I really need some advice/perspective on what I'm finding a stressful work situation.
For background. I'm a middle leader, who works 22.5 hours a week (trying to have this increased but finances are a barrier as it stands).
A year ago, a key member of a project delivery team left and was never replaced. By default unspoken agreement, myself and a colleague took up thr role. This was never formally discussed with us, just assumed. The project is an annual delivery, and last year we pulled it off, despite a lot of stress and putting lots of extra hours in.
At the time this team member left and many times since then I have raised concerns regarding our ability to effectively deliver this project on the staffing resources we had, both in writing in mid year and end of year reveiws and verbally. This concern because greater when my team member's husband was diagnosed with cancer. At this point I raised very strong concerns about the resilience of the team, as we had no jdea how his treatment and health would pan out, at a key delivery time. Needless to say this has fallen on deaf ears.
This week, due to my colleague having to be off work etc due to caring for her husband, balls have been dropped, and despite me putting in a huge number of extra hours, there have been issues with the delivery of the project. Which I and my colleague have been blamed for. Despite the repeated concerns raised regarding the real danger of failure, to the most senior members of the organisation, no extra resources have been given or plans put in place to mitigant my concerns. This is a project I have been involved with for 10 years, so feel I have a good idea of the potential pitfalls.
Last week alone I put in a huge amount of extra work, working when my child was playing and in bed, in order to make up for the shortfall. These are hours I will not get paid overtime for, and will only be able to claim as time off in lieu ( which is struggle to take due to the demands of the job, and my hours).
How on earth do I deal with this (other than leaving. Currently I'm trying but also not as easy as that). We still have a month of this left, and I'm really struggling at this point. What on earth can I do, and how do I response to the accusations if being responsible for the issues