What job do you do in school hours?

[user1478639495]

I've got 3 kids, 2 at school one baby currently on mat leave. The job I had and nursery I had have both gone tits up so now I'm not able to get any decent childcare until next year. I'm getting a lot of pressure from the other half to find work. So my questions is, anyone that manages to work in school hours or even do remote jobs (ideally I need this so I can look after my baby!) what do you do?

I've tried looking at online jobs bits it's all the same commission jobs selling jobs all of which I am
No good at nor interested in.

Thoughts advice welcome thanks

I work for a parish council too, not a Clerk, but another admin role. 16 hours a week, not from home though.

Why is he pushing you to work? Quite difficult to find anything in those hours.

Second being a childminder. I did that for 4 years, 20 years ago and loved it.

This is entirely my point. Don’t find a job to fit your current childcare requirements.
Find a job and THEN find the childcare (with the help of your other half) to ensure you can do the job!

Going by the shortage of childcare places she would have to look for evening, weekend work. I suspect the OP's DH might be less keen for her to work after a few months of that.

You can't work when looking after a baby.

You cannot WFH and look after a baby unless you are going to do one of those pin money "earn £10 a day" style jobs. Almost every company now has it in their contracts that you MUST have childcare during working hours.

Evening, nights and weekend work are your most plausible options here if you do not want to pay childcare and need something more than £10-20 here and there. Cafes and bars are always wanting weekend staff near us, bnbs, hotels and Travelodge are always hiring for housekeeping or night shift reception staff, there are a few cleaning companies round us who always want weekend staff. Supermarkets usually have night shift shelf stacking jobs come up. Are there any factories around you that have a night shift? Takeaways are always looking for evening drivers.

So your options are: pin money gig economy jobs, putting the baby and children in childcare, working evenings/ nights/ weekends.

You can't work and look after a baby.

I am a secondary school teacher. When I need to, I can work 8.15-3.15 but this requires me being very organised and usually staying late the day before to get set up and coming in extra early the following day. More typically, I do 7.30 - 4.30, a couple of evenings (not every night) and Sunday afternoon. If there are meetings, parents' evenings or extra tuition on after school (usually 2-3 times per week), then I wouldn't be able to miss those.

Yeah sorry you saying you wanted to wfh while looking after your baby is insane!

How old is your baby? Why is your partner putting all of this on you?

I freelance as a web content writer, self-publish on a niche topic through Amazon, do some research in the same niche for other people.

Not sure on your qualifications but could you do an evening childcare level 2 course? Day nurseries around us are crying out for staff (especially with the new 2yr funding coming in). Some are willing to take on apprentices who are studying. Often day nursery staff get a reduction on fees for their child and the bigger chains usually have a wrap around provision including holiday provisions for primary school age children.

And yeah - working and looking after a baby isn't going to work. You either need the flexibility of being fully self-employed, which then means never having a regular income and having to respond to client demands and fluctuations in work, or getting a fully employed position which means paying for childcare.

If there is no childcare available, could your partner work condensed hours, or part time, or flexible, or from home or a mix. Then you can work the days he isnt or you can both juggle the baby whilst working flexibly from home - like he could start late, whilst you work, then you take over.

Either that or its evenings/weekends for one of you as there arent many term time only jobs that let you look after a baby whilst doing them.

I do admin in a school. Its a nice job.

This exactly what he thinks. If I don't go to work I'll be sat down all day drinking tea and watching tv. I'm shocked that this is his attitude I've never seen this side as I've always worked, I went back after 9 months with my first 2 but this time I wanted the year as it's our last which was fine.

I was hoping to go back to my previous job of admin within a surgery but to put it very basic terms they are screwing me over and I want to try and better myself. With the childcare aspect the nursery I'd planned to go to have shut down and the others aren't excepting until this time next year, I've looked at child minders but I'm not comfortable with the ones I've seen. I'm quite a fussy mum I won't just leave my kids anywhere I have to be 110% happy as they are my world! His attitude is find a space and stick them in there-his words. I'm not happy to do that unless I'm happy with it.

I said if it's that important I go back in a rush then you can take a day or two off to look after our baby or do a weeknd day and I'll do one etc but it was radio silence so it's me stressing and having the pressure to sort a place for baby and find a half decent job.

The thing that makes no sense at the end of the day, we will be financially better off if I don't go back to work until next year as the jobs I'm getting or my previous job, I would come out with about £2 change once I've covered the childcare fees. It makes no sense to me. But he seems to have zero respect for mums that stay home to look after their family it seems that's lazy he doesn't appreciate that it does not stop, it is a job in its own right.

I'm so angry with him as he's really tarnished this last month or two with this shit I really wanted to enjoy every second with baby and lap it up until work. Now I'm constantly stressing about work child care etc. i think I'm coming to the point where I'll have to just accept the zero respect that I'll get once I declare that actually this is not fair, we both make a child not just a mum, it's on both of us and if it isn't then this won't work. I'm happy to work never said I'm not just not under these circumstances. Why is it so bad I take time out with our baby to care for them myself and try and better myself work wise, I don't know try and do a course in the evenings to enable a better job for myself for our family.

I'm so sorry for the rant I'm just exhausted with it all and don't know where to turn.

Thank you all so much for your response it's really helpful hearing what jobs you do around childcare. I don't for a second think it's fair on job or baby if I work form home while babies up and about, I agree that's not on I was more thinking when they are asleep at night and the other 2 if I can do some online work so I'm here but like you say it's all the stuff that's not enough to earn a wage or commissions based stuff.

I don't know what the answer is I'm going around in circles! I'll stop ranting now-thanks for reading and leaving advice everyone much appreciated 👍🏻

I used to work in support at a sixth form college and now I'm a youth mentor. Full time hours are 9-3.30 but you can choose your shifts. I love it because there's shifts available in the holidays too for a bit of extra cash

I'm quite a fussy mum I won't just leave my kids anywhere I have to be 110% happy as they are my world

........whereas all of the rest of us are happy to leave our dc anywhere as they aren't our world, presumably ?

Not sure why that would hit a nerve with you I was referring to my other half with the comment he made no body else, why would I? I'd assume most parents would feel/do the same as myself the issue stands with my other half not you nor anyone else, not sure why'd you make that personal I don't know you nor anyone else on here 🤷‍♀️

With his attitude i would be very tempted to get a weekend job.

I’m a bookkeeper (ICB) and have a job at a commercial harbour dealing with the accounts, invoicing etc etc. I work 0930-1430 4 days a week. This was a career change for me after having children and studying bookkeeping distance learning.

If childcare wipes your salary - then get a weekend job. 14 x £10 is £140 x 4 clear each month. So you’d be better off.

You could do a cost analysis pay out goings etc And show him.

Cost up the other two in holiday clubs and compare that and nursery to your incoming salaries.

I'm happy for my team to work very flexibly/work short hours /work from home. But bar rare exceptions (nursery closure /ill child) I would not accept them trying to combine childcare and working from home

Self employed cleaner, I chose my own hours

The next day your 'D'H isn't working leave the house at 8am, return at 6pm, don't answer your phone and see how much of anything he gets done. Complain if the house isn't pristine and your dinner isn't hot on the table.

Then send him back to the 1950s where he belongs.

I worked as a Customer Assistant on Sundays and some evenings. We were better off that way as we didn't have to pay childcare. We haven't had to worry about childcare for many years, but I still work Sundays - DH says he actually enjoys having the day to himself and we certainly make the most of our Saturdays together.

I agree with others @user1478639495 find a weekend/evening job and leave everything for him to do childcare wise. He will then genuinely appreciate what you do otherwise his behaviour towards you will not improve. It's very unfair how your husband (please say you're married otherwise you and the kids are very vulnerable!) is treating you. Looking after kids full time is much harder (and much more important) than vast majority of jobs.

Also I agree with your sentiment of your children being your world and wanting to prioritse being the main person caring for them instead of a some random childcare worker. Some posters are sensitive about it because they know of course theyre not spending anywhere near the same amount of quality time with their kids as a stay at home parent so try to deflect their own guilt by criticising stay at home mothers.