difficult, is there then a legitimacy to how they feel?

Needed to read this thread tonight, in a similar position and feeling the lonely-limbo of middle management. Charity role, and lots of discontent in team at the moment for various reasons - some very valid reasons to fair, but beyond my control (ie end of project funding). Finding it exhausting, and frustrating that colleagues aren't prepared to work on solutions (or accept what's out of their/my control).