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Original poster

Started new job with incompetent manager

13 replies

sosotakemy · 15/12/2023 19:38

im a few months into a new job in a large corporate
my manager wasnt having regular 121s with me as per company policy
so I put these in
my manager often doesn’t attend or reschedules our meetings even half way thro our 121s
I’ve been understanding so far but it’s been going on for too long now
I reminded them gently that I needed my objectives to be set and they blamed me for why this has hasn’t happened - apparently I need to ‘push’ for this
how can I when they’re too busy and flustered or not attending our meetings
I am given tasks with absolutely no guidance despite being new
I have to seek advice from other colleagues
i was told off by them for something that had nothing to do with me - a fellow colleague confronted them about it and they apologised

but nobody can work like this

what do I do? Go to HR? Will they even listen?

OP posts:
MeMySonAnd1 · 15/12/2023 19:46

My only advice is get another job. You cannot reason with stupid. If you press to do your job well in that environment, or do better than your boss, you will be classed as problematic.

A good place to work is where you have a manager who you can respect and learn from (rare I know but then, life is too short to waste your strengths and ability putting up with shitty management).

IncompleteSenten · 15/12/2023 19:47

I agree you should look for another job.
In the meantime put all your requests in writing so there's a paper trail of their incompetence. Cover your own back because that type is the type who would chuck you under a bus too

MeMySonAnd1 · 15/12/2023 19:48

IME, the only way to get HR to listen is to raise a grievance but I don’t think that will sit well when you just joined.

Sunandnomoon · 15/12/2023 19:53

Look for another job, and write everything down. Dates, times, what was said and keep as much written evidence as possible.

Original poster
sosotakemy · 15/12/2023 21:21

Thing is, it’s a world famous company and very difficult to get into. Great pay etc. I’m experienced that’s how I got in. So I’m completely stunned there is someone as incompetent as this! And why I’m reluctant to leave.

But not sure I have another option, as others have said, I haven’t been there that long….and new manager isn’t long in play either. And I don’t think they will last.

OP posts:
Original poster
sosotakemy · 15/12/2023 21:22

Thanks for all the comments so far
I am keeping a diary

OP posts:
Ilovemyshed · 15/12/2023 21:24

sosotakemy · 15/12/2023 21:21

Thing is, it’s a world famous company and very difficult to get into. Great pay etc. I’m experienced that’s how I got in. So I’m completely stunned there is someone as incompetent as this! And why I’m reluctant to leave.

But not sure I have another option, as others have said, I haven’t been there that long….and new manager isn’t long in play either. And I don’t think they will last.

If you like the company and its values, hang in there until they realise how incompetent the manager is and get rid. Do everything you can by the book, network, make friends upwards and downwards and make yourself invaluable.

Restrelief · 15/12/2023 21:30

It’s company policy for 121 then absolutely request them and email so you have a record. Do you need the meetings to do a good job? If not after the email just get on with work. If you do change the emails - as we have not had a 121 meeting this week to discuss X I have not been able to…

Original poster
sosotakemy · 15/12/2023 21:38

i feel so uncomfortable around them and they are so unpredictable and odd, it’s actually making me feel stressed and sick

its tough starting a new job anyway

that’s why I don’t think I can hang in there

esp as there’s a huge project coming up in the new year which they will be extremely stressed about and I’m worried they’ll be even worse

OP posts:
Ilovemyshed · 15/12/2023 21:46

sosotakemy · 15/12/2023 21:38

i feel so uncomfortable around them and they are so unpredictable and odd, it’s actually making me feel stressed and sick

its tough starting a new job anyway

that’s why I don’t think I can hang in there

esp as there’s a huge project coming up in the new year which they will be extremely stressed about and I’m worried they’ll be even worse

Dont ruin your career for one bad person.

Hipnotised · 16/12/2023 00:11

I'd go the other way. Do the tasks you think you should be doing, tell them what you have done. Be proactive and work autonomously.

youveturnedupwelldone · 16/12/2023 08:31

Write your own objectives and send them on saying you assume these are fine unless they object to any of it.

Then smile, wave and look for a new job! These kinds of managers don't get any better and there is no point trying to handle them or get them to do what you know they should be doing.

Getmeoutofheere · 24/12/2023 10:22

I’d write down all the strange things/ cancelled 1:1s etc just to protect yourself .

i would try and do all communication you can via email/ teams.

could you raise your concerns about the 1:1s etc with their manager?

In a similar boat here- although public sector job. I’ve come to realise that the support training etc everywhere is just so shoddy that no one really knows what they’re doing including manager. I stopped talking about it for a while then had soemthing to do with my managers manager (I’m not sure if this was accidental or deliberate tbh). And let it all out that I was struggling, felt unsupported etc. since then some things have actually changed. She seems to actually care about the place and the job which really helps. Might be worth thinking about?

but also definitely be on the lookout for new jobs x

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