Can you / did you do it all?

[febbabies2023]

I've just returned to work after having my second baby. I work full time and I've just gone into a new role within my company

For context the role is a trainee designer until I pass three technical assessments where I then become a junior. In order to become a full designer, I need to take 5 technical assessments and complete a 2 year college course.

For reference, it's in the electrical utility sector.

I get paid well, but obviously the quicker I progress, the quicker I get a pay rise. The jump between trainee and qualified is around 20k

My question is, have you done it or / are doing it all?
Working full time
Parenting
Studying

Is it doable and if you're doing it how did you best manage your time and your responsibilities?

Kids are 11 months and 3.5

I haven't really. I've worked for 16 years in my industry and have seen my friends overtake me with their salary increasing and mine staying the same! If you can do it and you think that it's worth it then why not go for it!

I went back to work when my youngest was only 8 weeks, this was only possible due to my husband being at home during the week and only working weekends, and my employer being very flexible.

I think whatever you do there will be sacrifices, you just need to have help or childcare in place and remember that you can't "do it all" although we all try to and feels like we are a lot of the time.

I have friends who have tried and I think you need a really good support network eg supportive partner, childcare, outsourcing work like cleaning etc.

Essentially it comes down to your specific circumstances, do you have a partner and wider family that can share the load? How do you define doing it all? Do you have responsibility for all the household chores, meals, shopping, cleaning, laundry as well as caring for your DCs plus work and study?

Yes you can but you need a fully supportive partner. An actually equally committed partner who is on the same team and practically supports your needs.

I'm currently working FT, studying a technical master's, and parenting 2 DC. My DC are now both primary age though, and I didn't go up from 0.8 to FT until youngest started reception. I find it manageable, but it works because DH is a full partner and because we can afford a cleaner and good wraparound childcare.

I did. I completed my LPC (law finals) a week after a c-section with my second child. Oldest was 3. I trained and worked my arse off as a single mum, barely affording to feed myself, only my kids.

Many years later I earn very well. I’m a director and I don’t regret it. It’s a lot of work but it can be done. Be warned though some women will treat you like shit for it (it’s only been women in my experience).

Thanks all!

Yes I have a supportive partner who does his fair share. His work is also very full on though
Both kids are currently in nursery 5 days a week with the eldest due to start school in September
We used to have a cleaner until I went on mat leave and finances are slightly tighter with two kids costing me nearly 3k a month for childcare.

Come September though when the eldest starts school, funds increase and I'll definitely be junior level by then and my partner likely to have a payrise so definitely doable to get a cleaner back

Is there anything else that made it easier for those of you who were trying to juggle a lot?

The sacrifice is worth it IMO. The kids are young enough not to remember so we can work really hard now so they benefit in 2/3 years time

Online shopping, meal plans and batch cooking, preparing for the next day the night before, saying no to things, accepting that sometimes ok is good enough and not seeking perfection in everything.