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Original poster

Work Christmas party aftermath

11 replies

silversable · 21/12/2023 22:37

I had my work Christmas party recently and I'm filled with dread at some of the things I may have said. I'm not used to drinking much, and the first half of the evening went great. I had a couple of glasses of wine and was talking to everyone and overall being peasant. However, later on in the evening, one of the senior managers bought everyone shots, and I downed mine knowing it was probably a bad idea. This is my fault and I'm annoyed I had this.

Later in the evening after a couple more drinks, my plans to leave straight after the party rather than join some colleagues and go to a nightclub went straight out the window. After that taxi ride, I barely remember much. I think I was a bit of a kill joy and at numerous points said I wanted to go home but didn't want to walk back on my own to the venue a couple of us were staying at, not get a taxi by myself so decided to stay and wait for some people who would be going back the same way. It was like my brain switched off shortly after getting there even though I don't recall drinking anything else there - I remember bits of conversations I had with people, but not the whole thing. What stresses me out is that the MD and senior leadership team were there still at this point and I could have said anything.

I don't remember leaving or saying bye to anyone, which freaks me out as sober me would have said bye and thanks to the organisers. I remember parts of walking back with my manager and another colleague. I know I was ranting about something but I cannot remember what. I'm worried I may have been talking about a colleague or the party and saying something negative.

The next day we were working as normal and I had a normal meeting with her - she seemed fine and only laughed slightly when I mentioned I was feeling slightly fragile. She is quite chill and I don't think she'd tell senior leadership if I did, however you can never be sure. However, in the office, another senior manager said I kept repeating "I'm not doing shots, I know better now" (cringe).

I'm worried I've said something that may have upset someone and I'm not sure how to approach this. I'm also terrified I fell over at some point as I don't remember getting to my room and I'm mortified of the idea of someone having to help me to my room or get water for me etc.

Am I overreacting?

OP posts:
WhereIsBebèsChambre · 21/12/2023 22:39

You have 'the fear' oft known as hangxiety
'as alcohol starts to wear off, our brain tries to restore the normal chemical balance. It does this by both reducing the brain's GABA (lessening calm feelings) and increasing glutamate (making us feel more anxious). Together this has the opposite effect compared to when you were drinking and increases anxiety.'

Boomer84 · 21/12/2023 22:51

We’ve all been there (some more than others) my honest opinion is that work parties are renowned for having drunken moments. What matters is how you behave at work and what you contribute etc.
from what you’ve said it doesn’t sound outrageous even if you did do the things you suspected. Plus these things blow over so quickly it’ll be forgotten soon.

bananablues · 21/12/2023 23:17

I don't remember leaving or saying bye to anyone, which freaks me out as sober me would have said bye and thanks to the organisers

the Irish goodbye or French exit are perfectly acceptable at Christmas nights out. Friends dinner party no, but pubs etc almost an essential exit strategy to actually escape. The drunken rant is all part of the activities.

idontlikealdi · 21/12/2023 23:18

Go in with your head held high. Most of them
Will be in the same boat. Own it, learn from it, and leave earlier next year!

booksandbrooks · 21/12/2023 23:20

The colleague who announced they're not doing shots again also has beer fear. I'm sure other do too.

WandaWonder · 21/12/2023 23:22

OP how much of how others reacted (at this even or in your life on general) sticks with you?

for me people do stuff, more than likely including myself, it may annoy me/others at the time

I have enough in my own life to pick everything apart that others do so I assume they are the same as me

I would move on, I also have a 2 limit i put on myself so I don't have issues

Gowlett · 21/12/2023 23:25

Shots. Happened to me at a work party, too.
Don’t worry. It will be someone else next time.

Plus, everyone was probably too pissed to notice.
My boss was swinging out of the rafters that time!

CeciledeVolangesdeNouveau · 21/12/2023 23:28

You probably haven’t, but honestly the best thing to do is just ask someone, then you can apologise if you need to or want to. My dad attended a work party where two people had sex in a swimming pool in a glass cube and at the only one I’ve ever attended I made a complete fool of myself, was sexually assaulted by a colleague and then had a psychotic episode where I was saying said colleague had tried to murder me, and a third colleague had to take me home to hers. This was because I naively assumed that everyone saying the wine had been watered down meant… the wine had been watered down so I drank more than my lightweight self could cope with. Most people get slaughtered at those parties - at least you weren’t off your face on coke as well. But everyone has been drunk and that is indeed what I was told by the colleagues who had to look after me when I apologised.

Maddy70 · 21/12/2023 23:33

If it makes you feel any better. I went for a horrible procedure yesterday. And had valium to go for it. I then went to my xmas do.... i was so careful not to drink on the valium and a friend had given me "edibles" instead.

Fast forward to today...
No recollection past 9pm , so many texts telling me how mucg "fun" i was last night ..
I have no clue. .

Mortified ...

Fruitbatdancer · 21/12/2023 23:44

If it makes you feel better one of the women at my Xmas party got completly shitfaced, and then needed a wee, but couldn’t get out of her super skin tight jump suit as zip stuck so one of the PA’s had to tear her out of it, but not before she wee’d a bit, then had to be escorted half dressed to an UBER 😂😂 do not worry. Worse things can happen…

Original poster
silversable · 22/12/2023 14:08

Thanks everyone for your replies - you've made me feel a bit better about the situation and I think if I'd have done something bad I'd likely know about it by now!! Some of these stories did make me laugh and I'm likely making a mountain out of a molehill. I'm someone who likes to be in control and the idea of not knowing what I said just tends to panic me though I definitely didn't throw up, get together with anyone, etc.

I don't remember getting to my hotel room so I'm mainly concerned people had to look after me and show me to my hotel room which just makes me cringe. We've broken up for Christmas now but I'm leaning towards sending a couple of messages just apologising if this was the case to try and find out a bit more, or waiting until we're back?

Thanks everyone for your help and reassurance.

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