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How do you accept you wont ever have a career or achieve anything of value?

17 replies

Greetingavocados · 24/01/2024 19:35

I have a job.
It is ok but largely insignificant and poorly paid.
Due to my age and my lack of qualifications and situation it’s unlikely to change.

There are no opportunities for progression in my company and even if there were I’d not apply as I’d not get them…

Are there any lower paid (minimum wage) jobs that can lead to things that are slightly better paid? I am stuck at the moment.

OP posts:
Thinkbiglittleone · 24/01/2024 19:45

What do you mean by anything of value?
Do you mean monetary value as in salary or value as in something worth while?

Have you looked at some low cost or free courses to retrain, if you are on low wages would you qualify for funding towards a course you may like.

Greetingavocados · 24/01/2024 19:48

Value in any sense of the word really.
I am always going to struggle financially on minimum wage but my total lack of experience / qualifications / age makes it hard to find anything else.
And someone pointed out to me that transferable skills are worth nothing cos everyone has them plus other stuff usually or they are young and have a lot of qualifications.

OP posts:
Hatty65 · 24/01/2024 19:50

I think you need to seek your value outside of your employment. Don't link your worth to your job - it is a very small part of who you are, and if you make it your identity this can cause problems with your self worth. You need to change your mindset so that you can see your value as a person - not just someone who earns a lot or has a 'career'.

misssunshine4040 · 24/01/2024 19:52

How old are you? Can you retrain in an industry that has demand?
I honestly think it's never too late to achieve what you want to. You just have to work out the path.

KittySmith1986 · 24/01/2024 19:53

Greetingavocados · 24/01/2024 19:48

Value in any sense of the word really.
I am always going to struggle financially on minimum wage but my total lack of experience / qualifications / age makes it hard to find anything else.
And someone pointed out to me that transferable skills are worth nothing cos everyone has them plus other stuff usually or they are young and have a lot of qualifications.

Well, who said that to you? It’s not true in my experience. I changed jobs recently, same kind of job but different industry with better hours and benefits. I just applied for as many jobs as I could online, loads of rejections but then I was offered this job. Just apply for jobs you think you’d be good at. I’m 52, btw.

purplehue · 24/01/2024 19:59

Aim higher. You have it in you to get a better job and retrain. Don't put yourself down.

Age is just a number.

What job would you like?

purplehue · 24/01/2024 20:00

Try health and social care? They really really need staff and someone older with life skills is perfect

VanCleefArpels · 24/01/2024 20:02

If a lack of qualifications is holding you back why not get the qualifications you believe you need. You sound very passive whereas there will be things you can do to change your situation

Exasperatednow · 24/01/2024 20:03

If you could do anything what would you do?

ithinkthatmaybeimdreaming · 24/01/2024 20:20

Hatty65 · 24/01/2024 19:50

I think you need to seek your value outside of your employment. Don't link your worth to your job - it is a very small part of who you are, and if you make it your identity this can cause problems with your self worth. You need to change your mindset so that you can see your value as a person - not just someone who earns a lot or has a 'career'.

I agree with this. Let's face it, working is something most of us do to pay the bills, no matter how "important" the job. There is a lot more to life than work - I always felt that my real life started the minute I walked out the door of my workplace.

Fluffywhitecloudsinthesky · 24/01/2024 20:25

The carers that cared for my husband in his final months were on not much more than the minimum wage, but their value was immeasurable. I cannot express how much they were valuable to me and to him. I think they also felt valuable as well, most had pride in their job (one or two going through the motions, but that was fine). Caring is a low-wage job but highly socially valuable, not all low wage jobs have no value. Even just being a great salesperson in a shop and chatting to people, that's of value.

I think you have two choices (or possibly three). Find value in what you already do. Or swap to something similarly paid but you perceive as more valuable. Or go back and train in something you think you'd be good at and you value.

Wadermellone · 24/01/2024 20:28

How old are you?

I started my career in call centres. I don’t have a degree. But worked my way up to Senior Management.

I don’t work in call centres anymore or in that sector. But am part of the Senior Team at my current employer, one step down from the COO.

Whilst I do think I have added value in my career (things like making sure other people get opportunities to develop and progress and arguing for above average pay rises for my teams), I don’t think it the only way I have achieved things of value.

I hope I have achieved things of value outside work. That’s more important to me.

booksandbrooks · 24/01/2024 20:32

Greetingavocados · 24/01/2024 19:48

Value in any sense of the word really.
I am always going to struggle financially on minimum wage but my total lack of experience / qualifications / age makes it hard to find anything else.
And someone pointed out to me that transferable skills are worth nothing cos everyone has them plus other stuff usually or they are young and have a lot of qualifications.

This is a mind set thing.

I always tell myself and my friends have the self confidence of an average bloke working in sales. Honestly the world is full of total heejits who get away with absolute murder becuase they just relentlessly bluster through everything with entirely misplaced confidence and self belief.

At the very least change the messages you're telling yourself ie I'm always going to be poor, my skills aren't helpful, I'll always struggle, I'll add no value etc etc.

Last year everyone was talking about recruitment and retention struggles in most industries so don't be so sure your transferable skills wouldn't be highly desirable.

What do you do now? What transferable skills do you have?
Do you have any notion of what you'd like to do?
Would you mind saying what age or age bracket you're in?

You mention doing something of value. Do you want this to be local/ personal/ community

  • would you like this to be your job or a side project. Just some food for thought.

You can totally do this!

speakingofart · 25/01/2024 06:09

In honesty? I wouldn't accept it, I'd formulate a plan and execute it. E.g. I was a teacher, absolutely miserable - walked away, 10 years later I'm an HR Director.

shearwater2 · 25/01/2024 06:13

Have a look what you do with your whole life not just your job. I didn't get a promotion I went for - swings and roundabouts, it would have been a lot more work and stress and I probably wouldn't have had the headspace for the writing and painting I enjoy out of work, and would have had less time to spend with family and friends. If you want to do something with your life, go for it and don't wait for things to fall into your lap.

Thinkbiglittleone · 25/01/2024 21:22

Hatty65 · 24/01/2024 19:50

I think you need to seek your value outside of your employment. Don't link your worth to your job - it is a very small part of who you are, and if you make it your identity this can cause problems with your self worth. You need to change your mindset so that you can see your value as a person - not just someone who earns a lot or has a 'career'.

Absolutely this. OP you sound like a confidence course may help.
Your worth or value does not come from a job or a pay slip, it comes from within, knowing your own value and worth.

Elenni · 26/01/2024 07:29

Try to switch to public sector if you can. There are often training courses for people of all levels and progression via job changing (which is very common to do). I have found it good work/life balance and things like age discrimination less likely than private sector

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