Bitchy office environment: how to cope?

[tsareena]

Currently rotating around different departments for four months at a time. I’m two months into a rotation and I’ve soon realised that the team is very bitchy. Various things but constant gossiping, little comments here and there, exclusion from lunch plans et cetera

It makes me feel quite down, despite enjoying the work. How do I last another two months around people who make me feel worthless?

Ignore them, they are poo poo heads.....

Kill them with kindness. It confuses them

Exactly this! They really don't know what to do when you are all sweetness and light constantly!

Tell stories here of the nutty crap they get up to for us to enjoy, and count the days until you rotate away.

Love the idea of killing with kindness :)

but how to do that and not become someone you don’t want to be?

Tell yourself that you're the adult and they're the mean girls who haven't matured emotionally beyond the age of fifteen. Do the work, respond politely and professionally and take the chance at lunchtime to escape for a walk or read a magazine.

Have a timetable on the fridge at home of how many days left and when you come home cross off that day. It's quite motivating to see the days go down. If all else fails tell yourself you only have to live with it for eight weeks - they live with being like that all the time.

Can you tell I've been through this as well? 😄

Anything that is a statement doesn’t need an answer, so a bitchy comment about someone else can be ignored or grey rocked.
If they try to involve you in bad behaviour just say you don’t get involved office politics.
At the same time do nice things for everyone , even the badly behaved, discriminating against no-one. Spread the love, be the epitome of optimism.
And count the days down.

It's only two months. You can do it. I know if feels awful at the time though.
Do you get some time off over Xmas? Take annual leave?

Day to day some things might help.

1. A walk every lunch time.
2. Go out to buy a lunchtime treat a few times a week.
3. Headphones at lunchtime.
4. A really good packed lunch to look forward to and your favourite soft drinks.
5. Make up silly stories in your head about your awful colleagues.
6. Have other things to look forward to over the next two months: meals out, drinks with friends, cinema, bowling etc.

I know it’s hard and I’m fortunate to have worked with mostly lovely people who I genuinely get on well with and feel liked by, but just statistically speaking me and my partner reckon that about 1 in every 5 people is a knobhead to work with.

I know it’s cliche to say, but really think about what they are doing. Think about how unpleasant and insecure your heart and soul must be to feel a need to try and put others down over insignificant bullshit.

I do always remind myself to try and be empathetic because that is not cope, I genuinely believe people who act this way must be really suffering with some aspect of themselves.

And I agree with PPs that being aloof and polite is the best way to defend yourself both personally and professionally.

I know it’s cliche to say, but really think about what they are doing. Think about how unpleasant and insecure your heart and soul must be to feel a need to try and put others down over insignificant bullshit

At exjob there was a little departmental clique, including the two managers. I managed to deal with it by wondering what part of them felt so unwanted and excluded that they had to try and make other people feel like that.

I am 'killing with kindness' at the mo at my work - yes it confuses them (which is good to watch!) but it's exhausting!
And ultimately I don't think it is doing ME any favours!

Just get on with your work and ignore them.

My office is like this at the moment, the toxicity genuinely killing me!
The killing them with kindness, doesn't really work. They just continue.
Im going to try and ignore them all and continue looking for a new job.

@Bromptotoo please take this advice. It really helps you and they will be so discombobulated.